


Disclosure

by gleefulmusings



Series: Crossing Boundaries [4]
Category: All My Children, Glee
Genre: Dysfunctional Family, Family, Family Secrets, Gen, Kurt is a Doctor, Past Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-27
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:00:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 44,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23337277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gleefulmusings/pseuds/gleefulmusings
Summary: At the trial of Zach Slater for the murder of Edmund Grey, the prosecution has one final witness: Kurt Hummel.
Relationships: Kurt Hummel/Zach Slater
Series: Crossing Boundaries [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1396777
Comments: 132
Kudos: 116





	1. Truth and Consequences

**Author's Note:**

> This is a very niche story and I don't expect anyone to read it. I wrote it because I love the idea of Kurt Hummel and Erica Kane in any scene together. I've since had to write her out, hopefully temporarily, of _Managed Care_ , so I sought to bring them together once more.
> 
> I don't know why I so enjoy writing Kurt into soap operas. Perhaps because that while he is dramatic, he tends to minimize his own drama. I like putting him into these larger-than-life scenarios to see what he'll do. He often surprises even me. And, believe me, this is LARGER THAN LIFE - but typical for a soap.
> 
> I don't know if there will be more to this. Probably not, but I did enjoy writing it. If you read this, thank you. If you choose not to, that's just fine. I don't think anyone who is unfamiliar with _All My Children_ will have the foggiest clue of what's going on.

“Please be seated.”

The courtroom followed the instruction with little fanfare, curious and somewhat anxious for defense attorney Livia Cudahy to present her case. She was liked and respected by most of Pine Valley, but many were surprised she had agreed to represent town pariah Zach Slater. It was well known Livia believed everyone was entitled to the best defense possible, but she wasn’t keen to accept cases she couldn’t win. Many speculated there was more to the story than the prosecution had offered.

The murder of Edmund Grey had struck horror throughout Pine Valley. Many had known, loved, and even revered the Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist who had been confined to a wheelchair less than a year ago. His fiery and ignoble death was undeserved and demanded retribution, and the charge was led by his widow and two teenage children.

Maria Grey, the widow, stared at Slater and snarled. She had been a beloved figure and respected physician presumed dead five years previous. She had returned to Pine Valley several months ago with severe memory loss and Slater in tow. He had found her wandering in the Nevada desert following her plane crash and nursed her back to health. During that time, they had become lovers. When Maria began experiencing resurgent memories, she immediately returned home and attempted to resume her life.

It had been difficult. Her medical license had lapsed, and she’d had to fight for it to be reinstated. She had missed formative years of her children’s lives and they resented her sudden return and the authority she presumed to have over them. Her husband had mourned but finally accepted her death, trying to move on with his life. He’d had other relationships, but none of any import, unable to forget his true love.

But they had slowly become closer. Maria still loved Zach, but had chosen Edmund, who doubted his wife’s fidelity and for good reason. Still, they had been trying to make it work when he perished in a stable fire at their estate, Wildwind. Zach was arrested. He never confessed, but neither did he deny the charges. The entire town turned out with pitchforks and torches.

Zach’s motive was clear: he loved Maria. It was believed he was unable to accept she had chosen Edmund and, in a fit of cowardly pique, had bashed the man over the head during the fire and left him to burn.

The sole witness and accuser was Slater’s own son, Ethan Cambias. Bitter at Zach’s refusal to accept him, he had lied and claimed to have seen his father strike Edmund. His word was accepted, and Zach hadn’t challenged it, cementing in the minds of many that he was guilty.

The courtroom was doubtful Livia would be able to see him freed but were interested in seeing what she had up her sleeve.

“Excuse me, Your Honor,” the District Attorney called, rising to his feet, “but the People have one additional witness.”

Murmurs of unrest quietly unfurled in the galley, wondering just who this witness was and why they were coming forward now.

Erica Kane was annoyed, and her daughter Bianca Montgomery was confused but hopeful. She didn’t believe Zach guilty, but the evidence didn’t offer her much to argue his case to her family. As a child, she had known and loved Edmund, who had been her uncle through her mother’s marriage to his brother Dimitri Marick. She knew Zach, although not well, and didn’t believe he had killed the man.

Ethan Cambias pursed his lips, conscious that his house of cards was hanging on only by a thread. He worried this new witness would see it tumbling down. There was little physical evidence and the wealth of the case rested on his lie. His girlfriend, Kendall Hart, the eldest daughter of Erica Kane, looped her arm through his and offered silent reassurance. The only part of this Ethan regretted was lying to her. He loved her and knew she had trust issues with men. If she ever found out he had lied, he would lose her forever, and rightly so.

Livia tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. “Objection, Your Honor. The Prosecution has already rested.”

“We have a new witness who was only just made available to us,” the District Attorney protested.

“And why is that?” Livia chirped in a hard voice. “This case has made national news. The Prosecution has had more than enough time to subpoena this mysterious witness to offer their testimony. What possible information does this person have that should allow the Prosecution to reopen their arguments?”

The judge looked over his glasses at the District Attorney. “Mrs. Cudahy raises an excellent and valid point. Well?”

The District Attorney felt sweat break out above his lip, wishing he had never taken this case to trial. The only real evidence he had to offer was the eyewitness testimony of a scorned son and Slater’s refusal to refute said testimony. He knew pulling this move out of the ether was a risk and could only hope it would pay off. Otherwise, reelection was doubtful.

“Your Honor,” he persisted, trying to keep the whine from his voice, “our witness only returned to Pine Valley late last night after performing two months of relief work in Darfur.”

The judge considered the words.

“And what does this witness have to say?” Livia demanded. “What is so important that the Prosecution couldn’t wait to present their case, or ask for a continuance until all witnesses were available?”

The judge nodded before boring his eyes into those of the District Attorney.

“Your Honor, it is the Prosecution’s belief this witness has intimate knowledge of the defendant and his motives for the assault against Edmund Grey. This was only made known to us recently, and though we attempted numerous times to contact the witness, they were unavailable until just now.”

Zach appeared only mildly interested but was silently seething as to who this supposed witness could be.

The judge pondered the request for a pregnant moment, then cleared his throat. “I’m going to allow this.” He held up a hand. “I’m not finished, Mrs. Cudahy. As I said, I’m going to allow this, but under certain conditions. This testimony better be short and to the point, Counselor, or I’m going to impose sanctions. Is that clear?”

“Crystal, Your Honor.”

Livia grumbled and stalked back to her seat, leaning over and whispering to her client, who made it clear he had no idea what was going on.

“Proceed,” the judge intoned.

“The Prosecution calls Kurt Hummel to the stand.”

* * *

The courtroom waited with bated breath as the doors opened and a young man came charging in. He was dressed in an exquisite navy suit, obviously designer, and a silver tie. His skin was deeply tanned, which made sense, considering where he had spent the past two months, making his beautiful eyes all the more startling. The heels of his loafers clacked angrily on the marble floor. He was furious.

Whispers immediately broke out. Those who were unfamiliar with him wondered just who he was and what he had to say. Those who recognized him from the hospital – especially the Kane and Grey families – wondered why he had been called at all.

Kurt stalked past the prosecution and defense tables, and made his way to the witness box, where he swore his oath before gracefully lowering himself into the chair. He then glared at the prosecutor.

“Mr. Hummel …” the District Attorney began.

Kurt raised a brow. “Excuse me,” he said, eyes narrowing, “I am a medical doctor with a law degree. I have a specialty in Obstetrics and Gynecology, with a subspeciality in Gynecological Surgery. I worked hard for those credentials. I insist on being addressed as _Dr_. _Hummel_.”

Livia straightened in her chair and smirked. Well, this looked interesting. Apparently, the Prosecution’s star witness was as unhappy to be there as she was to have him. She decided her safest bet was to shut up and allow this farce to play out a bit.

“Of course, _Dr._ Hummel,” the District Attorney oozed with utmost insincerity.

Kurt’s eye twitched.

“Please do tell us about those credentials of which you’re so proud.” The District Attorney turned to the judge. “Goes to credibility, Your Honor.”

“I’ll allow it.”

Kurt huffed. “I obtained my undergraduate degrees, and my medical and law degrees, from Brown University.”

He then shut up. He was going to make the insufferable twit work for this.

“And how old are you, Dr. Hummel?”

“I am twenty-eight years old.”

There were soft gasps from the gallery.

“Can you explain how someone so young has already racked up so many degrees, especially from such a prestigious university?”

Kurt offered a bland look. “I graduated high school when I was sixteen. I had been taking concurrent courses at the local community college since freshman year. Thanks to those, and to my A.P. test scores, when I graduated high school, I had earned enough credits to be considered a college junior. I applied and was accepted into Brown’s combined B.S./M.D. program, which typically take six years. I took seven, as I added two additional degrees.

“I completed my internship and residency at Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore.”

“I see. So, you’ve only recently graduated medical school?”

Kurt stared. “No. I graduated five years ago. I've been in practice for two years.”

“I see. Forgive me, Dr. Hummel, but this isn't quite adding up. Isn’t the normal OB/GYN residency four years?”

“It is. I finished it in three. I’m highly motivated.”

Livia rolled her eyes and stood. “Your Honor, the defense stipulates Dr. Hummel’s credentials and wonders why my illustrious counterpart is treating his own witness as a _hostile_ witness.”

“So noted, and an intriguing question. Proceed, Counselor,” he instructed the man, “but get to the point.”

“Why did you choose your field, Dr. Hummel?”

“My mother miscarried my sister when she was seven months pregnant. They had to induce labor. After she delivered, a laparoscopy revealed she had stage-four ovarian cancer. The tumors impacted the baby’s growth and development, and my mother died two months later. I vowed to myself then that I would do everything in my power to make sure women’s healthcare became the priority it deserves to be.”

The District Attorney fought off a blush and rolled his shoulders. Not expecting that response and the emotion it engendered in the audience, he opted to shift direction. “And what brought you to Pine Valley, Dr. Hummel?”

“Work.”

Tittering broke out.

The District Attorney blinked. “Can you elaborate?”

Kurt pursed his lips and lowered his mouth the microphone. “Work,” he slowly repeated stretching out a monosyllabic response for far longer than should have been possible. “The offer from Pine Valley Hospital was generous and lucrative. The easy access to Philadelphia and New York City were perks.”

“And you had no other reason to come to Pine Valley,” the District Attorney snidely said.

“I’m sorry, was that a question?”

“It was.”

“I see. Will you repeat it, please?”

“Did you have another reason to relocate to Pine Valley?” the District Attorney said through clenched teeth.

“No.”

The District Attorney grinned. “Dr. Hummel, have you ever worked at the Front Street Clinic?”

“Intermittently. I did some pro-bono work there for a few months after I moved here.”

“You performed under the supervision of Dr. David Hayward?”

Seated in the gallery, David raised a brow, wondering where this line of questioning was going.

“I did.”

“What is your opinion of Dr. Hayward?”

“Objection, Your Honor,” Livia interrupted. “Dr. Hayward is not on trial here.”

“Goes to collusion, Your Honor.”

Kurt scoffed.

“I’ll allow it,” the judge said, “but consider your leash tightened, Counselor. Get to your point quickly.”

“Yes, Your Honor. Dr. Hummel?”

Kurt shrugged. “He’s an exceptional physician and a brilliant man. If I needed medical treatment, I’d choose him.”

David smiled.

“And personally?” the District Attorney pressed.

“Personally? I don’t have a personal relationship with Dr. Hayward. If you’re asking what I think of him personally, I would say that, aside from his brilliance, his morals and ethics are questionable, if not absent altogether. He would agree with me.”

David smirked.

“That said, when David commits himself to a patient, he does so fully.”

“Dr. Hummel,” the District Attorney barked, “isn’t it true you refused to perform a rape examination on Bianca Montgomery?”

“Objection!” Livia roared, leaping to her feet. She began barking about privacy laws, HIPAA, and that Bianca Montgomery had no bearing on this case.

Bianca winced and held Erica’s hand more tightly.

“What the hell is going on here?” whispered a baffled Erica.

“I’m moving toward something, Your Honor,” the District Attorney said. “I promise.”

“Get there quickly,” the judge hissed. “Answer the question, please, Dr. Hummel.”

Kurt flexed his jaws. “I did not refuse. David asked me if I would perform the rape kit because I’m a gynecologist, where he is not. He was also hopeful Ms. Montgomery would press charges against her assailant, and he didn’t want his personal relationship with her to be construed in a negative light. I didn’t feel comfortable with the request. I said as much, and David didn’t press me further.”

“Dr. Hummel, isn’t it true that you have performed rape examinations in the past? During your time in Baltimore, you are on record as performing several, all of which saw successful prosecutions against the perpetrators.”

“That is true,” Kurt said, “but it’s emotionally devastating, on both the patient and the provider. I performed the cases you spoke of because I was on call during those times the patients were admitted. I didn’t have a choice in the matter. I did the work to the best of my ability, but it certainly is not _enjoyable_ , Counselor.”

“I’m sure it’s not. The question remains, however, why you didn’t want to perform the exam on Ms. Montgomery?”

David stood. “You don’t have to answer that, Kurt!” at the same time Livia shouted, “Objection! Relevancy?”

“I’ll answer the question,” Kurt said calmly.

“Proceed,” the judge ordered.

“As a rape survivor, I prefer not to perform rape examinations unless absolutely necessary. Dr. Hayward is fully qualified to perform them and kindly excused me.”

Complete silence descended over the courtroom. The District Attorney’s mouth fell open and he gaped unattractively at his witness. Bianca covered her mouth and flashed back to her rape trial, horrified another person was being made to discuss their own trauma and for no apparent reason. Erica was glaring daggers at the D.A. for starting this and the judge for allowing it. David muttered imprecations under his breath as tears fell from Kendall’s eyes.

“This is outrageous,” Ethan murmured.

“Don’t even think about it,” Livia hissed to Zach, who was fidgeting in his chair and appeared ready to stand up and scream about the obscenity of it all. If there was one thing she had learned about her client, it was that he couldn’t abide someone being victimized.

The jury appeared utterly appalled and the District Attorney knew he was dangerously close to losing them completely.

“I highly suggest you get to the point you earlier referenced,” the judge growled, “or I’ll declare you in contempt and see you in a jail cell.”

“Hear! Hear!” Erica shouted.

The judge banged his gavel but didn’t reprimand her.

“Dr. Hummel,” the District Attorney said after recovering himself, “what is your relationship with Bianca Montgomery?”

“None at all,” Kurt replied. “I know who she is, of course. I followed the Michael Cambias trial when I was in Baltimore. I saw her at the clinic, and I’ve seen her at the hospital since, but we’ve never interacted. If we were ever introduced, I don’t remember it.”

Bianca gave an absent nod. She could recall seeing him around the hospital but couldn’t remember an instance of them even making eye contact, let alone speaking.

“And what about Erica Kane? Kendall Hart?” the Prosecutor pressed.

“Again, only by reputation. Ms. Hart is a co-founder of Fusion Cosmetics, of which my best friend is a devotee. I’ve probably added thousands of dollars to Ms. Hart’s coffers, but I don’t know her. As for Ms. Kane …”

His eyes softened. “I’ve never met her, but my mother was a big fan. She read Ms. Kane’s autobiography often and used it as a, well, I guess you say a guide to living. Ms. Kane was very honest and forthright about her struggles and triumphs, and between each line of pain and glory was a kernel of wisdom to be found and shaped and made applicable to everyone.

“I would imagine every reader had a similar reaction. You felt she was sitting there with you, relating her life and what she had learned from every travail and achievement. It came across that she was not only your teacher, but your own personal cheerleader. I remember reading passages to my mother as she lay dying, finding comfort in a woman who had fought her way through so much.”

Erica placed a shaky hand over her heart, tears streaming from her eyes. She had written that book at the height of her modeling career, when her vanity and narcissism were at their most extreme. She knew it would be successful because, at that time, her name alone could move mountains. Looking back on it now, she was surprised at how open and honest she had been, given that she had since become a much more guarded person.

To know that her words had so deeply touched someone, had perhaps inspired them or offered any modicum of comfort, was incredibly moving. Her outrage at this senseless questioning grew only more pronounced.

The District Attorney knew he was just about to lose his audience completely and decided to go in for the kill. “Dr. Hummel, what is your relationship with the defendant, Zach Slater?”

“I don’t have one.”

“Isn’t it true that you and Mr. Slater have been engaged in a sexual affair since your arrival in Pine Valley?” he thundered.

“Absolutely not,” Kurt smoothly intoned. His eyes slid toward Zach and looked him up and down. “Sadly.”

Zach raised a brow in surprise, his eyes sparkling.

The District Attorney opened his mouth to rebut.

“My arrival in Pine Valley predates that of Mr. Slater,” Kurt continued. “I have never met him, let alone slept with him. I did, however, have a sexual relationship with his son, Ethan Cambias.”

Complete silence descended in the courtroom; tension so rife it could be filleted.

The District Attorney at once understood his entire case had been blown out of the water. He had been given bad information, not conducted his due diligence in investigating it, and had antagonized the jury, the judge, and the entire gallery for no reason.

“It began shortly after Mr. Cambias moved to Pine Valley. It lasted over a handful of dates for less than a month. He didn’t wish to pursue a more serious relationship, which I understood and respected. I was more than busy with my work at the hospital and clinic. We parted amicably and he began seeing Ms. Hart a little over a month later. I haven’t spoken to him since, but I wish he and Kendall nothing but the best. I want Ethan to be happy.”

Ethan couldn’t keep the blush from his face. He realized this might happen from the moment Kurt stepped into the courtroom, and though he didn’t like the result, he didn’t blame Kurt, who was the most honest person he knew. They had cared for each other greatly, but knew a long-term relationship wouldn’t have worked, even though the sex had been mind-blowing.

Seriously, it had never been that good before and, no matter how much he loved Kendall, he knew it would never be that good again. He should have told Kendall about the affair, but he hadn’t, and that was on him. Still, it wasn’t as though he had cheated on her. He appreciated Kurt’s kind words and was devastated to learn Kurt had been assaulted in the same manner as Bianca.

Livia was too enthralled by the story to object, while the District Attorney found he now couldn’t string a sentence together. Zach nudged his attorney, who blinked and stood.

“Your Honor, I fail to understand the purpose of this line of questioning. Why has Dr. Hummel been required to open a vein for no reason other than the District Attorney’s ghoulish curiosity?”

“I agree,” the judge said. “Dr. Hummel, you are dismissed from the stand with my sincere apologies. Thank you for …”

“Dr. Hummel!” the District Attorney roared, desperate to salvage this situation. “Is it not true that you moved to Pine Valley to be close to Erica Kane and her daughters, to stalk them from afar? Is it not true you refused to perform the rape examination on Bianca Montgomery because you weren’t yet ready for your true relationship with her to be revealed?”

“What are you talking about?” demanded a flabbergasted Livia.

Kurt said nothing, appearing entirely unruffled. "That is not true."

“Isn’t it true,” the District Attorney seethed, furious eyes never leaving Kurt’s own, “that you are the long-lost son of Erica Kane? That you have been operating under your mother’s orders for almost a year? That it was in fact _you_ , and not Bianca Montgomery, who murdered Michael Cambias to avenge your sister’s rape?"

"No."

“Isn’t it true that Erica Kane told you to seduce both Ethan Cambias and his father, the defendant Zach Slater, in order to secure rights to Cambias Industries for your niece, Miranda Montgomery? That you pointed Ethan Cambias in the direction of your sister, Kendall Hart, so that her seduction might succeed where yours failed? Isn’t it true that Edmund Grey learned of your connection to the Kane family and sought to blackmail you with that information so you would convince Zach Slater to leave Maria Grey in peace?”

“Objection!” Livia screamed as the courtroom descended into anarchy, the judge pounding his gavel to no avail.

Erica and Ethan were on their feet, screaming for the man to leave Kurt alone. Kendall and Bianca were staring at each other in horrified confusion, unable to believe the man on their stand was their brother, though also unable to dismiss it. Bianca knew there was no way Kurt had killed Michael; she knew she alone had done it, but what of the rest?

Zach sat rigidly in his chair, furious that a young man, no older than his son, was having his life ripped apart for public consumption because the District Attorney couldn’t make his case. This reeked of desperation. He didn’t care about Erica or her family, but this young man was entitled to his privacy. Not only had his rape been exposed, but he had been accused of malpractice, espionage, and even murder for no reason other than the District Attorney’s reckless machinations.

The District Attorney stalked toward the witness box and glared into Kurt’s placid eyes. “Isn’t it true that when you failed to seduce Zach Slater, Edmund Grey threatened to expose you, so you conspired with Slater to do away with Mr. Grey, thus guaranteeing his information about you would die with him, leaving Slater to pick up the pieces with Mr. Grey’s widow?”

Kurt’s lips flattened. “Which question would you like me to answer first?”

* * *

The chastised District Attorney was led from the room in handcuffs after being cited for contempt. He would be cooling his heels in a cell for the foreseeable future. The judge refused a mistrial but had struck many of the questions from the record, stating he would conduct the interrogation of Dr. Hummel himself, before dismissing court for the day and ordering a continuance until the Assistant District Attorney could be brought up to speed.

Court would reconvene three days hence, with Mrs. Cudahy’s presentation of her defense.

“Dr. Hummel,” the judge began, “please let me again apologize for the Prosecution’s appalling lack of decorum in his questioning. Let me also thank you for agreeing to answer some of his more outrageous questions. I understand these proceedings have been highly irregular, but I don’t wish to impose upon our jury any further, nor to allow the course of justice to be any further degraded."

“I understand,” Kurt said quietly.

The judge nodded. “Thank you. To answer some of the more burning charges, is it still your testimony that you had never had contact with Erica Kane or her daughters?”

“It is. I have never met them.”

“Is Erica Kane your mother?”

“She is not. I am willing to take a DNA test to prove this, but the timeline bears it out. I am between the ages of Ms. Hart and Ms. Montgomery. At the time I was born, Ms. Kane was already an international celebrity and married to Travis Montgomery. Had she been pregnant, it would have been noted.”

Erica nodded from her seat, disgusted with the line of inquiry and all this young man had been made to endure. She appreciated his defense of her.

The judge raised a brow. “I see. Speaking of DNA tests, the District Attorney handed me the results of one before he was escorted from the room. Would you care to guess what it says? Would you like to amend your testimony?”

Kurt slowly exhaled. “I have a fair idea of its contents and, no, I do not wish to change my testimony. Erica Kane is not my mother.”

The judge held up a folder. “Then can you please explain to me how it is you share more than twelve percent DNA with Bianca Montgomery?”

Bianca’s gasp was audible.

Kurt pursed his lips. “As I stated previously, if Erica Kane were my mother, by virtue of her known history, either Travis or Jackson Montgomery would be my father. Were that true, the percentage of genetic markers Ms. Montgomery and I share would be at least double what that test suggests.”

The judge looked at him and at last nodded. “Given the number of DNA tests I have reviewed in my time on the bench, I am willing to stipulate that fact. You and I both know, however, that the percentage is high enough that it begs further questioning. All humans share some trace of DNA, but this test suggests a familial relationship with, at the very least, Ms. Montgomery.”

Kurt said nothing, for no question was asked. The judge knew this and allowed his point to stand for a moment before delving back in.

“You assert Erica Kane is not your mother, but are you related to her?”

Color rose high in Kurt’s cheeks. “Yes,” he bit out.

Erica sat up straight, staring at the young man before her. She might not have understood genetics but was willing to concede that a judge and a doctor certainly knew more about it than she. If Dr. Hummel _was_ related to her, he must be the son of her half-brother, Mark Dalton.

“Uncle Mark?” Bianca whispered.

Erica shrugged a shoulder. It was certainly possible, she supposed. She hadn’t seen Mark for several years before he died two springs previous. She couldn’t imagine he wouldn’t have told her he had a son, unless he hadn’t known. Mark had been dependent on drugs for several years, particularly around the time Kurt would have been born.

If all of this were true, and she was starting to suspect it was, she mourned her brother had never known his son. She felt terrible for Kurt, but she did have to wonder about several of the District Attorney’s earlier points. Obviously, Kurt knew he was her nephew and had probably moved to Pine Valley to be close to her. She didn’t believe it was for any nefarious purpose, but it was curious.

As he stated, Kurt and she had never met. She had no reason to disbelieve his claims that he was also unfamiliar with Bianca and Kendall. It wasn’t as though he had come to town grifting for money or prestige. He was obviously highly intelligent and had a lucrative career. His bearing and manner suggested he was financially comfortable, if not outright affluent.

“He wants a family,” Kendall murmured, “just like I did.”

She felt for the guy, absolutely. She knew what it was to come to an unknown town, desperate for some connection, for acknowledgment from a family he never knew. He certainly hadn’t gone about it in the terrible way she had. He was well-educated with an important career he was only just beginning. He had been serving refuges in a war-torn country, not for kudos, but because he knew he could help.

Yes, she was troubled by his prior relationship with Ethan, but more because Ethan hadn’t disclosed it to her. Their relationship was relatively new, and she fairly believed herself in love with him, but they hadn’t told each other everything about their pasts. It was entirely possible Ethan had planned to tell her but hadn’t gotten around to it yet. She was equally as guilty concerning her past dalliances.

She didn’t know that Ethan was bisexual but had no trouble with it. She had done some experimenting of her own, and it wasn’t as if he were settling. Ethan was six foot-five inches of total beefcake, and the English accent was a bonus. She had seen how he turned the heads of both men and women, and Kurt was stunningly beautiful in his own right. She didn’t believe Kurt had connived the relationship to hurt her, for he had been involved with Ethan prior to her; he had no way of knowing Ethan would pursue her later on, and it was apparent Ethan had no clue she and Kurt were cousins.

“How are you related to Ms. Kane?” the judge asked.

“I am her nephew,” Kurt said woodenly.

The courtroom exploded with whispers.

“And when did you discover this information?” 

“Shortly after my father died. I was a sophomore in high school and would graduate three months later.”

Erica sighed and ducked her head, tears falling from her eyes. Obviously poor Kurt had been kept in the dark about his adoption, or that this father was actually his stepfather, and had not found out the truth until after his sole remaining parent had died. How awful. And to be left alone at such a young age to make your way in the world? It was horrendous, but Kurt had done extremely well for himself, all down to his drive and perseverance.

She thought she might rather enjoy being someone’s aunt.

“And Ms. Kane was, until today, unaware of your relationship?”

Kurt sighed and placed a hand over his eyes. “Yes. I moved to Pine Valley to be near her, and Bianca and Kendall. They’re the only family I have left.”

He removed his hands and the courtroom saw the tears streaming down his face. Bianca and Kendall’s eyes immediately welled in response.

“But I didn’t have the courage to approach them. You must understand that Erica Kane is an icon. Her life has been meticulously detailed in the press, both by tabloids and reputable publications alike. I had no desire to put her or her family in the crosshairs once again.

“I was in high school when Kendall came to Pine Valley and announced herself Erica’s daughter. I read with the world how she had been conceived, of the horror Erica was made to endure at only fourteen years old. I wasn’t just going to present myself to them and be another obstacle in their way of becoming a family.”

Erica choked on a sob and shook her head.

“I was in college when Bianca was outed by the press. I felt terrible for her, that what was a most private matter was splayed across the tabloids like fodder. I read about the schism between her and Erica, and I understood both sides. I never believed Erica wouldn’t accept her daughter – she’s a gay icon; she’s been surrounded by gay men and women her entire career – but my father went through a similar crisis when I came out to him.

“He wasn’t angry at me. He wasn’t ashamed of me. He was _terrified_ , because he knew what the world did to gay people, of how we were often perceived. He didn’t want that for me anymore than I’m sure Erica didn’t for her own daughter.”

Erica nodded, wiping her face.

“And I wasn’t going to pop of the woodwork at Bianca, wave my hands, and say, _Here I am! Your unknown gay cousin! Our experiences are nothing alike, and you’ve been horribly traumatized, but let’s play family reunion and maybe you’ll feel better!_ ”

Kendall snorted. Obviously, she came by her dark humor honestly.

“I didn’t want to take anything away from Bianca’s experience,” Kurt continued, “both the good and the bad. Coming out is an intensely private and personal journey. Hers was hijacked, and I didn’t want to be yet another person in her face telling her what to say or how to feel.”

The judge cleared his throat. “And what of the District Attorney’s charge that you were the one to kill Michael Cambias?”

Kurt’s eyes turned distant. “I was raped in the locker room of my high school when I was fifteen years old. I never told anyone. My mother was gone by then, and my father’s health was precarious. He’d had a heart attack only months before. I couldn’t do that to him. I couldn’t tell him, and then lie and say everything would be alright.”

Ethan began breathing heavily in a desperate attempt not to cry. Kendall grabbed his hand and squeezed for dear life.

“The school wouldn’t have cared. They were already on record as refusing to support me. I was verbally and physically assaulted daily. I was ridiculed and told to kill myself. My home was vandalized often, as was my father’s business. The school did nothing. The police did nothing. I had no reason to believe they would do anything about the rape. I’m sure they would have thought I deserved it or had instigated it.

“I had just moved to Pine Valley when Michael Cambias raped Bianca. By that time, yes, I was aware she was my cousin. I also knew there was nothing I could do. Me announcing myself wasn’t going to bring her any comfort. People who have survived rape are well aware there are others who have, as well. Cambias also attacked Erica and Kendall, yet nothing was done. Erica had already been through it once before. My story wasn’t needed. Bianca had enough to deal with, without me adding to it.

“That’s why I refused to perform her rape kit. I didn’t tell David it was for that reason, but I had disclosed that I was a rape survivor and preferred not to work on such cases. He respected that. I knew I had no business performing that exam. It would have been completely unprofessional.

“No, I didn’t kill Michael Cambias. I wish I had, which is why I believed Kendall when she confessed. I thought she had killed him to avenge her sister. I would have done the same.”

Kendall had a grim smile on her face. This was a man she could respect.

“So, no, I never told them I was related to them. I honestly don’t know if I ever would have told them. Probably not. Yes, I am a coward. I didn’t know how they would react, and I never wanted them to think I was after money or fame. I couldn’t do anything for them, had no means by which to help them, so I stood in the background, hoping and wishing for the best. Like I said, they’re the only family I have. It was … it really was enough just to be near them.”

“Oh, that poor boy,” Erica sobbed. “That poor, sweet boy.”

“And Ethan Cambias?” the judge asked.

A fond smile passed Kurt’s face. “Ethan was … a surprise. When I first laid eyes on him, my heart stopped. I had never seen anyone so beautiful. I was completely smitten, but it wasn’t as though I believed I’d ever had a chance with him. No one was more surprised than me when he offered to buy me a drink. Things progressed quickly after that.

“He was Ethan Ramsey, then. Had I known he was a Cambias, I wouldn’t have slept with him. Not because I blamed him in any way for his uncle’s actions, but out of simple loyalty to Bianca. Had I done that, I would have missed out on someone truly special. Ethan is a good man who has had a difficult life. When I look at him, I saw the sweet boy he truly is, the one who just wants to be loved and accepted. I understood that desire.

“He was the first … he was the only man I’ve been with since the rape.”

Ethan gasped.

“I didn’t tell him that. I didn’t tell him many things about myself. I didn’t want to poison what we had. He made me feel beautiful. He made me feel desired, and for the right reasons. He was so kind to me, so gentle, and he healed something in me I thought would be forever broken.”

Ethan hunched over and sobbed.

“But we both knew what we had wouldn’t last. We were each keeping our own secrets and we knew that. We respected each other enough to acknowledge it and let it go. When he began dating Kendall, I was happy for him. All I want for Ethan is his happiness.”

Zach shook his head. His lying bastard of a son hadn’t deserved this incredible man.

“And your relationship with the defendant?”

Kurt sighed, fighting the urge to roll his eyes. “As I previously testified, I have never met Mr. Slater. I have never spoken with him. I have no reason to collude with him in anything, let alone murder.”

“What about financial incentives?”

To everyone’s surprise, Kurt burst out laughing, and continued laughing for several long moments. Finally, he wiped his eyes and shook his head.

“Please forgive me, Your Honor. I didn’t anticipate your question and couldn’t hold back my response. Financial incentives? Your Honor, my net worth is more than that of the Kane family, Mr. Slater, Cambias Industries, Chandler Enterprises, and Cortlandt Electronics combined. I am a multi-billionaire; I have no need for anyone’s money.”

The judge raised his brows. “And the source of this money?”

“My mother was Suzanne Delacroix, the only child of Katrine Valois.”

Everyone stared.

“Holy shit,” Zach muttered.

“After my mother died, my grandmother was to hold the estate in trust until I was of age, but upon my father’s death, I became an emancipated minor. My grandmother died right after I started college, so the money and title immediately transferred to me, but it was already in process.

“I don’t know if Mr. Slater killed Edmund Grey. All I know is that I was in no way involved. I would never have hurt Edmund.”

Maria sharply raised her head, wondering at that phrasing. Kurt was her colleague at the hospital, but she didn’t really know him outside of staff meetings and running into each other in break room. They sometimes referred patients to one another, but they’d had no meaningful personal interaction. In fact, she couldn’t name a single person on the staff to whom he was close. Kurt all but projected a personal bubble that screamed the desire for no contact.

The judge frowned. “Did you know the victim?”

Kurt looked down at his hands, twisting in his lap. “Not well. I had seen him around the hospital with Maria. He … inadvertently … discovered I was researching his family. He confronted me, I was less than forthcoming, and he ordered the DNA test you now hold in your hand.”

“Why were you researching his family?”

Kurt ran his tongue over his lips. He then offered a dark chuckle and shrugged his shoulders. “I guess it doesn’t matter now.” He cleared his throat. “I’m sure Erica has drawn some conclusions about how I’m related to her, but she’s wrong. I had no idea, no reason to believe, that Burt Hummel was not my biological father – until Edmund Grey told me otherwise."

Erica stared.

“So it’s through your mother that you and Erica are related?” Livia asked. She blinked and then held up her hands in surrender. “Sorry, Your Honor.”

“It’s a reasonable question,” he allowed.

“Yes,” Kurt said. “My mother, Suzanne Delacroix, was Erica’s sister.” His gaze swung toward the woman in question for the first time. “That was another reason I stayed away. I know about your sister Silver, both her and the impostor, and didn’t want to put you through that a second time. You’ve been through enough.”

Erica stood. “Please, Your Honor, I have to ask …”

The judge sighed and nodded.

“No,” Kurt interrupted, “my mother never knew about you, or that her father was also yours. Katrine would have taken that secret to her grave had my father not died. I received her letter after she passed. As I said, I was in college at the time and she never told me she was sick. She knew I would have left school to be with her in Paris.

“She wrote that she didn’t want me to be alone. She wanted to give me a family because all of mine had been taken away. I don’t believe she told anyone else, other than her husband. He loved my mother and raised her as his own.”

“Then … my father …” Erica murmured. She blanched as Kurt turned away. “Oh, god.” She collapsed into her seat.

“Eric Kane cursed this family,” Kurt spat. “He destroyed your mother with his numerous infidelities, including those which resulted in Mark and Silver. He sold you to a pedophile for a directing job. When the work here dried up, he went to France. My grandmother was a known patron of the arts, and he went to her to solicit work. When she refused him, he raped her. She told her husband, who ran Eric out of France, threatening to kill him.

“Rape is the legacy of our family. Erica, Bianca, and I were raped. My mother and Kendall were the products of rape.” He looked at Bianca, and then Kendall, and finally, to Erica. “How could I bring even more pain to you? How could I allow this man to hurt you even more?”

He shook his head in anger. “And then Edmund approached me. I had been researching the Marick family because I was interested in purchasing Wildwind. The deeper I dug, I discovered there had once been an alliance between the Valois and Marick families during the Middle Ages. I wanted to see if there were historical records about the alliance, just to satisfy my own curiosity, and my investigation had been noticed by Edmund. He had noticed some resemblance between me and other members of the family. Initially, he believed I was after money.

“He was helpful at first, whatever his motivation. He made it clear he would never sell the estate, which was fine. He wasn’t truly interested in the history of the family, given how poorly he had been treated by it, but he did find a marital record between members of our families during the sixteenth century.”

Kurt paused. “I don’t know _why_ he did it. He never really explained. Maybe he really _was_ just curious, maybe he …” He shook his head. “He took a bottle of water I had thrown in the trash and sent it for a DNA analysis. The results were conclusive. Burt Hummel wasn’t my biological father, but Dimitri Marick was.”

Maria gasped, as did Erica.

“I don’t know why he told me,” Kurt continued. “Dimitri is dead. He can never be a father to me and perhaps he wouldn’t have wanted to be regardless. Edmund felt badly about his deception, but I really wish he had kept it to himself. I’d already lost my father. Now I must lose him again, along with one I’ll never know.”

He looked up at the judge. “I didn’t kill Edmund. I don’t know who did. I don’t know what the prosecution thought would come of this, but I have never had any contact with Zach Slater. I did not kill Michael Cambias. I am more than willing to submit to a polygraph. At the time of both murders, I was working. I can prove that.”

The judge nodded. “I am so terribly sorry you have been subjected to this, Dr. Hummel, and though I played a part in laying your secrets bare, I hope you may find some measure of relief from no longer carrying burdens which were never yours.

“Court is adjourned. We will meet again in three days. Mrs. Cudahy, I wish to see you in chambers. A representative from the District Attorney’s office should be with us presently. Good day.”

* * *

“I’m so sorry,” Zach whispered. “Truly.”

“It’s not your fault, Mr. Slater,” Kurt said, mustering as much dignity as he could. “Between you and I, I think we have both been the victims of an overzealous prosecution.”

“You don’t believe I killed Edmund?”

“Well, I don’t know. Did you?”

“No,” Zach said after a long moment.

“I believe you.”

“Just like that?”

“I’m an excellent judge of people, Mr. Slater. That’s why I don’t like any of them.”

Zach chuckled.

“I wish you luck, Mr. Slater.” Kurt walked through the gate into the galley, unsurprised to find a tearful Erica, Bianca, Kendall, and Ethan waiting for him. He looked to the right and saw Maria waiting to question him. Tad Martin, Jackson Montgomery, and Ryan Lavery looked similarly inclined.

“I can’t do this,” he said, walking past them and out the door.

“We have to go after him!” Erica barked.

“No, Mom,” Bianca said quietly, placing a restraining hand on her mother’s shoulder. “He needs time. Let him be.”

“He’s our family, Binx,” Kendall pressed.

“And I don’t think he ever would have told us had he not been subpoenaed. He’s been alone most of his life, Kendall. I don’t think he’s ready to have us invade it just yet.”

“You believe him?” Tad asked.

“He has no reason to lie,” Bianca said. “I watched him on the stand. He was telling the truth. He’ll come to us when he’s ready.”


	2. Meet and Greets

Almost three weeks had passed since he gave testimony in the Edmund Grey murder trial.

Kurt suspected he wouldn’t be left alone for long, and he was right. He should have counted that the news, both tabloid and not, would find out his identity and relationship to the legendary Erica Kane, but he honestly hadn’t expected it to be the lead story _the next day_.

But when he went to grab his newspaper the following morning, there it was. He didn’t think anything would be more surreal than looking down at a newspaper only to see his own face staring back at him. He didn’t care for the picture at all. Of course, the scummy reporter ran with one in which he was crying, his eyes red and face blotchy.

He was contemplating legal action. At least he looked thin.

The phone calls and texts started almost immediately. He thought about changing his number, but it was a very involved process. His bills were automated and could be dealt with via online portals, but he used his phone for almost everything, and he had apparently given his number to more people than he realized. He should have changed it ages ago but rocking even small boats gave him anxiety. Now, it felt like he was aboard the _Titanic_.

The only calls he took were from Finn, Brittany, and Santana. They, and Quinn, were the four who had always stood by him, and who he trusted to do so now. He texted messages of thanks to the rest of New Directions for their support, and did the same with Schuester, Pillsbury, and Sylvester. He didn’t bother with acquaintances from college and medical school, for they were just that: acquaintances. That they were only contacting him now was reason enough to ignore them.

Finn left a predictable message, ranting and raving about the secrets Kurt had kept, before pulling himself together and declaring that he and Kurt would always be brothers and Burt would always be their father. Kurt returned the call and they both cried. It was weird, and Kurt didn’t like it, but he loved Finn and always would. Finn was outraged and devastated that he had never known about the rape, but respected Kurt didn’t want to discuss it.

Brittany was finishing her doctorate in psychology and did her best not to slip into jargon. She counseled Kurt, but as a friend and not a provider, begging him to at least speak with Erica and her daughters. It was entirely possible he had a family waiting to welcome him, and he should seize the opportunity now. He promised to think on her words, and he would, but he wasn’t willing to commit himself to anything just yet.

She didn’t bring up the rape, and Kurt knew it was because she was too furious with him for never telling her. The reason he never did was because Brittany, by virtue of her character, would have forced him to deal with it. He hadn’t been ready then. He hadn’t been ready for a long time. He had eventually received counseling, and it had helped, but it was an intensely personal experience that he preferred to keep private. Enough therapy had driven home the idea that he didn’t owe anyone anything, and he had the right to do what was best for him.

Speaking with Santana was explosive, as it always was. She screamed, cried, threatened, bargained, and swore to rain sulfur down on all his enemies. She was angry for him and with him. She loved him with every fiber of her being and would until the end of time. He believed her, he told her, and he felt the same. Unlike Finn and Brittany, Santana didn’t push, didn’t poke or prod with the best of intentions. She let him say what he wanted, and when he stopped talking, she told him she loved him and hung up the phone.

Quinn was the only one who knew everything, the only one he trusted completely to keep his secrets. It wasn’t that he mistrusted the others, it was that his friendship with Quinn was complicated and unique. They told each other everything. They listened to each other, but never questioned and never counseled. They could hold entire conversations with simple glances. They instinctively knew when the other needed to talk or be left alone. They ran interference for each other with their friends.

If Kurt believed in souls, he knew Quinn would be his soulmate. He wasn’t surprised that she didn’t call or email or simply show up at his loft. She texted a heart emoji, and in that pixelated image was a wealth of love and trust and safety. It was everything he needed. He replied with same.

Thank goodness all professional calls were relayed through the hospital’s answering service. He was able to keep up with his patients while weeding out those who now wanted to be treated by the Nephew of Erica Kane.

As for Erica, she had surprised him by respecting his desire for distance. He knew she could very well learn where he lived and make some dramatic entrance. She could have shown up at the hospital and had him paged until he was forced to deal with her. She could have made comments to the press or on her television show. But she didn’t. She gave him time, which was he had asked for in an oblique manner. He appreciated that. He respected that.

Kendall and Bianca were obviously taking cues from their mother, which, from what he had heard, wasn’t always the case. Erica might have been the queen of Pine Valley, but Bianca and Kendall were known to be very independent women who made their own choices.

It was the men in their lives who sought him out.

* * *

Tad Martin had shown up with no warning, inviting himself inside and making himself at home. He then proceeded to alternate between making veiled threats and outrageous flirting. Kurt ignored the threats and participated in the flirting.

Tad was a very handsome man and Kurt had a bit of a daddy kink. Kurt sensed the flirting was just Tad’s nature, but there was also an undercurrent of interest that was somewhat thrilling.

“You’re very close with Erica, aren’t you?”

Tad stared into his eyes. “She’s one of my best friends.”

“Does she know you’re here?”

His silence spoke for itself.

Kurt sighed, stood, and excused himself. A moment later he returned and handed Tad his toothbrush. “Run another test. I’m not lying, Mr. Martin.”

“They never thought you were,” Tad replied, though he accepted the toothbrush and sealed it in a Ziploc bag he pulled from his pocket. “This is more for my peace of mind than theirs.”

Kurt offered a diffident shrug.

Tad cleared his throat and grinned. “Would you like to have dinner sometime?”

Kurt moved closer. “Just dinner, Mr. Martin?”

Tad surprised them both by blushing.

* * *

Jackson Montgomery was the next unofficial emissary, and again Kurt gleaned that he hadn’t been sent by anyone. Jackson had long ago appointed himself the protector of the Kane woman, which Kurt respected.

He also had the sexiest voice Kurt ever had the privilege to hear. Blond, and almost as tall as Ethan, Jackson cut a dashing, if imposing, figure. Still, the gentleness in that voice, the honest concern, indicated to Kurt the man meant him no harm.

“Erica would probably kill me if she knew I were here,” Jackson said, “but I’m not here for her. I’m concerned about you.”

Kurt raised a brow in surprise.

“I’m in the unique position to understand both sides. A few years ago, a woman came to town purporting to be my dead sister, Christine. My family believed she had drowned when she was just a little girl. We mourned her for decades. Then, out of the blue, arrived someone who offered equal parts hope and heartache.”

“It must have been gut-wrenching,” Kurt said quietly.

“It was, particularly because Kit Fisher, the name she had adopted, was anything but a nice person. She was an admitted con artist who had once made false accusations of rape against Tad Martin.”

Kurt’s eyes bulged. There was so much horror in that one sentence that he had no clue as to how to begin unpacking it.

Jackson looked away. “While I was waiting for the DNA test to come in, Chrissie was truly raped.”

Kurt swallowed heavily. “I’m so sorry.”

Jackson gave him a wobbly smile. “Me too. I understand what you meant when you testified about rape being a legacy in our family. My sister; Erica; Bianca. Kendall was attacked. My friend Brooke was raped, as was my late friend Natalie. When I was the District Attorney, I prosecuted many rape cases; some successfully, but most not. I’m so very sorry you had to go through it.”

Kurt was disarmed and, before he could think better of it, told Jackson his story.

“The boy who did it killed himself the next year,” Kurt quietly finished. “I … I felt sorry for him. As angry as I am for what he did to me, and as angry as I always will be, I wish he hadn’t taken his life. It didn’t make me feel better. It didn’t make me feel safer. Part of him, the worst part, will always live inside me.”

“Did you ever tell anyone?” Jackson asked, almost desperately, horrified that Kurt had kept this secret to himself and lived with it all these years.

“One person. We never discussed it. It was enough that she knew.”

“She must be an incredible woman, for you to trust her so much.”

Kurt smiled. “She is.”

Jackson nodded and exhaled. “So, what’s next for you?”

“I’m unsure. I’m considering taking a sabbatical from the hospital until the media coverage dies down. The chief of staff, Joe Martin, is willing to do whatever I need, including hiring extra security to keep the press out. I hate that it’s come to that. It’s a hospital, not a circus. As much as I love practicing medicine, I have to think of what’s best for the staff and patients.”

Jackson sighed. “I’m sorry it’s come to this.”

Kurt gave an absent nod. “May I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“Do you believe Zach Slater killed Edmund?”

“I’m not the person to ask about Zach Slater,” Jackson admitted. “I don’t like him or what he represents. Part of that is because he is a Cambias, but he’s also a dangerous man.” He sighed again. “That said, I was a prosecutor for a number of years. Looking at the evidence, or lack thereof, there’s reason to question his guilt. My heart says he did it because he’s a Cambias and they’re all evil, but my instincts tell me no.

“Let me ask you a question. You had a relationship with Ethan. Do you believe he’s capable of conceiving so great a lie?”

Kurt paused. “I don’t know,” he finally said, “but the fact that I don’t feel an immediate need to defend him suggests, to me at least, that it’s possible.”

* * *

Next was Ryan Lavery.

Kurt didn’t know anything about him other than that he was once engaged to Kendall and had some seriously crazy eyes. He looked like a man who was always on the brink of a psychotic break.

He opened his door to find those eyes boring into him. If looks could kill.

“I want to know right now what threat you pose to Kendall and Bianca,” Ryan seethed.

Kurt raised a brow, looked him up and down, and then snorted. “If I truly posed a threat to them, do you honestly believe I’d admit it? What a ridiculous question.”

Ryan blinked in surprise. “Then what is it that you want?”

“To be left alone,” Kurt snapped. “I just spent two months in Darfur trying to reverse the agonizing effects of female genital mutilation. I stepped off the plane and was immediately handed a summons to testify about my uncle’s murder, supposedly committed by a man I don’t know and have never met. I didn’t even know Edmund had died, let alone been killed.”

Ryan blinked again, obviously having forgotten that Dimitri Marick, Edmund’s brother, was Kurt’s biological father.

“You were in the courtroom, Mr. Lavery. You heard the District Attorney accuse me of conspiring with Mr. Slater to kill my uncle. Let me ask you: what would be my motive? Dimitri Marick is dead; he will never claim me as his son. I have no need of the Marick name, money, or title. I have my own name, my own title, and more money than I could ever hope to spend. Why would I want dead the only living link I had to the father I’ll never know? Do you think I enjoyed admitting my rape to complete strangers?”

Ryan stared.

“Tad Martin has already dropped by. I gave him my toothbrush to run another DNA test. It will prove that I am Erica’s nephew. If I wasn’t confident in that, I wouldn’t have bothered. I don’t need or want anything from Erica Kane or her daughters.”

“So why didn’t you tell them before?”

“Because it wasn’t any of their business until I chose to make it such. My choice was taken from me. If the judge hadn’t had the DNA test Edmund had performed, I never would have admitted it, especially in open court. Do you think I like the press frenzy surrounding me? Do you think I enjoy not being able to go to work? I spent _years_ training to practice medicine, and I’m damned good at it.

“Do you think it’s fun for me that people to whom I haven’t spoken in years are calling, texting, Tweeting, and Facebooking me out of the blue to ask if I can get them Erica Kane’s autograph? Or free swag from Fusion or Enchantment Cosmetics? Do you know how many women have tried to schedule gynecological examinations with me because they believe it would get them one step closer to Erica Kane?

“This is my life now, Mr. Lavery. I spent a decade training at some of the country’s finest institutions to be the best doctor I can possibly be, and now I have been rendered nothing more than Erica Kane’s nephew. Am I angry about that? You better believe it. Do I blame Erica for it? Of course not.”

“So why didn’t you just lie?”

Kurt stared at him. “What part of _the judge had a DNA test proving it_ do you not understand? Do you think I should have committed perjury instead? _I don’t lie, Mr. Lavery_.”

“What about Ethan?” Ryan demanded.

“What about him? We were together less than a month almost a year ago. I haven’t spoken to him since. He’s found love with Kendall and I couldn’t be happier for him.”

“And Slater? He killed your uncle.”

“Prove it.”

Ryan opened his mouth, but Kurt cut him off.

“I couldn’t care less about the pissing match you and Zach Slater are involved with over Cambias Industries. I couldn’t care less that Alexander Cambias anointed you his Chosen One and you might lose control of a company you haven’t earned because the real heir showed up. As for Mr. Slater, who you seem to resent so much, if I were you, I would ask myself why an eighteen-year-old boy would fake his own death just to get away from his father.

“Get out, and don’t come back. You won’t like what will happen if you do.”

* * *

Kurt was expecting Ethan to make an appearance and was relieved when he didn’t. He wasn’t sure if it was because of Ethan’s common sense or if Kendall had told him to stay away. Regardless, he was happy one of the few people who could cause him to become undone was not poking about.

He still loved Ethan and supposed he always would in some way, but their time together was over and there was no point in rehashing things just because some new information had come to light. Also, Kurt was very aware there was a distinct difference between Ethan Ramsey, with whom he’d had the brief but torrid affair, and Ethan Cambias, who, in Kurt’s view appeared to be almost an entirely different person.

Jackson’s earlier question somewhat haunted him. Did he really believe Ethan was lying about witnessing Zach murder Edmund?

Yes.

Kurt had looked into Zach’s eyes and Zach had looked back. Zach said he hadn’t killed Edmund, and, for whatever reason, Kurt believed him. Unfortunately, there wasn’t a winning side to choose. If Zach was lying, then he had killed Kurt’s uncle. If Ethan was lying, he had committed perjury and was deliberately and maliciously setting up his father for a jail or even a death sentence.

The Ethan whom Kurt had known and loved would never have done this, but Ethan Cambias? Perhaps Ethan had been seduced by the family fortune, or the power heading Cambias Industries had afforded. Maybe Ethan had lied for vengeance but then realized he couldn’t retract his statement without harsh penalties.

Regardless, Kurt didn’t care. He would treasure the memories of his time with Ethan but wouldn’t willfully blind himself to the fact that people can and do change. And this Ethan? The one who was willing to let a murderer go free just to deliver his father some misguided comeuppance? That was someone Kurt truly did not wish to know.

He was glad Ethan had stayed away. He hoped they wouldn’t run into each other for the foreseeable future. He honestly didn’t know what he would do or say should they meet.

* * *

There was one phone call that had taken Kurt by complete surprise, so much so that, when the caller introduced himself, Kurt was completely dumbstruck.

He knew Dimitri Marick was his biological father, but other than digging into some history of the Marick family, he wasn’t too keen on discovering more. He had never overly discussed Dimitri with Edmund, who kindly hadn’t tried to pressure him into some once-removed family bonding.

What he did know was that Dimitri and Erica had been married – twice, in fact – and that Erica had miscarried their child. He knew Dimitri had been previously married to a woman named Angelique who had been presumed dead, but later turned up very much alive. He knew that Dimitri had married Gloria Marsh, a nurse, and the union had lasted less than a year. He knew that Dimitri had later married Alexandra Devane, a physician, and moved with her to Budapest, where he later died.

What he didn’t know was that Dimitri had another illegitimate son named Anton Lang.

When Anton had called him, Kurt had no idea what to say.

He listened patiently as Anton discussed his relationship with their father, lamenting about lost time and petty squabbles which had kept them apart. He listened as Anton detailed his past relationship with Kendall Hart, but stopped him when Anton’s bitter recriminations against Kendall became too intense.

He explained that he was sure Anton’s feelings were valid, but Kendall was his cousin and he had no interest in a poisonous diatribe. Anton reluctantly begged off and they switched to other topics of conversation. The rest of said conversation was relatively light and breezy. They made tentative plan to meet in Paris the next summer.

After he hung up, Kurt thought about what had just happened. Anton was his brother, but that was just biology. He didn’t feel a connection and had no desire to force one, but it was entirely possible one might develop down the line.

At the end of the day, however, his brother was Finn Hudson.

* * *

Another week of Kurt’s self-imposed quarantine passed, yet much had happened in the outside world.

His sabbatical from Pine Valley Hospital was approved, though he elected to remain on-call in cases of emergency. Apparently there was a new gynecologist on staff, Gregory Madden. He knew Madden by reputation and published articles. He did wonder why a physician of such reputation had settled in Pine Valley. After all, Kurt had his own motives for coming here, and he suspected Madden did as well.

He debated picking up some pro-bono shifts at the clinic, but didn’t really want to deal with David, whose history with the Kane family was long, storied, and in some case, revolting.

He suddenly had far too much free time on his hands, and no idea what to do with it.

The charges against Zach Slater had been dismissed after Ethan was proven to be lying. JR Chandler was somehow involved, but Kurt didn’t know the specifics and didn’t care to know. Kendall had immediately dumped Ethan, who was fighting to win her back as he also fought to remain out of prison. Bianca had returned to Paris with her daughter Miranda but had written Kurt a letter of such heartfelt sincerity, he wept whenever he thought of it.

Erica and Kendall continued to give him space, which he appreciated, though he wondered how long it would last. Jackson had intimated that the only reason they weren’t banging down Kurt’s door was at Bianca’s insistence. Now that she had left town, he suspected his respite would soon be over.

Punctuated knocks on his front door suggested he was right. He knew it was time to suck it up and start dealing with his life.

He blew out a breath and stalked over, careful not to throw open the door and growl, very surprised to see Zach Slater looking back at him.

“Hi!” Zach chirped.

Kurt found this odd. He would never have believed a man of Zach Slater’s reputation would _chirp_ anything.

“Good morning, Mr. Slater,” Kurt said evenly.

“Call me Zach.”

Kurt considered the man for a long moment. God, that voice was even more delicious than that of Jackson Montgomery. Jack’s was husky and honeyed, but Zach’s was rumbling and raspy and oozed of sex.

Zach cut a very fine figure. He was slightly taller than Kurt, but powerfully built. Burly, even, but the cut of his clothes barely concealed just how cut that body was. The fathomless brown eyes were warm and inviting, but Kurt guessed they could turn to snapping Dobermans with little provocation. The dark brown hair was cut close, Kurt believed, to keep the curls at bay. He absently wondered what it would be like if Zach grew that hair out so Kurt could run his fingers through it.

He reined himself in quickly. Zach was almost twenty years older than him, allegedly had ties to organized crime, was a Cambias, and the father of his last lover. But the pull was there. Worse, Zach was aware of it and playing into it, though not exploitatively.

“What can I do for you, Zach?”

A filthy grin was the only response, and Kurt’s heart fluttered in his chest.

Zach suddenly turned serious. “I wanted to thank you, for your testimony.”

“There’s no reason to thank me. I didn’t do anything that resulted in your freedom.”

“I think that’s debatable, but I’m sorry that your life has been ripped to shreds simply because you told the truth.”

Kurt blinked. “Thank you.”

Zach paused. “I’m very impressed with you,” he finally said, “and I’m not easily impressed. You took the stand and told the truth. You refused to be baited or led by the Prosecution’s ridiculous version of events. You asked me to my face whether I killed Edmund, and you believed me when I said no.”

“I just told the truth.”

“At great personal risk and cost. Whether you believe it or not, your testimony did help my case. Livia thinks you created enough doubt in the judge’s mind to dismiss the charges. Thank you for that.”

“You’re welcome.”

Zach took a step closer. “I owe you, and I always pay my debts.”

“You don’t owe me anything,” Kurt insisted, taking a step back. Good lord, the man smelled good.

“Let’s agree to disagree,” Zach said cheerfully.

“All right. Now, why don’t you tell me what you really want?”

Zach smirked. “Marry me.”


	3. A Decent Proposal

Kurt tried for a completely blank face, or perhaps a bemused eyebrow. He failed utterly. He felt his mouth drop open in complete surprise, and some horrid, strangled croak emerged from his throat to herald his own body’s treachery.

Finally, after an exaggerated blink, Kurt pursed his lips and rolled his neck. “I’m sorry. There goes my trick ear again. What did you just say?”

Zach smiled and sauntered past him, looking around the loft in appreciation. It was beautiful. He had done some digging and wasn’t surprised to find out Kurt owned the entire building, which meant he was making a long-term investment in Pine Valley; otherwise, he wouldn’t have bothered. Zach loved a diversified portfolio.

The loft was originally open space, but Kurt had walls constructed to give it dimension and a sense of fluidity. Each room opened to the next in seamless transition, despite the disparate decorating schemes. Had it been an apartment building, this would be a penthouse, but it wasn’t posh or ostentatious. Kurt had retained the industrial feel while adding frankly glamorous touches that made it warm and inviting.

The loft was large enough that it appeared to be a house floating in the sky. The entire east and west walls were tempered glass, running the lengths of the space, meaning Kurt had a spectacular view of the morning sunrise over the marina, and an enchanting panoramic view of the park at sunset.

There was a small foyer that opened into the great room, which Kurt had adapted into a living room. Rustic beams and exposed pipes comprised the top of the twelve-foot ceiling. Track lighting allowed for plenty of ambient light without it being harsh or glaring, which complimented the starkness of the décor. It was almost neoclassical, but even more minimalist, a schema Zack personally enjoyed.

Everything was white, from the decadently upholstered furniture to the thick pile of the carpet. Books were stacked and scattered everywhere, in and on every available space, indicating a love of reading. They were of every genre and organized in such a way that it probably only made sense to Kurt. Stunning paintings lined the walls in strategic positions, each having a light fixed toward it, either from the ceiling or the bottom of the frame, to announce their startling natures.

“They were done by my friend, Tina,” Kurt said quietly and somewhat wistfully, obviously discomfited by having another person in his private space, yet too polite to throw them out.

“Tina Cohen-Chang?” Zach surmised, letting loose a low whistle. “I’ve followed her career. She’s remarkable, but I hadn’t realized she was so … prolific.”

In truth, Zach knew he was gazing at easily three million dollars’ worth of eclectic art. What made pieces by Cohen-Chang so collectible was that she didn’t have a commercial or even distinctive style. She painted in representational art, as well as abstract and non-objective. She was compelling precisely because she was elusive. You couldn’t tell something was her creation simply by looking it, which paradoxically made her work much sought after. Her pieces were suspenseful because they were so undefined.

It was diabolical. There should be classes.

“We grew up together,” Kurt said, inwardly pleased Zach was so knowledgeable and appreciative of his friend’s talent. “Some of these predate high school.”

Zach gave an absent not, looking to his left at an open dining room with a table for twelve, through which was the kitchen. Considering the care that went into the design, as well as the machinery on display, it was apparent Kurt enjoyed cooking. It was contemporary with a touch of farmhouse. Butcher block was used for countertops and the backsplash was red brick. The major appliances were professional grade. Zach got the impression they were purchased for use, not display.

“Mr. Slater …” Kurt began.

Zach turned to face him. “Zach.”

Kurt rolled his eyes in exasperation, causing the other man to grin. “Fine, then, _Zach_. Please repeat your inelegant demand, for it wasn’t a question, and then explain to me why I should even consider it, let alone agree.”

Zach rubbed his hands together. “Ah, negotiation!”

Kurt stared. “I cannot imagine what you think we’re negotiating for,” he hissed, an edge to his voice.

A startled Zach blinked. “Oh, no! Dr. Hummel, please, I wasn’t trying to offend you, and I certainly wasn’t trying to … to solicit you or imply in any way that you are for sale. I sincerely apologize if I that’s how I came across.”

Kurt gave him a searching look and at last nodded, closing the door and walking into the living room. He regally took a seat and indicated with a wave that Zach should follow. “Please call me Kurt, and please also explain that absurd proposal.”

Zach nodded and leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. “How aware are you of my business activities?”

“Not very,” Kurt said slowly, not about to admit he had researched the man. “I know you own the casino and hotel in town, and still have property in Vegas. It’s been suggested you’re attached to the mob, or at least have ties to it, but I don’t know how accurate that is, if it all.”

“Not very,” Zach said, “but not entirely false. I worked Vegas for almost twenty years. You can’t get anything done in that town without knowing who to ask, but I was never part of the mob. They respected me because I kept to myself and didn’t try to infringe on their turf, so they left me alone.”

It must have been one hell of a tightrope walk, Kurt mused, but he was impressed the other man had never succumbed. “This is all so very _Casino_. Am I to be Sharon Stone in this remake?”

“It was a good movie.”

“She should have gotten the Oscar,” Kurt agreed. “Okay, so you’re not a crook. You are, however, perfectly content to take people’s money when they’re too stupid not to gamble it away.”

Zach shrugged. “Pretty much.”

“Fair enough. So why are you here again?”

“Can’t I just be dazzled by you?”

Kurt fought the blush. “Many are.”

“I don’t doubt it, but brass tacks it is. You know that I was born Alexander Cambias and faked my death when I was eighteen. I recreated myself into Zach Slater, but that was never a legal identity.”

Kurt’s eyes widened, putting the pieces together. “Your liquor and gambling licenses have been revoked.”

Zach smirked, pleased with how quick Kurt really was. “Yeah, it’s temporary, but the liquor board and gaming commission don’t appear to be very motivated in completing their investigations. Meanwhile, I’m losing money. A lot of it.”

“That’s why you want to marry me,” Kurt guessed. “I can request new licenses in my name so you can get back to business. This would be a marriage of convenience; a merger.”

Zach nodded, deciding to be frank. “Correct.”

“Why me?” Kurt asked. “I’m honestly surprised you haven’t approached Kendall. She could just as easily accomplish the same task, with the bonus of getting revenge on Ethan.”

“I thought about it,” Zach admitted. “She’s a beautiful woman with many connections in Pine Valley, not to mention the fame that comes with being Erica’s daughter, but she has enough on her plate, not only with Ethan, but with Fusion.” He paused. “She also has a criminal history, and though she was exonerated of any charges against her, that won’t necessarily count for much where the local government is concerned.”

Kurt nodded. “Whereas I have an allegedly sterling character; am a respected physician, though I’m temporarily on sabbatical; no criminal history; and enough money that this could simply be construed as another investment.”

“Exactly.”

“What’s my motivation? Why should I do this for you?”

“As I said, there’s a lot of money at stake.”

“Which I don’t need,” Kurt said easily. “What else have you got?”

“Uh, the satisfaction of helping a man dire straits?” Zach tried. “Philanthropy? Community service?”

Kurt eyed him. “Is that really the best you can do?”

Zach chuckled. “All right, fair enough. There’s a lot of risk on your part for little reward. How can I sweeten the pot?”

Kurt studied him, trying to gauge just how serious he really was. “If I were to do this, there would be conditions.”

Zach held up his hands, finger splayed. “Name them.”

Kurt’s thoughts were racing faster than he could navigate them. He took a deep breath and slowly released it. “Okay. First, have Livia or your business attorneys draw up a binding document that outlines your proposal.”

“Done.”

“Second, I want an escape clause. If we do this and I’m unhappy for any reason, you will grant me an uncontested divorce. In return, I’ll agree to stay married to you for as long as necessary until I can transfer the licenses to you.”

“Agreed,” Zach said, moderately surprised Kurt was considering this at all, let alone with such reasonable requests.

“Third, I want my share of the profits to be split. I’m not sure whether Ryan Lavery or Ethan is responsible for purchasing a percentage of Fusion, but I want to you to circumvent that and gather enough shares to give Kendall a controlling interest. If it’s discovered how she got it, you take all the credit – or the blame. My name is never mentioned.”

Zach raised a brow. He was somewhat intrigued. Obviously, Kurt was requesting this for the sake of his cousin, even though from everything he had been able to discover, Kurt and Kendall had yet to meet. Still, he was more than happy to honor the request, if for no other reason than it would be a roundabout way of sticking it to his wayward son.

“And the rest of your share of the profits?”

“Is donated directly – and anonymously, which means no tax break for either of us – to the Miranda Center.”

Zach stared at him, only mildly shocked but very humbled. Bianca had started the Miranda Center after she believed her daughter had perished in a helicopter crash. It was dedicated to serving the low-income women and children of Pine Valley, offering daycare, aftercare, eldercare, job training and employment services, access to free healthcare, rape counseling, and advocacy with local social services. Future goals included residency programs and college tuition assistance. The Center was financed in part by Bianca and Erica but relied heavily on government grants.

It was an admirable project, and nothing that would surprise anyone who knew Bianca. Kurt’s desire to see the Center survive and thrive was, well, beautiful.

Kurt blinked. “A caveat: when Kendall is given controlling interest in Fusion, it’s contingent on her donating free product and makeover assistance to the women at the Center. Obtaining employment isn’t just about the credentials but looking the part.”

Zach leaned back and studied Kurt more carefully. This was a good man, he realized. Much had happened to him, much wrong had been done to him, but he was still a good man. Far better than Zach was, had ever been, or would ever be.

“Anything else?” he asked, for he really was curious. Nothing Kurt had requested was outrageous or even taxing. Zach knew he, and others, would get far more out of this than Kurt.

Kurt offered a tight smile. “Don’t think I’m so magnanimous. I do have other conditions.”

“All right. Declare them.”

“I want you to contest your father’s will and fight for Cambias Industries.”

“Why?” Zach snarled almost immediately.

Kurt was somewhat taken aback, as this was his first look at the dangerous man Zach Slater truly was. “Because after you take it over, I want you to ensure that at least a quarter percentage is given to Bianca and thus Miranda. Your brother Michael was a perverted bastard, and it’s the very least he owes them.”

Zach said nothing but eventually offered a short nod. In truth, he liked that Kurt was so obviously protective of Bianca, even though he didn’t know her. And he was right. There wasn’t a better scenario for Michael’s shameful legacy.

“Now for the more personal requests. I don’t necessarily want a husband, Zach, but I would like a partner.”

Zach frowned. “I need you to clarify, please.”

“I don’t want it presumed that I will be expected to perform any … husbandly duties …”

“I would never ask that of you,” interrupted an offended Zach.

Kurt held up a hand. “I never thought you would,” he said kindly. “I don’t know you well, if at all, really, but I know you’re not that kind of man.”

Zack released a breath and nodded for him to continue.

“What I do want is for everyone else to believe our marriage is an actual marriage, with everything that entails.”

Zach couldn’t understand why and said as much.

“I want your protection. I want your assurance that, in every way that matters other than sex, our marriage will operate as a true partnership. That means when the Kane women finally come for me, you run interference. That means if Ethan tries to score points with me because Kendall won’t give him the time of day, you keep him away. That means if any other man approaches me, all I have to do is point to you and know that he will never get close to me again.”

“Don’t you want to find love, Kurt?” Zach asked, sadness in his heart but not his voice.

“No. I want security. I want a companion. I want to be very, very close to someone – who will leave me alone. I want … a friend.”

Zach … had not expected this. Not in his wildest dreams. If he ever found the man who had so harmed Kurt, he would kill him with his bare hands.

“And if you desire to seek … company … during our marriage, as long as you’re discreet, I won’t …”

“No,” Zach interrupted. “If we marry, I will be faithful to you, even though it’s just business – because it’s _good_ business. I want you trust me, Kurt, and I want to make you as happy as I possibly can. Frankly, everything you’ve outlined is not only reasonable, but very attractive. I wouldn’t mind removing myself from the complications of romantic relationships for the foreseeable future.”

Kurt understood the man was still nursing a broken heart over Maria. He nodded.

“Where do you live?”

“The casino,” Zach answered.

“Then you’ll move in here.”

Zach stared.

“If people are going to believe we’re really married, we need to live together. The loft is huge; it has much more space than I need or could ever use. There are two other bedrooms from which you can choose, each with a bathroom, plus an extra room you can use for an office. Because I own the building, I can guarantee you a good parking space.”

Zach grinned. “I appreciate the offer, but I can tell how much your private space means to you. I don’t wish to intrude.”

Kurt tilted his head. “You wouldn’t be. I asked you, remember? And from what I can tell, you’re just as private as I am. I enjoy being alone, as I’m a complete person all on my own, but I don’t like being lonely, and I’ve been lonely for more years that I can count. I wouldn’t be averse to us being alone, together. Or together separately, whichever you prefer.”

“It is a beautiful place,” Zach said, looking around, “and quite lovely company.”

Kurt fought the blush. “And if there’s ever a time one of us truly needs solitude, either of us can stay at the casino, right?”

“Absolutely.”

Kurt stood. “So have your lawyers draw up the contract and tell me where you want to register.”

Zach also stood and they shook hands; he marveled at the softness of Kurt’s skin. He shook his head slightly to clear it. “When do you want to start telling people? _What_ do you want to tell them?”

“That’s the question,” Kurt replied, the light dimming in his eyes. “I can already guess what some people will say, considering my last quasi-relationship was with your son.”

“Do you really care what people say?”

Kurt smiled. “No, but they will talk, about both of us.”

Zach shrugged. “Let them. If we’re the biggest concern of their small minds, they really need to get lives of their own.”

Kurt’s smile grew. “Okay.”

“So, we’re doing this?”

“I’m keeping my name,” Kurt warned. “It’s almost all I have left of my father.”

Zach envied Kurt that relationship. His own father had been a scorpion. “No worries.”

Kurt bit his lip. “I would prefer that when Ethan does find out, it’s in a public place.”

Zach turned frigid. “Do you believe he would hurt you? I won’t allow that.”

“He wouldn’t intentionally hurt me, but let’s be honest, Zach. Even though Ethan and I haven’t been together in a year, don’t you imagine he’ll feel somewhat cuckolded? Especially since you’re his father and he and Kendall are no longer together.”

“Do you want me to tell him?”

“I’d prefer we both tell him, just to make it clear that this isn’t some grand deception, because that is what he’ll assume. That’s what _many_ will assume.” He paused. “Perhaps we could engineer it so that Maria is also there?”

Zach stilled. “That … would be a relief, yes.”

“Well, look at us! Already working together like a married couple.”

* * *

Tad had agreed to meet with Erica and Kendall at the former’s penthouse. It had taken less than a week for the DNA results to be returned, and he trusted the lab, so it would provide a definitive answer. He hadn’t told Erica he was running another test, knowing she would declaim it as unnecessary. She was already enamored with Dr. Hummel and had no problem saying so.

Still, he wanted to be thorough. Erica was a very intelligent woman, but ever since she had repaired her relationship with Kendall and Bianca had moved to Paris, her heart was much more open than it had been previous, which also meant she left herself open for a world of hurt.

He expected the test to show Dr. Hummel was indeed her nephew, however. He had managed to unearth supplemental information; what little there was confirmed Dr. Hummel had been nothing but truthful in his testimony.

He supposed he was wary because of Dr. Hummel’s past relationships with Ethan Cambias and David Hayward. Even though Hayward had been nothing but a supervising physician, Tad distrusted everything the man did on principle.

He knocked on the door and waited for Erica’s telltale delicate footsteps to announce her. She opened the door and smiled, turning her face so that he could bend down and kiss her cheek, which he did with relish. Sometimes he was surprised he and Erica had never gotten together. They were terrific friends and rather carnal people. He supposed they both realized they would ruin their friendship were they to try.

She ushered him inside, upon which a nervous Kendall rose to her feet and greeted him. “What have you found out?”

“Straight to the point,” Tad said. “I like it.”

He crossed to the armchair and sat down. Kendall and Erica quickly followed suit on the couch.

He opened his messenger bag and withdrew a few thin file folders. “From everything I’ve studied, Dr. Hummel was completely honest in his testimony.”

Erica gave an imperious nod. She had expected nothing less.

Tad opened the first folder. “Here's a copy of his birth certificate. He was born at St. Rita’s Hospital in Lima, Ohio, in Allen County. He was a month premature, but experienced no real problems except for delayed growth, which is common in preemies.”

“He seems normal-sized,” Kendall said.

He nodded. “He finally leveled out at about five-ten during college. Until then, he was, well, petite, I guess you could say, and very thin. Much like you, Erica.”

She rolled her eyes with a fond smile. “Tad, we both know I love compliments, especially about my trim figure, but get on with it.”

He grinned. “His parents, as far as he knew, were Burt Hummel and Suzanne Delacroix, who was indeed the daughter of Katrine Valois.”

Erica bit her lip and looked away. “After all of the horrible things my father has committed, why am I surprised he resorted to rape?”

Kendall took her hand. “You loved him once. You wanted to believe the best of him. It’s not your fault, Mom.”

A tearful Erica nodded and patted her daughter’s hand.

“I couldn’t confirm the rape,” Tad said, voice almost breaking on that vile word, “but at the time Suzanne was conceived, I was able to verify Eric Kane was in Paris in search of work, and … there’s no delicate way to say this, a hit was put out on him by Sebastian Delacroix, Katrine’s husband.”

“Too bad it was unsuccessful,” Erica sniped. She closed her eyes. “I am so thankful my mother didn’t live to see this. She knew he was awful – I wouldn’t listen, of course – but I don’t think she ever would have expected this.”

“When you say a hit …” Kendall said, trailing off.

Tad nodded. “Sebastian Delacroix has quite a history. His family, like that of his wife, was one of the few ennobled to survive the French Revolution. They lost most of their wealth during the reign of Napoleon but managed to hang on to their land. So, land-rich but cash-poor. It was a scandal when Katrine Valois agreed to marry him, as her social status was several levels above his.”

“Did they remain married?” Erica asked.

“Yes, until his death in the early eighties. Everything points to it being a happy and loving marriage, despite what was done to Katrine.”

“Say it, Tad,” Erica snapped.

He sighed. “Her rape.”

She nodded.

“The Valois family, as you know, was renowned. Katrine was the last of her line, as Suzanne predeceased her; that is, except for Kurt. They very much believed in _noblesse oblige_ ; Katrine raised hundreds of millions of dollars for charity and sat on the boards of the most vaunted European philanthropic organizations. Sebastian was allegedly a financier, but when I investigated the records, they were scant. It’s assumed he had ties to _les beaux voyous_ , the Paris mob. It’s entirely possible he had the resources to put out a contract on your father.”

Erica’s lips thinned. She had already said her peace on that.

“Suzanne grew up in Paris and her childhood was a happy one. Her parents loved her thoroughly and doted on her. Her elementary education was completed in Paris; when she was twelve, she was sent to a Swiss boarding school where she met her best friend, who also became Kurt’s godmother.”

He stared at each in turn. “Get ready for your socks to be knocked off.”

Erica raised a cool brow.

“Olivia Pope.”

She stared.

“Holy shit,” Kendall murmured.

“Little is known about her relationship with Kurt,” Tad continued. “They’ve never been photographed together, but Kurt visited DC often to see his aunt, so it’s more than possible he was visiting Pope, as well.”

“I beg your pardon,” Erica said. “His aunt? Who is this person? Burt Hummel’s sister?”

He shook his head. “Burt was an only child whose parents passed in his early twenties, before he even met Suzanne. This information isn’t well-known, but it also wasn’t difficult to find.”

He gathered a breath. “Sebastian Delacroix had an affair with an American exchange student shortly after Suzanne’s birth, which resulted in pregnancy. The mother in question didn’t tell him about the child until after she had given birth and married her college sweetheart. I haven’t been able to find that Delacroix and this illegitimate daughter even had contact, let alone met.”

“But you know who she is,” Kendall guessed.

“Her name is Dr. Camille Saroyan, the Chief of the Medicolegal Division of the Jeffersonian.”

Kendall blinked. “Are you fucking kidding me? First Olivia Pope, and now this?”

Tad raised his eyes. “There’s more.”

Erica covered her eyes. “How can there possibly be more?”

“Seems like Sebastian couldn’t keep it in his pants, despite how much he loved his wife. He came to the US shortly before his death, probably to check up on Saroyan from the shadows, and had – you guessed it – another affair which resulted in yet another illegitimate child, this time a son. His name is Blake Moran, and he’s the Administrative Assistant to Elizabeth McCord.”

“Oh, the Secretary of State,” Erica said with dripping sarcasm.

“That would be the one,” Tad agreed. “I did reach out to both Saroyan and Moran, and was politely told to back off. Three hours later, I had the FBI and Secret Service outside my door. They made vague threats and then left. Aidan was unamused.”

“Kurt said he didn’t have other family,” Kendall barked.

“There’s no way of knowing how close he is to Saroyan or Moran, but they’re obviously protective of him. Strictly speaking, however, they’re not his family. He is of no blood relation to them. They’re Sebastian’s children, not Katrine’s.”

“Kurt is looking for a biological connection,” Erica said softly, “something of his mother to which he can hold on.”

“I believe so, yes.”

She cleared her throat. “And what of Suzanne, my sister?”

Tad paused, worried how attached Erica had obviously become to this tale, and frankly despaired any pain that might develop from it down the road. “After graduating from boarding school, Suzanne enrolled at Oberlin College as a double-major in piano and voice, with a focus on education. I couldn’t find any evidence she’d ever taught in a school, but it’s possible she had private students. That’s something I can look further into, if you’re interested.”

Erica blinked and shook her head. “Bianca is the only one in our family who can sing, so Suzanne may have gotten it from her mother or my father. What else do you know about her?”

“She met Burt when her car broke down on the side of a road on her way back from a recital in Columbus. He was the tow truck driver. Apparently, it was love at first sight. We can only assume she was already pregnant by Dimitri. I haven't been able to tie them together, so I don't know when they met or why, but given the timeline - which is spotty because Kurt was pre-mature - Suzanne most likely never knew she was pregnant when she met Burt. It's entirely possible - in fact, probable - that both Burt and Suzanne believed him to be the father.

"Burt wasn’t a gold digger; he apparently had no idea about her wealth, and he supported the family fully. They were blissfully in love for their entire marriage, adored Kurt, and were desperately happy about the new baby. Kurt, as I said, had been premature, and Suzanne was told she couldn’t carry another child. Then she lost the baby and they found the cancer.”

Tad paused and dropped his eyes. “She was gone less than two months later. Kurt never got over it and, from what I’ve gathered, never will. They were extremely close, bordering on codependent, and while Kurt and Burt loved each other, there was strife in their relationship.”

Kendall narrowed her eyes. “Where are you getting all this from? Kurt came across as a very private person.”

“Her name is Rachel Berry. They were in the same glee club in high school, and she’s married to Kurt’s stepbrother, Finn Hudson. I’m taking everything she said with a grain of salt, however. She claims to have been Kurt’s best friend in high school, but comes across more as a stalker.”

“Stepbrother?” Erica blurted.

Tad nodded. “Burt had been seeing a woman in the last year of his life. Her name is Carole Hudson, and her son is Finn. Finn’s father was killed in the first Gulf War. Burt married Carole on his deathbed, hoping Carole, Finn, and Kurt would be a family after he was gone. Carole still lives in Ohio; Finn and Rachel on Long Island with their kids. Apparently, Kurt provides a generous stipend to Carole. Rachel deeply resents the same wasn’t offered to Finn, but I get the sense Finn wouldn’t have taken money from the man he insists is his true brother.”

“But Kurt said he became an emancipated minor upon his dad’s death,” Kendall argued.

“Which is true,” Tad agreed, passing her a copy of the court documents. “The motion was prepared by Olivia Pope at Kurt’s instigation. Presumably, he could have gone to live with her, Saroyan, or Moran. Only Kurt has those answers. As for why he didn’t stay in Ohio, he had already received Early Decision at Brown and probably just wanted to get away from the house where his parents died.”

“I don’t blame him,” Erica said softly. “It must have been awful. I still can’t drive by Mother’s house all these years later.”

Kendall placed her hand on her mother’s arm. They all missed Mona.

“Finn stayed in Lima and went to college at the state campus in Columbus, where he got a degree in physical education. He married Rachel right out of high school, and they have two children: a girl, Cosette, and a boy, Caleb.”

He paused. “I could tell even over the phone that Rachel is quite bitter Kurt didn’t remain in contact with them. Well, she said _them_ , but I think she meant her specifically. She reluctantly admitted Kurt and Finn are in contact with each other, and Kurt set up trusts for their children, but she hasn’t seen him since high school.”

“Sounds like a loon,” Kendall said, “or Greenlee. What else do you know about Kurt?”

“He was a stellar student,” Tad said. “He never had anything lower than an A in any class. His IQ is well into the one-seventies, and it’s been speculated he has an eidetic memory.”

“What's that mean?”

“He can recall everything he has ever seen, read, touched, tasted, or heard.”

Her eyes widened to salad plates. "Okay. _Wow._ "

Erica shrugged. “It may have helped him with school, but he did the work himself. He earned his grades. Brown is an excellent institution, so it’s no surprise he did well, especially if he was admitted early.”

Tad nodded. “He earned a full-ride based on merit alone, but turned it down. He was more than capable of paying the tuition and said the money would be of more use to someone who couldn't. I was told by one of his advisers that Kurt was heavily courted by Harvard, which was more interested in trading on his mother's name than in him. He was also a National Merit Scholar, was ten points shy of a perfect SAT score, and received numerous awards for academics. He's fluent in six languages, intermediate in two others, and can read and write Latin and Greek.”

“ _Six?_ ” Kendall trilled.

“French, obviously; probably taught to him by his mother. German; his father was descended from German immigrants; and Italian, Russian, Portuguese, and Czech. He has working knowledge of Mandarin and Korean, the latter probably taught to him by one of childhood best friends, the artist Tina Cohen-Chang.”

Erica raised an impressed brow.

“He was on the football team of his high school very briefly, winning them their only game, and resigned quickly thereafter. Rachel believes it was because of homophobia, that the other players didn’t want Kurt in the locker room, but also suggested they were humiliated he had won them their only game when they had done nothing but give him grief. He was also in the glee club and plays piano at a mastery level.”

“Like Suzanne,” Erica whispered.

Tad hesitated. “Would you like to see a picture of her?” he finally asked.

Erica nodded, tears in her eyes. “Very much, please.”

He passed over a copy of a family portrait that appeared in Suzanne’s obituary.

“Oh, how lovely she was,” Erica said sadly. “She was so young.” She shook her head in despair. “My own sister, and I’ll never know her.”

Kendall felt so badly for her mother. She couldn’t even imagine her life without Bianca.

“And Burt?” Erica asked, clearing her throat. “He was very handsome. What did he do?”

“He owned a chain of local auto repair shops,” Tad said. “He was successful. Apparently, Kurt also worked in the shop, becoming a licensed mechanic when he was only fourteen.”

“Wow,” Kendall murmured.

“According to Rachel – and, again, I’d take it with a grain of salt – Kurt practically ran the house after his mother died. He cooked, cleaned, did the laundry, took care of the lawn, and paid the household bills out of his own checking account, which he’d had since he was ten, though his father was a cosignatory.”

“So, he had to grow up very quickly,” Erica surmised, “and tried his best to fill his mother’s shoes.”

“What about the rape?” Kendall demanded.

Tad took in a deep breath. “There’s not a lot of information,” he admitted. “Rachel never knew about it and found out only through the media. She was devastated and enraged; I think mostly with herself. She feels terrible she never saw the signs or got the chance to help him. She speculated on who had done it, a boy named David Karofsky, who killed himself the next year. He had bullied Kurt badly throughout middle and high school – and when I say badly, I mean daily beatings.”

“Dear god,” Erica groaned. That was exactly what had terrified her when Bianca came out, that one day she might receive a call telling her that her child was dead simply because she was gay.

“In his sophomore year,” Tad continued, “Kurt led the glee club to a national victory. He was also the cheerleading captain, and led that team to a national victory, as well.”

He passed more pictures to Erica, candid shots taken of Kurt at the events. There was a sudden knock on the door, and Kendall rose to answer it, returning shortly with Opal and Palmer Cortlandt.

“Erica, honey,” Opal drawled in her thick Southern accent, “how are you holding up?”

“What is this nonsense about a nephew?” demanded a surly Palmer.

Opal and Palmer were her best friends, but Erica really wasn’t in the mood to deal with their questions and concerns, no matter how well-intentioned. She was so grateful Kendall took the reins and summarized what they knew, both from Kurt’s testimony and Tad’s report.

“How do we know the DNA test was accurate?” Palmer barked. not about to let anyone take advantage of Erica.

“Because I repeated it,” Tad said, holding up the letter from the envelope he had just opened. “There’s no doubt. Erica is Kurt’s maternal aunt.”

Palmer grunted and said nothing.

“Where did you get a sample to test against?” asked a suspicious Erica. “I didn’t ask you to rerun the test.”

Tad shrugged. “I went to his apartment. He volunteered his toothbrush.”

“I did _not_ ask you to make contact with him, Tad,” Erica said sharply.

“I wasn’t going to follow him around town and hope he discarded another water bottle, Erica,” Tad replied. “I figured he’d appreciate the honesty, and he did. Like I said, he volunteered the toothbrush and told me to run the test. I never asked him. That told me he was confident in his assertion.”

“Where does he live?” Kendall asked.

“He bought the old Sheffield building, after it was converted into residential space.”

“Bah!” Palmer shouted. “I wondered who had outbid me. At least Chandler didn’t get it. So, this nephew really has money, then?”

“Over twenty billion dollars, yeah,” said a wry Tad, “as well as the title of Duke of Aquitaine, though it’s mostly ceremonial. He has a chateau in Pau, a beach house in Nice, and flats in Bordeaux and Paris. He’s also a silent partner in a few wineries. Let me tell you, after running Orsini Vineyards, I can say with certainty his grapes produce some of the best wines in the world.”

Opal whistled. “Whoa,” she said lowly. “I guess that means he won’t be running to Erica for candy money.”

“Oh, Opal, really!” said an exasperated Erica.

“And I wasn’t the only one to pay him a visit,” Tad added. “I staked out his apartment for the next few hours. Jack and then Ryan also dropped by.”

Erica and Kendall glared. “What.”


	4. Family Bonding

Kurt had spent longer than necessary packing up his office at the hospital. It could have been done in less than twenty minutes, considering he hadn’t done much to personalize it.

His emotions were very mixed. He had worked so hard to get here, to become not only a doctor, but one whose reputation was well on its way to preceding itself. Now, he was preparing not only to relinquish it for an unspecified period, but to become essentially a house husband.

His patients would be fine; there were other gynecologists on staff, good ones, who were very accommodating and more than happy to assume temporary care of his patients. He hadn’t been on staff long enough to build up a large practice, and he would keep his privileges in order to perform any advanced surgeries required.

What he didn’t understand is why he wasn’t more upset.

He had spent the last dozen years working his ass off for this, yet he was letting it go so easily. His life, for so long, had been school and work. There had been no romance, save his brief affair with Ethan. No fun. No vacations or time spent with friends.

What was he going to do now?

It wasn’t as though he didn’t have options. He had more money than he knew what to do with. He didn’t necessarily have to be a doctor to promote women’s health. He could start a non-profit, do consulting work, maybe earn a degree in policy. He knew how fortunate he was that the world was open to him; he had the resources to help make an enormous impact.

Why did he feel so beholden to a vow he had made on his mother’s deathbed when he was six years old? He had set a challenge for himself and met it; wasn’t that enough? Wouldn’t his mother have wanted him to be happy?

He didn’t know what happiness was, other than that he had yet to truly experience it. He didn’t know if he could be happy with Zach, but he also wasn’t planning on falling in love with the man. If anything, Zach was to be a distraction to keep romance at bay. And yet … he liked Zach. He didn’t know much, if anything, about him, and that was somewhat alluring.

He had grown up so isolated by virtue of the nature of Lima. He had known everyone, and they had known him, for better or worse, since he was a child. Some of his friendships from that time were among the most important of his life, yet he kept himself removed from them to varying degrees.

He had moved to Pine Valley to be close to Erica and her daughters but had done nothing to form relationships with them. Part of that, he knew, was fear of rejection; fear of opening himself up to the potential for pain. But wasn’t that what life was? You couldn’t know hope without loss, or love without risk. Long ago he had sealed himself in a cocoon and had been stagnating ever since. He had never been hurt after Karofsky, but he had also never known joy.

He stared at the medical diploma in his hands. All that work, all that preparation, and for what? He felt so empty. Had he wanted to become a doctor, or was that what he believed his mother had wanted for him? His father hadn’t discouraged the pursuit but had constantly asked Kurt what he did besides study.

After his father died and he had left Lima, he stopped singing. He had continued his lessons, almost by rote, but they were self-guided. He didn’t have the interest or conviction to find a teacher. He had stopped performing. Now he only played piano to relieve boredom, and his desire to sing along to his own accompaniment had dwindled to nothing.

Singing had once been so important to him, so affirming. It wasn’t that he loved it any less, but it just seemed so frivolous. How could something that had brought him such joy be frivolous?

He slowly placed the diploma in the box and looked around the office, finally settling on the mirror hanging upon the opposite wall. He stared at his reflection.

“Who are you?”

* * *

He decided to cut through the sunroom toward the staff elevators, nodding greetings to colleagues he had never really bothered to get to know.

He was embarrassed by that now. What must they have thought of him? In truth, he didn’t much care what people thought about him, but the idea he might of come across as dismissive or unapproachable or, heaven forbid, _rude_ galled him.

It was one thing to be reserved; it was something else entirely to be an asshole.

He was frowning in consternation with himself when he was suddenly met with Erica and Kendall, who immediately stopped speaking with each other to stare at him. Unlike the Prada suit he had worn on the stand, with hair moussed to perfection, he was now dressed in jeans, a long-sleeved henley, and sneakers. His hair was floppy. He looked fifteen years old.

He stared in return. It was like some bizarre Mexican standoff, with great clothes and sharp wits. Well, great clothes for them. He imagined he looked like a troglodyte.

“Thank god this isn’t awkward,” Kendall snarked.

Kurt’s lips twitched and, to keep from laughing, he pressed them firmly together. The result was an indelicate snort. He was appalled. Kendall snorted herself and rolled her eyes in what he hoped was amusement. Erica just smiled at him.

“Please don’t let us stop you, Kurt,” she said kindly. “If and when you’re ready to talk, we’ll be here.”

He blinked. “I think I’m ready now,” he said, surprising himself.

Her expression became guarded. “Are you sure? We didn’t know you’d be here, Kurt, and the last thing I want is for you to feel ambushed. We’re more than happy to do this on your terms.”

Kendall nodded. “We’re just sorry you’ve had to go through this,” she said with some heat. “I know what it’s like when the press makes your life into a circus.”

“But none of that is your fault,” Kurt replied. “I don’t hold you responsible. It’s just that … I had never planned on actually … meeting you. I find myself at a loss for words, which never happens.”

“Runs in the family,” Kendall joked.

He smiled.

“How are you doing?” Erica asked. “Really?”

“I’m … okay,” he said. “I really am. This was unexpected, but I find myself not nearly as upset about it as I thought I’d be.”

“Joe told me you’ve taken a sabbatical?”

He nodded. “For so long, I had my life meticulously planned. I set goals and met them, then set new ones. I don’t like change, it makes me anxious, but this experience has made me … contemplative, I guess. I’ve been thinking about what I want out of life and reached the conclusion that it might not be this. It’s scary, but it’s also liberating.”

“Can you sit for a moment and talk?”

He ducked his head and nodded, blushing. He placed his box on the floor and sat down. Kendall and Erica did the same.

“I have to apologize,” he began. “I wish our introduction had been under better circumstances.”

“Don’t apologize for telling the truth,” Erica said. “I’m just sorry you had to speak about such things before you were ready.”

He shook his head. “I don’t know if there would ever have been a right time. I had become so comfortable in my denial, perhaps it’s better I was compelled to deal with things rather than continuing to let them fester.”

“Why didn’t you come to us before?” Kendall asked gently.

He gave a nervous shrug and looked away. “I guess I thought …” He blew out a breath. “I was afraid,” he admitted. “I was scared to open myself up to a possibility for which I’d only hoped. What I said on the stand was true. There’s nothing I can do for you. I have nothing to offer.”

“Of course you do,” Erica said. “You have yourself to offer.”

He twisted his hands. “Why would you want to know me?” he whispered.

“Because you’re our family,” Kendall said. “As you know, there’s not a lot of us. Like you, I grew up as an outsider. Binx was kept from Mother from years.”

“And I was consumed by an abandonment complex so severe, it blinded me to the despicable man my father truly was,” Erica said. “None of that changes the fact that we wish to know you because of the incredible man you are, not just because of biology.”

He raised startled eyes and looked at her. He saw nothing reflected at him but kindness and curiosity. “Thank you,” he murmured.

Kendall straightened her shoulders and nodded. “In the interest of full disclosure, you should know we had you investigated.”

“Kendall!” Erica groaned.

“Well, it’s not like he doesn’t know!”

Kurt smiled. “I put it together when Tad Martin appeared on my doorstep.”

“I apologize for that,” Erica said. “I told him not to make contact with you, to rush you before you were ready, and I certainly never asked him to have another DNA test performed!”

“I wasn’t offended,” Kurt said. “I offered my toothbrush; Tad didn’t ask. He told me it was more for his peace of mind than yours. I certainly don’t blame you for checking my background.” He shrugged. “I’d do the same. In fact, I did.”

Kendall nodded, smirking, pleased her new cousin wasn’t naïve or a milquetoast.

“There are some things Tad told us …” Erica hedged.

“Did he tell you he asked me out?”

She stared. “He did what!” she finally trilled.

“Woof!” Kendall shouted, grinning. “Did you accept?”

“Kendall!”

“What? Tad’s hot!”

Kurt laughed. “He is, and I did not accept. When I asked if he was looking for more than just dinner, he tucked tail and left.” He heaved a dramatic sigh. “I guess some mountains are so majestic, even brave men dare not approach.”

Kendall hooted. Erica blushed.

“You can ask me about what he told you,” he said. “I won’t lie.”

Kendall studied him for a moment. “I believe you tell the truth as a matter of course.”

He nodded.

“Did Suzanne know she was my sister?” Erica whispered.

“No,” he said softly. “Katrine never told her, probably in a bid to protect her. Please know what I’m about to say is no reflection on you, Erica, but I imagine she wished to spare my mother the knowledge of how she was conceived, so what happened to Kendall wouldn’t happen to her.”

Kendall swallowed heavily and nodded, taking her mother’s hand. “It will always hurt,” she said, “knowing you’re only here because of an act of violence. I’m glad your mother never had to experience it.”

Erica cleared her throat. “I understand Jackson also came to see you. Please know that was also without my authorization. He also refused to tell me what you discussed.”

“We mostly discussed his sister, Christine.”

She hitched a breath and nodded. “I don’t think he’ll ever get over that. He feels he failed her so badly.”

“Rape destroys more than just the victim,” he acknowledged. “You and I both know that it’s our story, our loss, but we also know how it impacts those we love. That’s why I never told my father. It was to spare him, not because it was easier for me.”

She nodded. “My mother. She felt so guilty for what was done to me, even though it wasn’t her fault and there was nothing she could have done to stop it. In some ways, her guilt was almost more than I could bear.”

“Did you ever tell anyone?” Kendall asked.

“One person,” Kurt said, “but not until years after it happened. We never talked about it, and that was at my instigation. She would have listened had I wanted, but I didn’t. It was enough that she knew.”

“Must be a hell of a girl.”

He smiled. “She is. Her name is Quinn. I guess you could say she’s my Bianca.”

“Then you’re very lucky.”

“I know.”

“What about your dad,” she asked. “Did he know that you weren’t …” she trailed off.

“Neither of my parents knew Dimitri was my biological father. Had my mother known, she would have told my dad or left me an admission. In every way that matters, Burt Hummel was my father. I don’t know anything about Dimitri other than what I’ve read, but even were he still alive, he would never be my father.”

Both women realized and respected the topic was now closed to further discussion.

“You might want to do something about your sister-in-law,” Kendall advised. “What’s her name? Raquel? Loose lips sink ships.”

He scoffed. “Why am I not surprised? Her name is Rachel, but I think I’ll now refer to her as Raquel for the rest of my life.”

Kendall snickered.

“So, I gather she blathered to Tad?” He shook his head. “Rachel’s never been able to keep a secret, not that she ever knew any of mine, but I’m sure she offered wild speculation.” He shrugged. “That’s fine, it’s just who she is. I learned a long time ago that if I became offended by everything that comes out of her mouth, I’d have little time for anything else.”

Erica laughed. Kurt’s relationship with this Rachel person reminded her strongly of her own with Brooke English. Maybe everyone needed a nemesis. Still, at the end of the day, if Brooke ever truly needed her help, she would offer it without reservation and knew Brooke would do the same. They had before, after all. She suspected the same was true of Kurt and Rachel.

“I think the only reason she spoke to Tad at all was because she was so blindsided by what she read in the paper,” Erica suggested.

He winced. “Yes, that’s probably true. If you know about Rachel, then you know about my brother Finn. The voicemail he left me when he found out about the rape … I was truly scared about what he would do. His was one of the only calls I returned, just because I was worried how he would react to all of this.”

“How did he react?” Kendall asked.

“Better than I expected. Surprisingly he was unbothered by the family revelations. He and I decided long ago that we were brothers by choice, not blood, and that hasn’t changed. As for the rape, well, he knew better than most how David had tormented me in high school, so of course Finn’s guilt is almost insurmountable. He had sworn to protect me, but he failed often. That had everything to do with him being sixteen, and nothing to do with him not loving me.

“I think Finn believed, as most did, that I would handle it myself, because I always had. I never let on that David’s abuse got progressively worse. Maybe if I had … well, speculation changes nothing. What I failed to understand is that when Finn finally learned the truth, he would approach it as a father, not my brother. He saw his own children in place of me, and what he perceives as his inaction will haunt him for the rest of his life, regardless of my absolution.”

He sighed. “My relationship with Finn is terribly complicated, but I love him dearly, as he does me. We both know how much we mean to each other. That’s enough for me, but he has to decide that it will also be enough for him.”

“You’re very wise,” Erica murmured.

“Wisdom is born of suffering. It’s learned, not innate.” He smiled. “I imagine you’re pretty wise yourself.”

She blushed.

“How is Bianca?” he asked, opting for a change of subject. “I heard she went back to Paris.”

“She did,” Kendall whined. “I understand, but I miss the hell out of her. She’s doing well, and she made us promise not to harass you, so if you reach the point where you feel like we are, tell us and we’ll back off.”

He gave her a shy smile. “I haven’t gotten there yet.”

She smiled in response.

“How are you doing?” he asked baldly. “Ethan?”

She grimaced. “You’ve probably heard we broke up.” She shook her head. “It had absolutely nothing to do with you or your relationship with him. I didn’t come to his bed some blushing virgin, and I have no problem with the fact that he slept with another man. He didn't cheat on me.

“I broke up with him because he lied. He lied about the work Cambias was supposedly doing for the Miranda Center. He lied about his intentions toward Bianca and Miranda about the company.” She paused. “And he lied about Zach.

“Now, don’t get me wrong. I understand why he lied about his father. I’m not a hypocrite and I threw my own mother under the bus more times than I can count because I felt abandoned and betrayed.”

Erica patted her daughter’s hand. “That doesn’t matter anymore.”

Kendall placed her hand on top of her mother’s own. “Yes, it does. It will always matter, because I will always need to be reminded that my feelings don’t get to determine how others live their lives. I will always need to be reminded that my actions have consequences and that, if I don’t think before I act, I can hurt a lot of people. As much as I’ve changed, I will always need to be reminded of those things.”

She exhaled. “That said, Ethan needs to grow a pair and grow up. We’re not kids, and we’re playing for keeps. Accusing your father, no matter how much you hate him, of a murder he didn’t commit is beyond the pale. He apologized, but not for the right reasons. He still doesn’t understand what he did was wrong, or how much running Cambias has changed him. He just expected me to capitulate, and when I didn’t, he had the gall to propose.”

Kurt stared as Erica’s eyes bugged out.

“Yeah.”

Kurt shook his head. “I can understand Ethan feels betrayed, but unlike you, I don’t think he’s ever taken a moment to consider Zach’s point of view.”

Maria Gray, who had been hovering outside the room waiting for a chance to talk to Kurt about Edmund, continued to hold her silence after he began speaking of her ex-lover. She supposed she was curious what, if any, insight Kurt was about to offer.

“What do you mean?” Erica asked.

“Well, you went through something similar when Kendall came to town, right?”

“I guess,” she said slowly, never having considered it.

“Like Ethan, Kendall wanted acknowledgment. She wanted a name and an identity she felt had been denied her.”

“That’s true,” admitted a grudging Kendall.

“But once you understood why Erica had given you up, that it really had less to do with you than with what was done to her, you considered your anger in a new light, didn’t you? It wasn’t so easy to hate her anymore.”

“Yes,” she softly admitted, closing her eyes. She rued the day she had brought her biological father to town to disprove Erica’s claims. She was horrified by her myopia of her pain that almost resulted in that miserable cretin nearly attacking her sister.

“I’ve heard a lot of talk about Zach,” Kurt continued, “but one thing I’ve never heard questioned is _why_ he faked his own death. I raised the point with Mr. Lavery when he visited me; by the way, that man is an asshole. I told him if he ever darkened my doorstep again, he wouldn’t like the results.”

Erica was somewhat affronted. She knew and liked Ryan, and thought him the best man for Kendall, but she also knew he could be overprotective and ham-fisted when it came to people threatening what he believed to be his.

Kendall’s eyes darkened. She loved Ryan and always would, but she also knew him. They were damaged in similar ways, and she found it all too plausible he had shown up at Kurt’s door with threats and intimidation. She would be sure to interrogate him later.

“At any rate,” Kurt continued, “what I fail to understand is why no one has stopped to think of what must have happened to Zach in his father’s house for him to take such drastic, permanent action. After all, we know how Michael turned out.”

Kendall and Erica blinked, turned to look at each other, and then turned back to stare at him, truly never having thought about it before. They knew Michael’s relationship with his father had been contentious, bordering on psychotic. Michael had been desperate for his father’s approval and, when he never received it, believed he was entitled to take whatever he wanted. He took over Fusion. He took over Enchantment. He tried to rape Kendall, and then Erica, and succeeded in raping Bianca.

Had their anger at Michael been so misplaced that they had shifted to Zach? How could Zach, only a teenager when he escaped his father’s hold, been responsible for Michael? Wasn’t it much more likely that it was their _father_ who had so badly parented Michael that he was responsible for the man his son had become?

“Zach has said he’s afraid of who Ethan would turn into if he acknowledged him,” Kendall muttered. “The Cambias Curse.”

Kurt raised a brow. “And was he wrong to be worried? You admitted that Ethan has changed since he assumed control of Cambias Industries. I knew Ethan once, but I don’t know him now. You said that he’s lied, made false accusations that could have seen Zach imprisoned or with a needle in his arm, and gone back on promises to make right what Michael had made so wrong.”

“That’s true,” Erica said quietly.

“And remember, before Zach arrived in Pine Valley, he had no clue Ethan existed … but his father did. Imagine never knowing you had a child and then discovering your own child hated you for your ignorance. Imagine knowing your father knew of the child and banished him and his mother from your life without even consulting you. Imagine knowing that child revered your father, knowing what that same man had done to you and your brother.

“I’m not saying Zach made the right choices,” Kurt continued, “but why has no one bothered to consider why he made the choices he did? Why was Ethan so deserving of the Cambias name when he never bothered to discover what it entailed?”

* * *

Zach stood silently at the second entryway into the sunroom, blinking back tears he would never allow to fall. He hadn’t allowed it before, and he wouldn’t now, but now felt understood in a way he had never experienced or expected.

He had been waiting for Kurt to give him a signal, for the other man suspected Maria at least would try to corner him. Kendall and Erica had been a surprise, but Kurt had dealt with them masterfully, and perhaps made some inroads he had been desperate to establish.

But Zach had never expected this. He hadn’t spoken with Kurt about Ethan. He knew Kurt and Ethan had been involved, but not the extent to which they had discussed him. Despite not having all the pieces, Kurt had run with those he did have, and made speculations that were not only accurate, but healing.

Zach had never minded being perceived as the bad guy. He had even learned to play it up over the years. Yet here was this man he barely knew, but to whom he was engaged, defending him and encouraging his detractors to consider his actions in new ways. He now realized Kurt had meant what he said. Regardless of how this marriage would come about, despite that it would only be on paper, Kurt wanted a partner. A friend. A protector.

Zach had never expected Kurt just might be all those things for him, as well.

* * *

“I knew Ethan was looking for his father, though he never disclosed the Cambias name. I knew he was tortured and disappointed and terribly sad. I knew he felt slighted and bastardized and ashamed. He sees Zach as denying him an identity, but what does that identity truly mean?”

“Damn,” Kendall whispered.

Maria shook her head to clear it, having not expected and being unable to contemplate Kurt’s postulations. She was barely able to admit Zach hadn’t killed her husband, despite his proven innocence, and she knew she would soon have to deal with that guilt and shame but wasn’t yet ready. Instead, she needed to try and talk to Kurt about Edmund. She felt it was the least she could do for her husband and Dimitri. After all, Kurt was a cousin to her children, as well.

“Excuse me,” she said gently, not wanting to irritate Kurt while thoroughly hoping to irritate Erica. “Kurt, I was hoping you might have a minute to talk before you leave.”

“Oh, get lost, Maria,” Erica said dismissively, rolling her eyes.

Maria ignored her. “The kids were hoping you might consider a meeting with them. With Edmund gone, they believed they had no family other than mine. Whether or not Dimitri ever knew of you, you are his son, and he was their uncle. They’d like the chance to get to know you.”

Kendall placed a restraining arm on her mother. She had no feelings about Maria one way or the other, and certainly didn’t share her mother’s antipathy for the woman. Maria had lost her husband and her children were probably flailing. As much as she wanted to get to know Kurt, she couldn’t deny the rest of his family probably wanted the same opportunity.

Kurt picked his box up off the floor and stood, holding it protectively in front of him like a shield. “I would like to meet them, as well, Maria. I don’t know how it will go, as I never knew Dimitri and barely knew Edmund, but your children are my cousins. You can get my number from the staff directory. Call me later.”

Maria gave him a grateful smile and nodded, continuing to ignore the dark look Erica was sending her. She knew she had interrupted their meet and greet, but she refused to grant Erica special privileges just because she was _Erica Kane_.

Erica stood and smoothed her skirt. “You know, Maria …”

Before she could complete that statement, Ethan burst into the room.

“Kendall, please!” he begged. “Please talk to me! This doesn’t have to be over!”

Maria stared, Erica rolled her eyes, and Kurt raised a brow. He hadn’t expected this, but how fortuitous! He could lineup his arrows and fire them with a single shot. He hoped Erica and Kendall would still be willing to speak with him after this, but if not, well, they would always have today.

Kendall stood and threw Ethan’s arm off her. “We were over the minute you lied about Zach,” she spat. “Don’t fool yourself that you did it for any reason other than pure and simple revenge.”

Erica was thrilled! She had wanted her daughter away from Ethan the moment they announced they were together. She just hoped Kendall remained firm in her stance.

“Why are you letting my father come between us?” Ethan demanded.

“The only person responsible for this is you,” Kendall seethed. “Ryan betrayed me by handing Cambias over to Greenlee. When you took control of the company, you promised to sign half of it over to Bianca for Miranda. You promised you were committed to helping realize Bianca’s vision of the Miranda Center, but you backed out of that too, and then lied about it. You swore to me you weren’t lying about Zach killing Edmund, but you were. All you do is lie!”

Greenlee skidded into the room, panting. “Thank god! Kendall, he has a ring! Don’t fall for it!”

Kendall scoffed. “I already threw it back in his face.”

“What a week!”

They all turned toward Kurt, who had a disturbing smile on his face.

“Kurt,” Ethan gasped, reaching for him but quickly pulling away. “I … I didn’t know you were here. I was hoping to speak with you.”

“I can’t imagine why,” Kurt said. “I meant what I said on the stand, Ethan. I will always love you. I know you can be a good man. I wouldn’t have given myself to you were that not the case, but I don’t know where that man has gone. I love you, but right now, I really don’t like you.”

A curious Kendall watched closely Ethan’s reaction, noting his devastation. They hadn’t spoken in detail of Kurt, but Kendall had nonetheless gotten the sense that he was very dear to Ethan. It was over for them, but Kurt would always hold a place in Ethan’s heart, much like Ryan did in hers.

Greenlee blinked. So, this must be her new cousin. Well, cousin by marriage, once her father married Erica. He certainly was pretty. She knew Jackson had spoken with Kurt but had refused to acknowledge the details of their discussion.

“We haven’t been introduced,” she said. “I’m Greenlee Smythe.”

“I know who you are.”

It was such a loaded statement, and Erica and Kendall were absolutely tickled. Erica loved Jack but hated his daughter. Greenlee and Kendall were best friends or worst enemies, depending on the day, and it appeared as though they were currently on the outs. It probably wouldn’t last long; it never did. At least Greenlee had come to talk sense into Kendall, not knowing it was unneeded.

Kurt smirked. “So many men, so little time. First the son, my ex, proposes to my cousin, only to have the ring thrown back in his face …”

Kendall smirked in kind.

“… and then Daddy comes a’callin’ just eager to walk me down the aisle.”

Complete and utter silence descended, everyone staring at him in either confusion or horror.

“Lucky I know the way to the psych ward,” Greenlee drawled.

“From personal experience, we know,” Kendall said, wondering what game Kurt was playing and trying to figure out what side she was on.

“Either of you getting hitched to either Cambias has crazy written all over it,” Greenlee said.

“You would know,” Erica hissed.

“Not at all,” Kurt smoothly said to Greenlee. “Zach was very clear, very calm, and stated upfront what he wanted from our marriage.”

“Kurt,” Ethan tried, “I know you’re very upset about what happened in court, and I’m sure you feel your memories of our time together have been betrayed by my recent actions, but please - _please_ – don’t demean yourself by pretending you and … that you and Zach would ever …”

Kurt grinned. “You think I’m lying? I thought you knew me better than that."

“Kurt doesn’t lie,” Erica said, with dawning horror.

“He doesn’t. Ah, there’s my gorgeous fiancé!”

Kurt repressed his smile as everyone turned to find Zach Slater in the room. He wasn’t looking at them, of course; he had eyes only for Kurt.

“What?” a helpless Maria repeated.

“Fiancé?!” Ethan shouted.

Zach crossed the room and stood at Kurt’s side, staring into his eyes, which he found rather easy to do. “I asked Kurt to marry me and, if he accepts, he’ll make me one hell of a lucky fellow.”

He easily took the box from Kurt’s hands and held it up with an arm. In the other he held a pink rose.

“I don’t need you to be my bellhop,” Kurt said, smiling.

“You have surgeon’s hands, healing hands. They shouldn’t be bothered with manual labor.” He took Kurt’s hand and pressed a gentle kiss to his palm, before placing the flower in his grasp.

Kurt looked at it and then stared up at Zach. “No one’s ever given me flowers before,” he whispered.

“I plan to remedy that. Often.”

Kurt ducked his head.

“Oh, my god,” Erica breathed.

Maria, Ethan, and Greenlee stared, absolutely appalled. Kendall, however, suspected what was going on, and silently appointed herself their cheerleader. They were going to need someone in their corner, and it might as well be her.

“Pink roses are my favorite,” Kurt said.

“Yeah, since when?” Greenlee demanded.

“Since now. Everything Zach says and does makes me see my life in a whole new way, just bursting with possibilities.”

“Watch me burst up my breakfast now,” Greenlee muttered.

“Why are you even here?” Zach asked her. “You don’t know either one of us.”

“Kurt is my cousin.”

Kurt raised a brow but said nothing. “Zach,” he said sweetly, “you would never pressure me into taking such a huge step, would you?”

“Never. I think we make perfect sense, but you take all the time you need. You’re worth waiting for.”

“I must have fallen down a rabbit hole,” Erica said.

“How is it that this makes sense?” Ethan demanded. “You’re not gay, Zach.”

“Neither are you,” his father replied, “but you were involved with Kurt. Since you’re so interested in labels, would you care to define yours now?”

“I’m bisexual,” Ethan hissed through clenched teeth.

“Well, congratulations. I’m sorry I never had the opportunity to throw you a coming out party, but I wish you the best of luck. I do hope you won’t lie to your next paramour.”

Ethan’s complexion turned florid. Kendall appreciated the jab and sent a nod in Zach’s direction. Greenlee tilted her head in thought.

“You’ve often claimed I don’t know you, Ethan,” Zach said, “so don’t presume to know me. I look at this amazing young man and see those beautiful eyes looking back at me. I see that perfect skin; the keen, analytical mind; the caring heart which deserves to be held closely and with gentle tenderness.” He grinned and loomed over Kurt. “And an ass so tight you could bounce a dime off it.”

Kurt blushed and punched Zach’s shoulder.

Kendall stared at them in fascination. She wasn’t sure what they were really doing, whether it was for business or just to get a rise out of Ethan and Maria, but there was some obvious genuine affection between them. They didn’t realize it, of course, because they were men.

“I can well believe my own father would do this to me,” Ethan ground out, “but I expected better of you, Kurt. At least I didn't know you and Kendall were cousins before I became involved with her. But you? First the son, and now the father? I never knew you were such a whore.”

Everyone could see just how badly those hateful words affected Kurt, knowing Ethan had been the only man he had been with since his rape. Kurt paled and shrunk in on himself, an errant thorn on the rose in his hand cutting into his flesh as he curled his hand into a fist.

“You unbelievable bastard!” Zach roared.

“How dare you!” Erica screeched at Ethan, raising her hand to slap him.

Kendall beat her to the punch – literally – by driving her fist into Ethan’s gut. He was more surprised than hurt but still had to double over to catch his breath.

“You never deserved him,” she screamed. “Or me!”

She was surprised when Kurt placed a gentle arm around her waist and pulled him flush against him, obviously worried Ethan might retaliate. He wouldn’t under normal circumstances, but this was anything but normal, and it was apparent Ethan was close to losing his shit completely. She felt Kurt’s arm trembling around her, and her furor was instantly reignited. She could only imagine the memory an angry man stoked within him.

“I’m getting you out of here,” she said quietly, and began pushing him from the room. She caught her mother’s eye and Erica nodded in return. Greenlee chased after them.

Erica didn’t like what was happening here, but she would address it later. Kurt looked hurt and scared, and she wasn’t going to abide it.

Zach glared at his son. “You ever come near him again, you ever say another cross or hurtful word to him again, and I will end you!”

Erica, for one, believed him.

“Zach, you can’t blame Ethan!” Maria insisted.

“The hell I can’t!” he screamed, causing her to jump back in alarm. “Kurt has does nothing but love him, even if only as a friend, which is more than he deserves!”

“And how would you feel if Ethan stole your partner?” she demanded.

“I would ask my partner who they wished to be with, and then abide their wishes.” Zach raised a brow. “As you well know.”

She blushed and looked away.

Erica glared up at Zach and he somewhat shrank back. She was tiny, but she was mighty. He knew it and respected her for it.

“You and I will be having a long talk,” she said to him. She turned, dismissed Maria with a glance, and turned her glare onto Ethan. “You ever come near my family again, and you better pray your father gets to you before I do.”

She stalked from the room.

“Please tell Kurt I’m sorry,” whispered a miserable Ethan, fat tears slipping down his cheeks. “I didn’t mean it, truly. I love him; I’ll always love him. I was just surprised and hurt. I reacted before I could think.”

Zach gave him a disgusted look. “That’s all you’ve done since you arrived in Pine Valley. Heed Erica’s warning, for I don’t think she’ll give you another.”

He ignored Maria and left the room in search of his fiancé.


	5. Kissing Cousins

Zach caught up with Kurt outside the hospital, waiting for the valet to deliver his car. He absently wondered what Kurt drove. He noticed Kendall arguing with Greenlee, obviously trying to shake the woman loose, but Greenlee wasn’t budging. He had no idea why, and it was apparent Kendall was similarly exasperated.

Kurt and Greenlee were unrelated and, even once Jack and Erica were married, would only be cousins by a technicality. Zach suspected Greenlee was looking for an ally; for what, he wasn’t sure. A possible Trojan horse against Kendall, Erica, or perhaps both. It was his opinion that Greenlee was a clever girl, but had difficulty establishing and meeting long-term goals, as well as respecting boundaries.

Kurt had moved to Pine Valley to be close to the Kane women, and had admitted he had never planned on telling them who he truly was, content enough just to be near them. Greenlee should have been able to read through the lines, the ones that clearly indicated Kurt placed a high priority on family and had an obvious love and respect for Erica and her daughters.

As Kendall and Greenlee continued to argue, a serene Kurt stood waiting for his car to arrive.

“Are you okay?” Zach asked.

“I am. Don’t be upset with Ethan, Zach. It’s not worth it, and he was overwrought. We both knew he would react poorly to the announcement. Did you honestly think he would congratulate us?”

“He was still out of line,” Zach said gruffly.

Kurt turned and stared up into Zach’s eyes. “And he knows that. Nothing we do or say will punish him more than his own conscience. Let that be enough. It is for me.”

Zach considered this and at last nodded. “You handled them well.”

Kurt shrugged a shoulder. “I handled them by not handling them at all. You own two casinos, Zach. I’m sure you’ve spent a significant time studying people, right? Consider Erica. She might come across as reactionary and histrionic, but that’s a feint. Perhaps she truly was those things when she was younger, I don’t know, but no longer.

“Erica acts that way because she knows it’s what people expect of her. She gives them exactly what they want, and they either dismiss her or believe once she’s vented her spleen, she’s done. That’s how she treats Maria. Maria is a highly intelligent woman and an exceptional neurosurgeon, but she’s also naïve and self-righteous.”

He raised a brow. “Do you wish me to continue? I know how you once felt about Maria.”

“I’m actually finding this fascinating,” Zach said. “Continue, Professor.”

“Hm. I like that. Professor Kurt. How do you think I would look with glasses?”

“Sexy as hell,” Zach leered, “but I imagine you’d look sexy in anything.”

Kurt rolled his eyes in fondness. He liked compliments and he liked flirting. He was glad Zach understood this and was willing to play along.

“Maria expects catty remarks, so Erica delivers. Maria in turn discounts the threat Erica poses, while feeling morally superior to her. The danger of perceived superiority is its inherent inflexibility. Maria believes she is always right and Erica wrong, so no matter what Erica says or does, Maria rejects it utterly.”

Zach blinked.

Kurt chuckled darkly and shook his head. “Erica has lulled Maria into a false sense of security. If or when Erica decides to strike, Maria will never see her coming – and she only has herself to blame.”

Zach stared, not noticing that Kendall and Greenlee had stopped arguing and joined him.

“That’s a pretty accurate assessment, particularly about Erica,” Greenlee noted.

“Erica’s been playing this game a long time,” Kurt said, “and she mastered it a while ago. People look at her and see a petite woman who weighs no more than a hundred pounds soaking wet; that’s she’s all bark and no bite. That’s their mistake, and she capitalizes on it. They look at her myriad marriages and believe her to be a romantic fool.”

He raised a brow. “Tell me, Kendall, as her daughter, can you think of one divorce in which Erica has come out for the worse? Even those husbands who despised being married to her still adore her. Hell, some of them married her twice!”

“That just means she puts on a good act,” Greenlee sniffed.

Kurt stared. “Really. Greenlee, your father is currently engaged to Erica. He’s been engaged to her several times previously.”

“Because she can’t make a relationship last.”

“So you believe your father to be simple and unsophisticated?”

Too late, she realized the trap.

“Of course not. So consider this: Erica was married to Jack’s brother _twice_ and had a child with him. They had contentious divorces and a bitter custody dispute. Jack was a first-hand witness to Erica’s behavior throughout all of that and _still_ wants to marry her. Why? Because he loves her. She’s a force of nature and he can’t wait to be swept up in her whirlwind.”

“All right,” Kendall began, “since you seem to know my mother so well, what’s her next move?”

“Separating me from Zach,” Kurt easily replied. “Despite her acumen, Erica looks at Zach and sees only a Cambias. That has nothing to do with him and everything to do with Michael. She equates the name _Cambias_ with the monster who attacked you and raped Bianca. His own attack on her doesn’t matter; Erica prizes her family above all.”

Kendall gave a thoughtful nod.

“She sees Zach as a threat to me, and no matter how new I am to your family, I’m still your family, so she’s going to take steps. She’s also smart enough to realize I know this. I expect her to come to me sooner rather than later to try and talk me out of it. She’ll make dire predictions, huff and puff, and try to find others to help change my mind.”

Kendall began to smirk.

“But that’s the feint.”

Her mouth fell open in surprise.

“She knows a large part of this marriage is about the casinos, about getting them up and running again. First, she’ll offer Zach money to negate the necessity of the marriage. He’ll turn her down and she knows this. Then she’ll offer to marry him in my place, stay married to him long enough for the casinos to turn a profit, and then divorce him and marry Jack.”

“I knew she would hurt my father!” Greenlee screeched.

Kurt shook his head. “She loves Jack. This would be a temporary measure to spare me from what she believes is some great folly. To Erica, it makes sense. Her name holds far more sway in this town, in this world, than mine. As a co-owner of the casinos, that name recognition alone would have them packed every night. It’s not about hurting Jack but saving me, even if that means sacrificing herself.”

Greenlee frowned in thought, his words sinking into her mind and making her consider Erica in ways she never had before.

“Family is everything,” Kurt repeated. “Erica was raised that way; so was I and so was Zach. He had such difficulty reconciling what Michael did not because he disbelieved Bianca – it’s obvious he respects and cares for her deeply – but because Michael was his brother.”

He looked at Greenlee and then Kendall. “When your parents marry, you’ll be sisters. I have a stepbrother, and blood doesn't count unless you insist upon it. You’re co-owners of an emerging cosmetics force. I see that you squabble, but it appears to be about mostly inconsequential things. You’re far closer than I think anyone suspects or will ever know. When the chips are down, you know you can count on each other, and perhaps _only_ each other. Right?”

They each gave reluctant nods.

“So tell me something, Greenlee. If Kendall really _had_ killed Michael for raping Bianca – all that drama with the phony pregnancy and Ryan Lavery aside – would you turn her in, or help her bury the body?”

Greenlee swallowed heavily, but at last nodded.

“Family first. Once Zach accepted what Michael had become, he himself became one of Bianca’s greatest champions. Why? Not just because he knew Michael was guilty, that he had committed unspeakable acts, but because Miranda is Zach’s niece. He wanted to make right what Michael made so very wrong. Michael ceased to become family because he had become an animal. All Zach knew was to protect Miranda, as you would protect Kendall and she would you.”

Kendall looked up and gave Zach a look of dawning realization. She saw the subtle play of emotions flitting across Zach’s face, a man who often came across as an automaton, and finally understood his position. Nothing ever could or would turn her from Bianca, so how could anyone expect Zach to turn on his brother simply on someone else’s say-so?

He had needed to think about it, wrestle with it, and make some very difficult and hard choices, but he had made them, and he had chosen Bianca.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I never thought about it in those terms. He was your brother and he had been killed. No matter what he had done or to whom, I should have tried better to understand your position. I would defend Bianca to my dying breath.”

Zach blinked harshly and looked away. “Bianca is worth defending.”

“And so was Michael, once upon a time,” Kurt said quietly. “You remembered him as he was, not what he became, and when you realized the truth, you transferred that loyalty to your niece and her mother because you knew it was right.”

Zach’s jaws flexed. “I took too long.”

Kurt shook his head. “Never apologize for how you feel. In the end, all that matters is what was true, and truly felt – and how we treated one another. Don’t be sorry for loving your brother, Zach, and don’t be sorry for what he became. Mourn him for who he used to be.”

Zach took a deep breath and then slowly released it. Greenlee saw only a man in conflict; Kendall saw a man who was starting to fall in love with her cousin.

“What about Jack?” Greenlee said softly.

“Erica isn’t going to hurt Jack,” Kurt said. “On some level she knows Zach would never accept her offer, but she has to make it so that she can believe she tried everything she could to separate us. In the end, she’ll fail, but she’ll still have tried.”

“Do you really think she’ll give up that easily?” Kendall asked, brow raised.

“Of course not,” Kurt replied, “but she doesn’t really know me, Kendall. If she thinks she’s stubborn, wait until she gets a load of me.”

Greenlee grinned, always happy for Erica to get a taste of her own medicine. “How about lunch?”

“Thank you, Greenlee, but Kendall and I have plans and Zach is my escort, because I’m a very shy boy who’s naïve to the ways of this big, bad world.”

Kendall burst out laughing.

“I would be interested in touring Fusion,” he continued. “Perhaps you could show me around some time?”

Greenlee gave an enthusiastic nod.

“Apparently his best friend is a huge aficionado of our products,” Kendall said, remembering Kurt’s testimony. “Who is she, anyway?”

Kurt’s smile was blinding, and it was apparent how much he adored his friend. “Her name is Brittany Pierce. She’s finishing up her psychology doctorate at Columbia University.”

Greenlee blinked. “I recognize that name. She orders directly from our website. She buys our products in bulk.” She saw dollar signs flash before her eyes. “How about the day after tomorrow? Kendall can give you the address.”

Kurt smiled and nodded.

Greenlee squealed and skipped away, not bothering to say goodbye to Kendall and ignoring Zach completely.

Kurt stared after her, a smirk slowly spreading across his face. “This is going to be fun.”

* * *

Kendall pushed past Kurt and stormed into his loft, taking a moment to look around.

Very nice, she thought. Tasteful and elegant, but still warm and comfortable. She didn’t understand the art, but imagined it was expensive and rare. Her cousin had good taste, and she suddenly resented her boring condo and the lack of decorating she had done.

She put her hands on her hips and turned toward the Dynamic Duo, both of whom were watching her with trepidation. She liked that. She smelled their fear, and she liked that, too.

“So what the hell is really going on here?” she barked, playing this role for all it was worth.

It was apparent to Kendall Hart, Resident Evil Genius, that these two dummies had no idea just how much they liked each other. She would have to play this carefully. She couldn’t be so over the top they might construe her a threat – no way in hell did she want Zach Slater after her, though she thought Kurt was more dangerous – but she also didn’t want to be out of the loop. Gossip was almost as good as sex, and she wasn’t getting much of either lately. So.

Part of her really wanted to point out the obvious and demand they kiss, both for their pleasure and hers, but she would have much more fun watching them slowly realize they were falling in love. Then she could declare she knew it all along, was the only who did, and tout her victory to all and sundry. Because she loved gloating.

So, the long game, then.

She then inwardly glowered. Stupid sappy, romantic drivel. She blamed Bianca, who obviously had infected her with hope, or some other trite Lifetime emotion. _Awful_.

“Most of what we told you is true,” Kurt said, shrugging, before turning to close and lock the door, and then set the alarm. Security was paramount and always would be. “There are some additional caveats I asked to be put in the prenuptial agreement, but nothing particularly tasty. Sorry.”

She pouted. “Well, what caveats, then?” She noticed his eyes slid toward Zach and suspected they weren’t going to tell her everything. As curious as she was, she understood the need for secrets.

“The first is an escape clause,” Zach said, taking a seat. “If I make Kurt unhappy for any reason, I will give him an uncontested divorce, though he agreed to stay married to me long enough for the liquor and gaming licenses to be transferred.”

She nodded. That was to be expected. She also appreciated Kurt wouldn’t be trapped if he didn’t want to be. Soon enough, she thought, he’d find he liked being trapped by a pair of big, burly arms.

“The next,” Kurt continued, “is that a majority of my share of the profits, for which I have no real use, is donated directly to the Miranda Center.”

Her eyes became huge. She could only imagine the sum of money that would entail, but it would be enough to fund all current programs, as well as develop many more, for the foreseeable future.

“It’s to be anonymous,” Kurt said, somewhat sharply, “so you can’t let on that you know. I don’t want it traced back to me or Zach, so it will be funneled through a holding company, possibly offshore.”

“Why don’t you want Bianca to know?” she asked, confused.

“I’m not so much worried about her, but about the rest of the board. I don’t want them thinking this gravy train will never end, because it eventually will.”

She understood the implication. He wasn’t planning on staying married to Zach forever – or, at least, that’s what he wanted her to think.

“They need to continue to pursue alternate sources of funding, including government grants and community organizing. There are enough deep pockets in this town that neither Zach nor I should be expected to foot the bill in perpetuity.”

She nodded. That was fair. Left unspoken was the suggestion that, were the center to devolve into dire financial straits, Kurt probably would ride to the rescue, but it shouldn’t be considered a given.

“I really do believe in what Bianca started, Kendall,” he said quietly. “I want the Miranda Center to succeed.”

“Thank you,” she whispered.

He nodded and looked away.

“The next part is up to me,” Zach said. “I have agreed to challenge my father’s will and pursue control of Cambias Industries.”

She blew out a breath. “Yikes. Do you even want to do that?”

“Not particularly, but I will. I hated my father and everything he represented, but Cambias can do a lot of good if it's properly directed. I’ve seen the financials. Michael was adequate, but not stellar, which I’m sure our father drove home to him at every opportunity. No matter how good Ethan is, no matter his education, he is simply too young to run a multi-billion dollar corporation on his own.”

“And Ryan?” she asked.

“Has no business there,” Kurt cut in. “Alexander might have named him his heir, and I’m sure Ryan is intelligent, but he has no business background. Ethan at least has an MBA. Further, he backs out of his promises, much like Ethan.”

Her face darkened. She knew all too well.

“Kurt asked me to sign a quarter of the company over to Bianca for Miranda,” Zach said, “but I’ll settle for no less than half. It’s the least she deserves and I never want her to worry about her or her daughter’s futures.”

He held up a hand to stall the interruption he knew would be coming. “I know you and Erica would step in if necessary, but I want to ensure that it won’t be.” He growled. “Michael may be dead, but he still owes Bianca for pain and suffering, and one way or the other, he’s going to pay.”

Kendall pressed her lips tightly together, too moved to speak. She nodded her thanks.

“No matter what I think of my father or brother, that company is Miranda’s legacy. It should be hers, and it will be. Bianca will hold that portion in trust until Miranda reaches whatever age Bianca designates for her to inherit. Once that happens, I will sign my shares over to Bianca. The best possible future for Cambias Industries is to make sure a Cambias will no longer run it. If Ryan and Ethan won’t do what’s right, I will.”

Kendall wondered what that meant for Ethan, but was smart enough not to question it.

Kurt placed his hand on Zach’s shoulder. “You’re a good man.”

“Nah,” Zach disagreed, “I just believe people should get what they deserve, both good and bad. Bianca is still paying for something that wasn’t her fault, and she always will be.”

He met Kurt’s eyes and they stared at each other for a long moment. It went unspoken Zach understood Kurt may have been victimized and he would perhaps have to carry that with him forever, but he was no one’s victim. He intended to make sure Bianca never would be again, either.

Kendall wanted to coo. _Damn them_.

“This next part,” Kurt began, reluctantly turning from Zach to his cousin, “is something you cannot tell anyone else about. Do I have your word?”

She hesitated. She used to extend her word like it was nothing, but it would be something to Kurt. It might just be everything. So the question was, could she do it? Could she promise to hold a secret and then do so? Yeah, she thought; for the right person, she probably could. She rather thought Kurt was the right person.

“I give you my word.”

Kurt nodded. “Once Zach assumes control of Cambias, he will divest it of Enchantment Cosmetics and relinquish control to Erica.”

She blinked. “Holy shit. You don’t know what that would mean to her.”

“Of course he does,” Zach said. “He wouldn’t have made that a condition if he didn’t.”

It was adorable how they defended one another. She was truly beginning to think Erica, and probably everyone else, would have a very difficult time separating them - and she couldn't wait to watch as they tried. She wanted to ask about Fusion, but knew better. Ryan had given the Cambias shares to Greenlee, and Zach’s assumption of the company couldn’t change that.

She didn’t like it, but she understood it. Greenlee would be the majority shareholder for the foreseeable future, but that didn’t necessarily mean forever. Besides, neither Kurt nor Zach owed her anything. She was still a partner in Fusion and the company was in the black. It would be fine, and so would she.

“Erica’s worked her entire life for that company,” Kurt said coldly. “It should be hers, and it will be again.”

“What about Chandler Enterprises?” she asked.

Kurt and Zach smirked as one.

“That depends on how Adam Chandler and his family presents themselves to me,” Kurt said. “Zach and I have spoken about it, and he finds Adam annoying. I trust my intended. Besides, JR worked with Ethan to set up Zach. That’s not something I’ll easily forgive.”

She nodded slowly, noticing the tiny smile on Zach’s face that was quickly and ruthlessly suppressed before it could erupt.

“So, it’s all business,” she summarized.

“No,” Kurt said easily. “My primary reason for marrying Zach is very personal. He’ll keep any prospective suitors far, far away from me.”

She raised her brows. “No romance for you then?”

“I’ll pass,” he said drily, rolling his eyes. “It’s a complication I neither want nor need, and I know it will be coming soon.” He withdrew his phone and handed it to her. “Tilt the screen.”

She frowned and did what he said. She then gaped. “Over sixty text messages? Over a hundred Facebook comments? Over three hundred tweets and DMs?”

He sighed. “People who know me, even if only barely, who now know I am the nephew of Erica Kane. A lot of those are requests for autographs. Some are messages from alleged entrepreneurs and scam artists who can’t reach her directly because she’s blocked them. There are many requests for swag and discount codes for Enchantment and Fusion products. There are offers to sell my story to tabloids and so-called reputable journalists.”

She groaned and dropped the phone on the sofa. “I’m so sorry. Believe me, I do understand. So many people have tried to use me to get to my mother and sister. The story about you broke only a month ago, but I’m sure this will all die down soon enough.”

He raised a brow. “Kendall, these are just from today.”

She paled.

“The worst are from women _and men_ who want me to be their doctor simply because I’m one step removed from Erica.”

“But you’re a gynecologist!” she protested.

“They don’t care. Then there are the comments about you and Bianca; how horrible you are and should never have reappeared in your mother’s life; how Bianca lied about the rape and is a murderer who should be in jail. I won’t even address the comments about Miranda. They can’t get at the Kane women, so they come to me.”

“I’m sorry,” she said quietly, dropping her head. She was furious, however, that anyone had anything negative to say against her niece. Miranda was an innocent child!

“Why are you sorry?” he demanded. “None of this is your fault. I don’t blame you. I’m sure eventually I will delete my social media completely, and I’m fine with that. I grew up with it, so I’m used to it, but I don’t require it to live my life. It will only get worse when I marry Zach. I didn’t mention the homophobia, but it’s always there. The slut-shaming will start when I marry the father of my last boyfriend.”

Zach’s hands curled into fists. He honestly hadn’t considered that. He didn’t use social media, though he was aware of it, but the thought of Kurt being attacked in any way infuriated him.

Kurt thoughtlessly reached up and carded his fingers through Zach’s hair. “Calm down. It’s all right. We don’t care what people think, remember?”

Indeed, Zach calmed and nodded, blowing out a cleansing breath and not consciously realizing how Kurt’s gentle touch instantly soothed him.

But Kendall noticed. “So,” she drawled, wanting to steer attention away from that little intimacy before either man understood what had just happened, “this marriage is also about keeping other people away from you.”

Kurt nodded. “For both of us. Zach is intimidating, if not outright scary. Anyone who comes after me, I’m going to point right at him and let him deal with it.”

“More than happy to,” Zach purred, baring his teeth.

“And I'm a lot more ... pernicious ... than people think from looking at me. I've been my own white knight my entire life, and I can easily be that for Zach. Any woman who comes sniffing around him will be quickly spayed without anesthesia."

Zach rumbled a dark laugh and flashed him a heart-stopping grin.

Kendall gasped with delight and applauded. "Please, _please_ make sure I'm there when that happens."

Kurt snickered. "Not to mention Zach is rich in his own right. Many will question why we married, but neither one of us will be called a gold-digger. Like I said, Zach can be terrifying; that will be enough to keep the gold-diggers away from me. He’s also gorgeous with a hot body, so no one who looks at him will wonder why I snatched him up before anyone else could.”

Zach smirked. “Hot body, huh?”

Kurt offered a bland look and a shrug in reply. “It’s true and you know it. Your clothes wouldn’t be tailored so well if you didn’t want to flaunt it.”

“Are you calling me vain?”

“It’s not vanity if it’s accurate.”

“You’re not so bad yourself.”

“I know. When news of our marriage breaks, all anyone will talk about is how lucky you are to have me.”

“They wouldn’t be wrong.”

Neither noticed how they were inching closer together or the smiles that were now on their faces. Kendall thought it was absolutely adorable, even if it made her want to vomit. These two yokels were going to end up thoroughly besotted with each other, and she wanted a front-row seat.

“So,” she began, looking at Kurt, “do you call him Daddy?”

Kurt blinked. “I will be from now on.”


	6. Confrontations

Kendall paced around her living room, unable to think about anything but how cute Zach and Kurt were, as well as how utterly oblivious they were to each other.

At first she considered it might just all be an act, as though she were their test subject; that if they could convince her, they would then be able to convince Erica and everyone else.

That idea, however, didn’t ring true. Granted, she didn’t know either of them very well, but one trait the boys shared above all others was a very private, reserved nature. She didn’t think they’d let their moments of unabashed adorableness erupt before her eyes unless they were totally incapable of controlling them.

Then she wondered if maybe their chemistry was so strong they actually _couldn’t_ control it, so they were playing coy, testing the waters to determine just how deeply they ran. Yet, she didn’t believe either of them were into playing games. Both were known for saying what they thought and meaning what they said.

She bit her lip and frowned in thought. No, she rather thought both Zach and Kurt truly _believed_ this would be a loveless marriage of convenience, one which they would hopefully weather as friends. They didn’t want romantic entanglements and thought marrying each other would remove them from the game entirely.

She laughed at how clueless they were. It was apparent to her, and her opinion was really the only one that mattered, they were totally dippy for each other. Of course they would fight it, because they were men, so they would need a guiding hand – either to hold them together or smack them when they became stupid. She therefore decided she would assume control of their lives and shape them into something she could stand, and all would be well. It really was the obvious and only solution.

A knock shook her from her thoughts. She crossed the room and opened the door to find Ryan. She narrowed her eyes. If she was going to force Kurt and Zach into submission, she first had to clean her own house.

“What the hell were you thinking?” she demanded. “Stay away from Kurt!”

Ryan pursed his lips. “I see he ran right to you.”

“Kurt has no need to run to anyone about anything. He is more than capable of taking care of himself, which should have been obvious after his testimony.”

“I was trying to protect you, Kendall.”

She rolled her eyes. She was so sick of men who thought she was some princess in an ivory tower who needed a man to save her. She had been saving herself her entire life. Ryan was only interested in the job when she didn’t need him; when she did, he ran.

“And what, exactly, do you think I need protection from? That Kurt might decide to shower me with some of his many billions? Oh, god, save me from all that money! That he might provide me, Erica, and Bianca with free, quality healthcare? That his experience with rape provides Bianca and Erica someone who not only understands their pain, but is also family?”

Ryan shook his head. “I knew this would happen. He’s already gotten to you. You listened to his sob story and adopted him as family immediately, just like he knew you would.”

Kendall stared at him. “Wow,” she finally breathed. “Despite our friendship, our numerous engagements, and our painful breakups, I never knew until this moment just how stupid you really are. You’re like decaf coffee – no active ingredient in the bean.”

He glowered at her.

“Wake up, Ryan,” she snapped. “First, Kurt _is_ our family; that was proven by _two_ DNA tests. Second, Kurt has nothing to gain from this. What do you think he’s after? Money? He’s got more than everyone in this town combined. Fame? He’s a superstar physician with better credentials than those who have been in the field for thirty years. The infamy he now has because of that stupid trial has seen him take a sabbatical from his job, turned almost everyone he knows into fanatical Erica stans, and caused him to sequester himself in his own home just so he can get some peace and quiet.

“What has being my cousin gotten him? He learned his mother was the product of rape. Do you think that’s fun? Because I can tell you from personal experience it’s anything but. He learned the man he loved and revered was not his father, but a dead man he’ll never know was. The uncle he barely knew was murdered, and Kurt was accused of being an accomplice.

“His entire life, aspects so personal and haunting he wasn’t yet ready to deal with them, was put on display by a vicious, prurient lawyer and then reported by every tabloid on the Eastern Seaboard. Secrets he never told anyone – _that were no one’s business_ – are being gossiped about like this is a soap opera and not his life. Gee, I can’t relate to that. It’s not like it ever happened to me. Or to Erica. Or to Bianca.”

Ryan winced. Shit, he really had jumped the gun on this. He was so desperate to protect Kendall and her family because he had failed so utterly in protecting them from Michael Cambias. Then Ethan had infiltrated their lives and, despite being initially wary, Ryan had formed somewhat of a friendship with him. And then Zach … well, he hated Zach. He didn’t even know why, really. Perhaps because Zach reminded him of his own father.

Regardless, Kurt was blameless in all of this. All Ryan had seen, however, was another man with the potential to hurt the women he cared about.

Kendall gave him a knowing look. “You never once thought about how his life has been torpedoed, did you? Tunnel vision, Ryan. You like to think you’re one of the good guys, but you can be just as single-minded and ruthless as David or Adam.”

“I just don’t want you to be hurt,” he said quietly.

“And how does hurting Kurt stop that?”

He looked down in shame.

“Go home, Ryan, and leave Kurt alone. I won’t tell you a second time.”

* * *

Across town, Kurt was dealing with his own surprise guest.

“David?” he asked. “What are you doing here?”

“I just wanted to make sure you’re okay,” David replied. “I tried calling, but you’re not answering your phone. Understandably.”

Kurt tilted his head and closely regarded the other man. “Why do you care?”

David offered a small smile. “Not because of Erica or her daughters. I love them and always will, despite the many, _many_ sins I’ve committed against them. You’re a good doctor, Kurt, and an even better man. I look at you and see what I could have been. It’s very humbling.”

“Doing bad things doesn’t make you a bad person, David. It makes you human.”

David laughed. “I don’t think anyone else would describe me that way. You know what I did to Bianca?”

Kurt raised a brow. “You mean how you let her believe her daughter was dead so that your daughter could pass off Miranda as her own baby? Yes, I know.” He paused. “I also know that when you say you love Bianca, you mean it. Your actions wouldn’t torture you this much if you didn’t.”

“I never thought I had that in me,” David admitted. “I know I’m not a good guy, but that was far lower than even I believed I could sink. I do love Bianca, and I hurt her in the most disgusting way imaginable.”

“You did,” Kurt agreed. “That you were trying to help your child doesn’t mitigate that. You made your choices, David, and now you have to live with them, but I meant what I said in court: you’re an incomparable physician. If I needed medical treatment, I would choose you. You truly strive to do the best by your patients.”

“That’s not enough anymore. I couldn’t love Bianca more than if she were my own daughter. I was one of the first people she told about the rape. I examined her afterwards. I’m the one who told her she was pregnant. I stood at her side throughout the pregnancy, and I still turned on her. What does that say about me?”

Kurt sighed. “That you’re so desperate to be a father, and a good one, that you hurt people you love to make her happy. Why are you here, David? I can’t offer you absolution. Only Bianca can do that.”

“And she would have once,” David whispered, “until I destroyed that part of her.”

“I think you’re giving yourself far too much credit,” Kurt sharply replied. “Bianca is her own person. If she didn’t let her rapist destroy her, I highly doubt she’d let you. Is she wiser, tougher? I’m sure. Is that due to you? Perhaps, in part. I don’t know if Bianca will ever forgive you, David, but, in the end, it’s how you act going forward that will tell her whether or not she should.”

“You’re so much like her, you know,” David said quietly. “Kendall, too. And Erica. I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.”

Kurt shrugged. “Because I didn’t want you to. I wasn’t ready.”

David raised his eyes. “You weren’t ready that day in court.”

Kurt swallowed. “No, I wasn’t, but my hand was forced and I had to play the cards I was dealt. I can’t change that. All I can do is choose how I’ll react.”

“Have you met them yet, spoken with them?”

“Kendall and Erica, yes. It was … nice. Healing, in a way. I haven’t spoken with Bianca, but she wrote me a letter I always carry with me because of how loved it makes me feel.”

David nodded. “That’s good. How is everything else?”

“Fine, I guess. It’s still early days. I’m sure you know I’ve taken a sabbatical.”

David grit his teeth. “I hate you were forced out of the hospital. You’re a damn good doctor, Kurt. If anyone belongs there, it’s you.”

Kurt sighed. “I’m not so sure of that now. Lately I’ve been wondering if I directed my path, or boxed myself into it. I became a doctor to honor my mother, but was that the right decision for me? For so long, I couldn’t think of anything else. Now … what does it say that I could let it go so easily?”

David was stunned. “You’re not going back after the media circus has died down?”

“Dr. Martin made it clear I will always be welcome at Pine Valley Hospital, but the truth is that I never felt welcomed. Or maybe, I never allowed myself. Besides you, there is no colleague I can say I’ve ever held a conversation with, outside of medicine. I don’t even know the first names of most of the staff. I held myself apart and they treated me accordingly. That’s on me. I was ambivalent and they sensed that, despite the respect they hold for my ability. But that respect is for my ability, not me.”

That hit closer to home than David would have liked. “So what are you going to do now?”

Kurt’s eyes turned distant. “I have some other pots boiling.”

David smirked. “Pots or plots?”

“Why does there have to be a difference?”

"Can I help?"

"Tell me about Ryan Lavery."

* * *

Zach sat in his office, completely dumbfounded, though his face betrayed nothing.

He couldn’t believe just how accurately Kurt had predicted this situation, yet it was happening right before him. Erica had barged into his office, tried to throw money at him and, when rejected, offered to marry him in Kurt’s place. Her words and motivations were exactly what Kurt said they would be.

Uncanny.

Erica didn’t like that this man wasn’t paying attention to her. She hated it when any man didn’t pay attention to her. Who did this thug in a somewhat decent suit think he was, that he could just come to town and connive her nephew into a phony marriage? She wouldn’t stand for it.

“This is absolutely ridiculous,” she barked. “This marriage is a total farce and everyone with a modicum of sense will see that, Zach. You’re not even gay!”

“How do you know?”

She blinked in shock. It was a good question and she had no good answer. She knew almost nothing personal about Zach Slater, other than that he was lowlife deadbeat father with a rapist brother.

“Ethan is your son,” she tried, knowing it was a weak excuse at best.

“Who was born when I was barely eighteen, to a girl I had convinced myself I loved because I had never been allowed to love anyone.”

Erica frowned in thought, Kurt’s words to her in the hospital coming to the forefront of her mind. Why had Zach faked his death at eighteen years old? What had happened to him in his father’s house? It was distressing. She didn’t want to think about him as a … person.

If anyone knew about sex, it was her, and she understood there were times when the act had nothing to do with the other person, but about validating something within you, if only to yourself. Sometimes there was a total lack of intimacy, or even respect, between partners. Sometimes it was about affirming you were alive because you felt dead inside.

“Maria,” she said.

“And that worked out so well.”

Erica had read a lot about sexuality after Bianca had come out, both to better understand her daughter and herself. She was enough of a realist to know many of her marriages were not only regrettable, but thoroughly reprehensible. She had used men – as they had her – and had come to realize at a young age that sexuality was a weapon that could be sharply honed.

So, no, Zach fathering Ethan had nothing to do with sexuality, just as Bianca bearing a child of rape took nothing away from the fact she was lesbian. For all she knew, Maria and Ethan’s mother aside, Zach could very well be gay, or bisexual, pansexual, or demisexual. She was a bit disgusted with herself for trying to force a label on him. Bianca would have been appalled.

“And there’s no part of this that’s about getting revenge on Ethan?” she asked, raising a brow.

“Oh, sure, there is!” Zach said easily. “Admittedly, only a small part, but it’s there. Ethan and Kurt barely dated and haven’t been together in almost a year, but you only have to look at my son to see how much he cares about Kurt. So, yeah, absolutely, a portion of this is about taking something from Ethan … like he tried to take my life.”

She pursed her lips, regretting she had ever started this. The more she spoke with this man, the more she empathized with him. She knew what it was to be falsely accused of a crime. She knew what it was when your child turned on you and wanted nothing more than your suffering. She knew what it was to be the town pariah, simply because you wanted to live life on your own terms.

“Why Kurt?” she asked in defeat. “Out of everyone, why him? You could easily marry anyone else to accomplish your goals.”

“True,” he acknowledged, “and I thought about that. It was one of the first questions Kurt asked me. Why him and not, say, Kendall? After all, she more than anyone but me has motive for revenge on Ethan.”

Her eyes widened. It was a sobering statement. He could very well have approached Kendall with this preposterous scheme, and her daughter, being who she was, would probably have enthusiastically agreed. Kurt, at least, was most likely being far more levelheaded about this.

Zach shrugged. "The easy answer? I like him."

"You what?" she demanded.

“You care about him."

“Of course I do,” said a baffled Erica. “He’s my nephew.”

“You barely know him.”

“That’s irrelevant. He’s my family. We protect our families at all costs. Otherwise, what’s the point of living? Not that you would know. You’ll hardly be winning Father of the Year.”

“Because you welcomed Kendall with open arms.”

She fumed. “No, I didn’t, and I’ll regret that for the rest of my life, but at least I finally gave her a chance.”

“You look at Ethan and seen an abandoned child, but he had loving adoptive parents. He went to excellent schools and excelled. He’s bright, strong, and handsome. Why is he so angry? I never knew about him until last year. His mother placed him for adoption, yet he doesn’t resent her. Only me.

“He has known that I am his father far longer than I have. He looks at me and sees everything he believes he should have had, things to which he believes he’s entitled, but when you get right down to it, what is that really about?”

She knew, but said nothing.

He nodded. “Money. He wants the Cambias name and the Cambias fortune because he believes it will solve all of his problems, whatever those might be. He’s looking for a quick fix because he’s too scared to look inside himself to see who he really is.

“Yes, I handled him all wrong and, like you with Kendall, I will always regret that. He did something so despicable to me that it could have resulted in my death. Do I forgive him? Yes, because I am his father. Will I ever tell him that? No, because he's done nothing to deserve it. Will he ever accept that forgiveness if he asked for it? No, because then he’ll have to face up to the man he is, the one he’s so desperate to deny.”

He stood and stared down at her. “This entire town condemned me for Edmund’s murder. They took Ethan’s word as though it were gospel, though he has done nothing to prove himself worthy of that. They thought I, the jilted lover, killed a man because I was so desperate to have Maria. Do I really strike you as a desperate man, Erica?”

She regarded him silently.

“I never confessed. The trial commenced with no real evidence other than Ethan’s word. He lied to the police, the prosecution, his friends, and the woman he loved, all because I didn’t react in the way he expected, the way he felt he deserved. Is that normal? Is that rational? Yet, somehow, I am the villain. This town was so busy raising their pitchforks and torches, they couldn’t even bother to mourn the man who died. Do you know why I never proclaimed my innocence? Because I knew it was a lost cause. I knew no one would believe me.

“But one man did. He looked into my eyes and asked if I was guilty. I told him no and he believed me. He was the only one who bothered to look.”

She looked away.

“Why Kurt? I think the better question is why not? Why not someone who bothers to look beneath the surface of things, someone who tries to find the answers for himself rather than listening to town gossip?

“Why Kurt? He’s intelligent, honest, forthright, and moral. Am I any of those things? Probably not, but I’m smart enough to see a good man for who he is. I’m smart enough to ally myself with a man who will listen, contemplate, and make sound judgments. Am I gay? Am I straight? Does it matter? This is, after all, a marriage of convenience for business purposes. So answer me this, Erica: why are you so bothered?”

Because she had seen them in the hospital. Even that brief encounter screamed their potential. She knew Kendall had noticed it, too. Oddly, Zach and Kurt appeared oblivious to it, or at least in denial of it. But once that denial lifted, or the interest was acknowledged, there was every possibility Kurt could be hurt, and she had to do everything in her power to prevent that.

The more Zach suggested she couldn’t, the more she realized he was a man with real feelings and real hurt, the more he reminded her of her own failings, the more she hated him.


	7. Icebreakers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kurt discusses his rape in frank detail, but it's not overly explicit. However, if you think this will upset you, I ask you not to read it. Thank you.

“Sweetheart,” Erica began, “I know you don’t wish to discuss your meeting with Kurt, and I respect that, but I was hoping you’d be willing to share with me your impressions of him.”

Jack considered the request only briefly, finished chewing his asparagus, and nodded. “Most of what I know Tad has already told you, but sure. What do you want to know?”

She fingered the stem of her water goblet. “Whatever you feel comfortable saying.”

He was automatically suspicious. Erica was not by nature a demure woman, but she was being awfully self-effacing. He deduced two possible scenarios: one, she was nervous about Kurt accepting her; or two, she was hatching some scheme. It was probably a combination of both.

“All right,” he said slowly. “He’s highly intelligent; in fact, I think he’s far more so than he lets on. Extremely guarded, though I don't know if that was something bred into him after the rape. He’s very conscious of security. The door to his loft is hermetically sealed. There’s a videophone by the jamb so he can see who’s on the other side, and the alarm system is elaborate. I noticed three panic buttons, and that was only from the one room I was in.”

She swallowed heavily and looked away. “I’ve often rued it was Bianca and not me who killed Michael Cambias. I know Kurt’s assailant is dead, but I wish I could kill him, as well.”

“I know how you feel,” he said quietly.

“I know you do,” she said, sighing. “Have you spoken with your sister lately?”

“Actually, yes. She called me when the news about Kurt broke, like she did after Bianca was raped. She was horrified our family keeps going through this. She offered advice about what to say to Kurt, as well as what not to say, and told me to pass her number to him if he ever wanted to talk.”

Erica furrowed her brow. “Why _does_ this keep happening to our family? Whose sins are we paying for? How much more penance are we required to make?”

“Oh, honey,” he said sadly, “you know it has nothing to do with anything we’ve done. Your own father set you up to be raped when you were fourteen years old. What could you have ever possibly done in your life that deserved that? _Nothing_. Braeden Lavery raped Chrissy because she was a convenient target; if she hadn’t been there that night, some other poor woman would have been victimized.

“Michael chose Bianca to hurt you and Kendall, not because Bianca had done anything to him. And why did he target your family? Because you had the audacity to say no to him. You had the guts to fight for your company. His attacks had everything to do with him being a degenerate asshole and nothing to do with you or your girls.”

She gave him an absent nod and continued staring out the window. “I feel so helpless,” she said finally, “and you know how much I hate that. Kurt is my family, the son of a sister I never knew and will never know, and I can’t do anything for him.”

“Nonsense. You can be there for him.”

“If he allows it,” she countered. “Let’s be frank, Jack. Kurt admitted on the stand, and later at the hospital to me and Kendall, that he never had any intention of revealing himself to us. He’s been alone since he was sixteen years old, his step-family not included. He indicated that he _did_ want to know us, to form some kind of bond, but I’m worried.”

“About?” he prompted.

She turned to face him. “Kurt is an extremely private person, but I think it goes beyond the rape, or at least predates it. I believe he’s reserved and reclusive by nature. He lost his mother and sister when he was only six years old; he lost his father ten years later. The level of harassment he faced in that town …” she trailed off, shaking her head.

“Bianca never had it easy, but what happened to Kurt in Ohio was monstrous. It was _evil_. Most likely the only sanctuary he ever found was by escaping into his own mind. He’s unfailingly polite, but I believe he extends politeness as a courtesy; respect is an altogether different matter. I doubt he trusts easily, and if you violate that trust, you will never earn it back.”

Jack frowned. “What are you driving at, Erica?”

She heaved a sighed and folded her arms across herself. “You know me, Jack,” she said lowly. “I often act and speak without thinking. I know I can be cruel, but it’s rarely intentional, yet sometimes I just can’t stop myself. I’m terrified I’m going to say or do the wrong thing, and alienate him completely.”

He narrowed his eyes and studied her. “What have you done?”

She set her jaw and glared at the tabletop. “Kurt is engaged to Zach.”

He stared at her, befuddled. “Zach who?”

She gave him a withering look. “Zach Slater, of course!”

“But … _why?_ ”

“That is the question, isn’t it?” she asked, primly folding her hands in her lap. “Why Zach Slater rather than any other man in the free world? Supposedly, it’s about the casinos. Zach’s liquor and gaming licenses have been revoked because he obtained them with a false identity.”

Jack saw the implications immediately. “So if Kurt married Zach, by virtue of their union, Kurt could request new licenses. He would stay married to Zach long enough to transfer the licenses to him. A marriage of convenience, then. I don’t like it, but I can understand it.”

She shook her head. “Zach met him at the hospital, Jack. I saw them together, and so did Kendall. Trust me when I tell you there’s more going on than a simple merger. Whether Kurt or even Zach is conscious of it, it’s obvious if you know to look for it.”

He was stunned. “Zach Slater and another man?”

Her sigh was rueful. “I questioned it. Ethan, Kendall, and Greenlee did, too.’

“My daughter was there?” He was rather cross she hadn’t see fit to warn him. Greenlee always complained she was forever being shut out by the family, but couldn’t be bothered to pass on information like this.

She nodded. “Ethan had gone to the hospital to confront Kendall – with an engagement ring, no less.”

He stared.

“Right,” she nodded. “Of course Kendall declined, but I worry Ethan will worm his way back into her life regardless. Ethan was predictably horrified by the news of Zach and Kurt, and threw every card he could think of to play. He failed.”

“Well, of course Kurt and Zach are going to play up the marriage to Ethan,” Jack reasoned. “I’m sure Zach wants some modicum of vengeance against the son who would have seen him executed.”

She waved a dismissive hand. “Yes, I know, but you didn’t see Kurt and Zach together. They’re smitten, Jack, and I don’t think they have any idea just how much. When Zach stared into Kurt’s eyes, he wasn’t acting; he was mesmerized.”

“Well,” he said slowly, “there’s a lot we don’t know about Zach, darling.”

“I know, so I went to talk to him.”

Jack groaned. “I can’t believe you.”

“You can’t? Excuse me, have we met? I’m _Erica Kane_.”

He laughed. He loved that Erica was so very _Erica_. “What did you discover?”

“I tried what I thought was logic, but he shot down my every assumption with the irrefutable truth that I don’t know him. I tried bribery, but he doesn’t need my money to make his own; he just needs permits. I told him I’d marry him in Kurt’s place, just long enough to give him his precious licenses …”

“You told him what?” Jack drawled, honestly not even surprised.

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. You know it would be nothing more than a farce. I can’t stand him, and he, and everyone else, knows it. So why Kurt, I asked. Why not anyone else on the face of the earth?”

She paused. “Do you know what he said?”

“That he likes Kurt.”

She startled.

“When I went to Kurt’s apartment, he asked me if I thought Zach had killed Edmund. I answered honestly. I told him I wanted to believe Zach guilty because he was a Cambias, and they’re all evil, but Zach really isn’t a Cambias, is he? In fact, he went to extreme lengths to distance himself from that name. The evidence was scant, and I said as much. I then asked Kurt, as he had a previous relationship with Ethan, if Ethan could concoct so great a lie about his own father.”

“What did Kurt say?”

“That he felt no need or desire to defend Ethan. Do you remember when Kurt was leaving the stand after court was adjourned? He stopped at the defense table and spoke briefly with Zach. I think Kurt asked him point blank if he killed Edmund. Zach told him no, and Kurt believed him.”

“What does this have to do with their impending nuptials from hell?” was her exasperated demand.

He raised a brow. “Everyone else assumed Zach was guilty; Kurt asked him directly. Zach was truthful and Kurt sensed that. These are very guarded men, Erica, yet they lowered their defenses for one another. Is that minimal amount of trust enough to construct a marriage? Not for you or me, but for them? Possibly.

“At the end of the day, it’s their marriage. Whether it’s for convenience or some other reason is not our business. And if they do end up falling in love, well, would that really be so terrible? If they could make each other happy, shouldn’t they be allowed to try?”

“I just don’t want Kurt to be hurt,” she murmured.

“I understand that, sweetheart, but stopping him from living won’t keep him safe.”

* * *

Kurt opened his door and ignored the pang in his chest at finding Zach beaming at him. He didn’t know the other man well, but enough to know Zach didn’t smile for the sake of it. He told himself to get it together, and told the pang in his chest to get over it.

He looked down and saw two suitcases. He blinked.

“Where are the rest of your things?”

Zach shrugged. “This is it.”

“And I thought I was minimalist.” Kurt reached down and grabbed a suitcase.

“You don’t have to do that,” Zach said absently, only realizing he made a mistake when he saw Kurt’s jaw set and shoulders stiffen. It wasn’t difficult to figure out why. “Only because I don’t want … ah, shit. I triggered something, didn’t I?”

Kurt heaved a sigh. “The last thing I want to do is bring out my baggage when we’re moving yours in.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, and, for future reference, I hate the word _triggered_. It’s overblown and overused.”

“Not a social justice warrior, then?”

“I believe everyone should be equally represented in our society. I don’t believe, however, that peccadillos should be demonized or every whim catered to.”

“So, live and let live?”

“That works,” Kurt said, “as long as everyone leaves me alone.”

Zach grinned.

Kurt turned and walked inside, beckoning Zach to follow. “I’m often perceived in one of two ways. Either people see me as delicate and a perpetual victim in need of constant saving, or some monolithic automaton who carries the world on his shoulders because he enjoys it.”

“So you’re either a simpering heroine or a cold bastard.”

“That’s about it, yes. Again, I’m sorry. I become annoyed – not triggered – when people think of me as not masculine because I’m gay or because I’m slightly built.”

“Then they’re idiots. First of all, sexuality has nothing to do with masculinity. Second, when’s the last time you looked in a mirror? There’s nothing slight about those shoulders, arms, or legs. You’ve got a small waist, but so does Ethan, and he’s half a foot taller than you. Finally, we don’t know each other well yet, but _delicate_ is the last adjective I’d use to describe you.”

Kurt’s eyes welled and he turned his head. “Thank you,” he said softly.

Zach offered a gruff nod. “Are you sure about me moving in here?”

“I’ve actually been looking forward to it. I’ve been on my own for so long, I’d like to share a space with someone again. It helps that we _don’t_ know each other well. I like that you ask me what I’m thinking or feeling, rather than just assuming or trying to tiptoe around me. Keep doing that.”

Zach saluted him. “Aye, sir!”

Kurt raised a brow. “Kinky. I like it.”

“Got a thing for men in uniform?” Zach leered.

“Yes.”

“Good to know.”

Kurt narrowed his eyes and studied him for a long moment. “Do you know which bedroom you want?” he finally asked.

“The blue one.”

Kurt nodded, unsurprised. Zach was very masculine, and it was a masculine room. Kurt had actually decorated it with Finn in mind, if he ever extended his brother an invitation. It was painted grey with cool blue undertones, a color called Thundercloud, and had heart-of-pine flooring in a driftwood color. The furnishings were mahogany, the standout piece being a large king-sized sleigh bed.

He knew Finn would have liked it, and it would have driven Rachel crazy having to stay there with him, which was a huge bonus. He’d never visited their house, only seen pictures, but it looked like Laura Ashley had vomited over every available surface.

It would be a good room for Zach. He navigated them down the hall and into the room, smiling when Zach regarded it with appreciation.

Zach threw a suitcase on the bed and unlatched it, beginning to unpack his wardrobe. “Any thoughts on the wedding?”

“Not really,” Kurt admitted. “I never thought I’d get married.”

“Never?” Zach said evenly, for he had never considered it either.

“Maybe when I was very young,” Kurt said. “Sometimes I would dream a handsome prince would sweep me off my feet and take me back to his castle, saving me from all my problems. Then I realized I had to save myself, which I much preferred.”

He shrugged. “Besides, I have a castle. It’s drafty.”

Zach slowly looked over his shoulder. “You have a castle?”

“It’s technically classed as a chateau, but yes.”

“Where is it?”

“Pau.”

“That’s in France, right?”

“Yes, in the Pyrenees, about eighty-five kilometers from the Spanish border.”

“Is it empty?”

“I employ a caretaker and a small staff to maintain it, and the rest of my family has an open invitation to use it as they see fit. I offered it to Finn and Rachel for their honeymoon, but they opted for Disney World.”

Zach curled a lip.

Kurt laughed. “Exactly, but that’s who they are, and I love them for it. Well, I love Finn. My relationship with Rachel is more problematic.”

The rest of his family? Zach wondered. “I just realized, we’re getting married and we really know nothing about each other.”

“I thought that was part of the intrigue,” Kurt purred, smirking.

“Oh, it is,” Zach agreed, “but I think we should remedy that somewhat, if only because people will think it strange.”

“Even though we don't care what people think, fair enough. Ask away.”

Zach blinked. “Just like that?”

“I have no secrets from my future husband. Besides, you already know the worst parts of me.”

Zach frowned. “No. I know some of the worst things that have happened to you, and I think you’re amazing for overcoming them.”

Kurt fought the blush.

“Do you have other homes?”

“Two apartments, one in Bordeaux and one in Paris, and a beach house in Nice.”

“I’m surprised you don’t have other real estate investments.”

“Oh, I do,” Kurt said. “Those are just for my personal use, but I own real estate throughout the world. I own a block of townhouses in London, all of which are currently rented. I have a ski chalet in Gstaad that I rent out to pampered celebrities on holiday. I have three commercial properties in Vancouver that are close to development. I have a farm in Tuscany and own a few factories in Germany. I have a private island in Greece.

“There’s more; I own residential and commercial properties in many countries. If there’s a major hub you want to visit, I can probably accommodate you.”

“Good to know. How many languages do you speak?”

Kurt tilted his head. “Languages in which I’m competent or fluent?”

“Both, I guess.”

“I’m fluent in English, of course. I learned French from my mother and German from my father. I taught myself Italian. My friend Santana taught me Spanish, and we then learned Portuguese together. I learned Czech through a pen friend, and I took Russian as my language in high school because I had already learned the others offered. I continued studying Russian in college, and added Hindi, in which I’m competent but not fluent.

“I learned Mandarin from my friend Mike, Hebrew from my friend Artie, and Korean from Tina; I’m at an intermediate level in those languages, and I can only speak them, not read or write them. I can read and write Latin and Ancient Greek.”

“Jesus,” Zach muttered.

“I have a facility with languages, but it helps that my father was bilingual, as are most of my friends. My mother spoke four languages, and my grandmother twelve. I’d like to learn more. Do you speak any other languages?”

Zach blinked and shook his head to clear it. “I’m fluent in Spanish, and passable in Italian and French.”

“Then why are you so surprised I can speak many languages?”

“My French and Italian are _bad_ ,” Zach admitted. “I can comprehend much more easily than I can converse. My Spanish is good, but my accent is dreadful.”

“Well, we’ll fix that soon enough.”

Zach raised a brow.

Kurt grinned. “Okay, what else? I know about your father and brother. Any other siblings? Your mother?”

“I don’t have any other siblings I’m aware of, though I wouldn’t put it past my father. My mom died when I was five.”

Kurt offered a somber nod. “I was six when my mother died. My father married his girlfriend on his deathbed, so I have a stepmother, Carole. We’re not close, but I love her and try to talk with her at least once a month. My stepbrother is her son, Finn Hudson, who’s married to his high school sweetheart, Rachel Berry. They have a daughter and a son, Cosette and Caleb.”

“Cosette?”

“Rachel lives, breathes, and poops musical theater.”

“Yikes.”

“Very much so.”

“Do you like musical theater?”

“I do, but I’m not a fanatic anymore. I loved it when I was younger because the music told a story and invited me in as a participant. It made me feel less lonely and even acknowledged in some small ways. All good songs tell a story.”

“Do you sing?”

“I can. I'm professionally trained, but I no longer perform. I sing when I’m moved.”

Zach sensed this was a touchy subject and decided to sidestep it. “Are you and Finn close?”

Kurt hesitated for a long moment. “Yes,” he finally said, “but that stems from growing up together in a fishbowl. We know the best and worst parts of each other, and know exactly which buttons to push to bring those parts out. We love each other dearly, but we can’t be around each other for any significant length of time.”

Zach nodded.

“Were you and Michael close?” Kurt asked quietly.

“When we were kids, yeah. It wasn’t easy growing up in that house, and we only had each other to get through it. He knew I was desperate to get out and he helped me fake my death. The worst thing I’ve ever done was not take him with me. My father ruined him.”

Kurt decided to leave that box unopened until Zach wanted to discuss it further. “What kind of music do you like?”

“Rock, blues, country, opera. Like you, I like the story.”

“Do you sing?”

“Only when no one can hear me.”

Kurt laughed. “Play any instruments?”

“My father made me take piano. I wasn’t very good. I can strum a guitar, but not well. Better at the drums.”

“Finn plays the drums. He’s excellent, even though he’s never really believed it. I play piano.”

“And I’m sure you’re a master.”

Kurt snorted. “I’m pretty good.”

They looked at each other a long while.

“Does the age difference bother you?” Zach finally asked. “I mean, I’m Ethan’s father.”

“And I’m older than Ethan. How old are you, anyway?”

“Forty-three.”

“So, fifteen years. No, it doesn’t bother me at all. I like that you’re older. That means you know who you are and have enough life experience not to apologize for it. We’re both old enough to know we can’t change each other, and secure enough in ourselves not to try.”

Zach offered a half-smile.

“I like that you’re settled. You not only have a career, but are successful. You have your own money and don’t need mine. I never much thought about getting married, but I always believed that, if I did, my husband would be older. Not because I need to be shepherded, but because I always felt more grounded and mature than my peers.”

“Kids?”

Kurt wrinkled his nose. “I don’t know. It’s not something I've ever really considered. Rachel has two fathers who used a surrogate, and she’s the most annoying person I know. Pretty strong argument for birth control. I’m not a very patient person, but I can be for the right situation. I don’t know if children would be right for me, though. I didn’t like kids when I was a kid.”

“What about Finn’s children?”

Kurt shrugged. “I love them, of course, because they’re his, but I don’t really know them. I’ve never spent much time with Cosette, and I’ve never even met Caleb.” He paused. “Now that I think about it, they’re the only ones I know, other than Bianca, with children. Most of my friends are single and childless. I suppose I’m not against children, but I haven’t really formed an opinion on whether or not I want them. Right now, I’m leaning towards no.”

Zach nodded.

“What about you?”

“You know Ethan.”

“I also know you were never given the chance to be a father to him. That was taken from you. Would you have wanted to be his father, had you the opportunity?”

Zach sighed and sat on the bed. “I really don’t know. I was barely eighteen when Ethan was born. I loved his mother, or thought I did, but we were kids. I’d like to say that, if I could go back in time, I’d be the best father to Ethan I could be, but how do I know how well I’d do?

“I love Miranda. I love holding her and kissing her head and smelling that sweet baby scent, but that’s far different from being responsible for someone’s life and raising them to be a good person. When I’m tired or bored or cranky, I can hand Miranda back to Bianca. Now there’s someone who was born to be a parent.

“I’m not a good person and can be very selfish. I can’t say Ethan would have been better off with me, because there’s a strong possibility that wouldn’t have been true. He feels I denied him life as a Cambias, but it was a monstrous life and, from everything I’ve learned, his adoptive parents adored him and gave him things I probably never could.”

Kurt nodded and began hanging Zach’s shirts in the walk in closet. “Favorite food?”

“Anything spicy. I love ethnic cuisines, but am always happy with a nice steak. Burgers are good, too. You?”

“I have a major weakness for pasta. I’d eat it for every meal, if I could. I’ve never met a vegetable I didn’t like. I love ethnic foods, too. Thai and Indian are favorites. I’m not a picky eater in terms of being adventurous, but I don’t like fatty foods. Liquor?”

“Love it.”

Kurt laughed. “Likewise. I’m a partner in a few vineyards, but I’m not a wine snob. There are some very good wines under fifteen dollars that come with a screw cap, and they make me happy. I like a lot of mixed drinks, but I don’t care for shots. In terms of spirits, tequila and vodka. I’m guessing whiskey and scotch for you?”

“You guess correctly. So, what do I need to know about living here?”

“Nothing’s off limits,” Kurt replied with a shrug. “I’m not hiding any secret rooms or stashes of porn.”

“That’s disappointing,” Zach lamented.

Kurt burst out laughing. It was loud and deep and full-bodied, and sent a thrill up Zach’s leg. He'd never heard Kurt laugh like that before, and he felt rather proud of himself for eliciting it.

“What I mean,” Kurt said, “is that you’re welcome to use anything here. Help yourself to anything in the kitchen. Read any book you like. You’re invited to peruse my music and movie collection at your leisure.”

“What kind of movies do you like?”

“Almost every genre but romantic comedies. I adored them when I was a kid, but now I just find them insipid. I love a lot of foreign film, particularly French and German. I love British drama and mystery; I have subscriptions to Acorn and Britbox, as well as the major streaming services. Superhero movies are okay, but I just like the spectacle. That said, outside of _Wonder Woman_ , I definitely prefer Marvel.”

“Cool. Horror?”

Kurt’s eyes lighted. “I _love_ horror movies. They’re so cathartic, and I admit I enjoy watching stupid people get killed in creative and deserving ways. I don’t like torture porn, though. It’s just a few rungs above snuff films. Martial arts movies are awesome.”

Zach raised his brows in surprise and delight. “Sports?”

“Mostly solo stuff. I took gymnastics and figure skating when I was a kid. I love the artistry of them. I’m more than happy to watch tennis. Bowling bores me tears unless I’m playing it, then I play to win. Golf is just men in ugly pants walking. I like watching soccer, but have no desire to play it. Football was revered in my town, so I despise it. Love hockey.”

Zach’s eyes became pinwheels. “Red Wings.”

“Caps.”

They smiled at each other.

“My relationship with hockey is weird,” Kurt admitted.

“How so?”

Kurt looked down. “My dad loved it. We used to watch together. It reminds me of him, in mostly good ways, but some bad." He shrugged and began twisting his hands. " _He_ was a hockey player.”

Zach instantly knew who _he_ was. He said nothing. He knew it wasn’t his place.

“He’s dead. He killed himself the next year.”

Zach remained silent.

“It didn’t help. It didn’t change anything. I don’t know why he did it, and I don’t care. Maybe he felt remorse. Maybe he couldn’t handle living a lie. Maybe he didn’t want to be gay. It doesn’t matter now.”

He sat on the bed, making sure the suitcase kept he and Zach apart. “I was fifteen. I didn’t know anything about him, other than that he hated me because I knew who I was and wasn’t ashamed of it. I never knew he was gay. I never thought, for a single moment, that his obsession with me wasn't simple homophobia; that all of his harassment and abuse was something altogether different. Something dark.

“I wanted a boyfriend, but accepted I probably wouldn’t have one until I left Lima. I was fine with that, but it was a driving force in my ruthless pursuit of education. I hated that town for hating me, for never really understanding why they did, and I wanted to get out as soon as possible.

“By sophomore year, he realized his taunts and threats and beatings meant nothing to me. It was just something I had to endure until I could leave. I didn’t like it, but I accepted it. I knew fighting back would only make it worse. After the first few times I went to teachers and the administration, I knew nothing would be done. They thought I deserved it or had invited it.

“So he began attacking my friends. He knew I had stopped fighting for myself because I no longer cared, so he studied me and learned my weak points. I will always stand up for my friends, though it often was not reciprocated. After a long time, and much therapy, I became okay with that. I realized it had little to do with me and everything to do with their terror of being targeted, of being ostracized. I don’t like it, but I understand it.

“Finn was an easy target. He’s physically powerful, only slightly shorter than Ethan, but incredibly insecure. Like most teenage boys, he was terrified of being labeled gay. Not because he was, but because he wasn’t entirely sure that he wasn’t. His first girlfriend, who is one of my best friends now, dominated him completely. His second, Rachel, made him the center of her world, and part of him liked being an object of obsession.

“Finn wanted to protect me, but was scared of how it would be perceived. He was sixteen years old. I don’t hate him for it and never did, but I don’t think he’ll ever be able to forgive himself.

“Santana was, at the time, a lesbian deeply in the closet, but also the fiercest and most volatile person I’ve ever known. No one at the school messed with her, so he knew better than to try. She and I weren’t close at the time, and I’m grateful for that, because I wouldn’t have been able to hide it from her. She would’ve killed him, and I would never want that for her.

“Artie was my best friend from childhood. He was in a car accident when he was eight and became paraplegic. He had been targeted for that by the bullies since elementary school. As much as I know he loved me, he often threw me under the bus because, already ostracized for one thing, he didn’t want it doubled because of something else. He also wanted to score points with our male peers, many of whom thought of him as less than a man. He’s one of my only friends who didn’t reach out after my testimony. I’m sure he’s ashamed, but I’m not angry with him. I never expected anyone to fight my battles for me.

“Mercedes was one of the few black students at the school. Homophobia was rampant because it was more socially acceptable at the time, but the undercurrents of racism were always there. She talked a big game, but never followed through. Santana always thought her a coward but, again, we were kids and we were targets. I was never angry with Mercedes, but I deeply resented her insistence that she was my best friend, when that was never the case. I may have been hers, but she wasn’t mine. She was controlling and manipulative; for the most part, I ignored it because I realized she had so little control in her life and her small victories were always Pyrrhic.

“It was when he went after Tina that I knew I could no longer passively interfere. Tina was always smart and witty and acerbic, but deeply introverted. In a town as whitewashed as Lima, any difference raises a red flag. She was adopted from Korea when she was an infant, but it was known. Her parents told her early because they had to, before someone else did.

“Her father was Korean and her mother Jewish. Interracial couples were not looked upon with any favor, and Asian men are often emasculated for myriad prejudiced reasons. Rachel, Noah, and Artie were also Jewish, but Tina always stood out at synagogue. In every aspect of her life, she was marginalized, made to feel Other. She went so far as to fake a stutter just so people wouldn’t talk to her, but that backfired eventually, too.

“When he went for Tina, I intervened. Later that day, he shouldered me into a locker and made his usual threats and imprecations. For whatever reason, I’d finally had it. I followed him into the locker room and gave back everything he’d ever lobbed at me. I called him pathetic, morally and intellectually inferior, physically repulsive, and a loser who would never get out of Lima.

“I wasn’t surprised when he punched me, or when he tackled me. It was only when he flipped me over and began tearing at my pants that I finally understood.”

Zach closed his eyes in horror, the tears slipping out from beneath his lids.

“I didn’t know pain like that was possible. I thought I would die from it. Later on, I wished I had. It didn’t last long. He was too nervous and excited. The worst part was the anticipation, knowing it was coming and knowing I couldn’t stop it. I felt his sweat dripping onto my face, which he had pushed into the floor. His rancid breath panted into my ear. He slobbered on me when he tried to kiss me.

“It took less than ten minutes for my entire life to change. When he was finished, he laid on top of me, alternately crying and shouting, apologizing and blaming me. That lasted longer than the rape. By that time, I was barely aware of anything. I just wanted to go home. The worst was when he finally got up. I could feel him looming over me, staring down at me, and then he told me he loved me, that he always had, and that he knew I could love him if I just gave him the chance. But I never did, and he was tired of waiting for me.

“He called me Fancy.”

Zach repressed the sob bubbling up in his chest.

“People saw me as I left the school. My face was bruised, my clothes torn and bloody. That was nothing new. I don’t think it will ever cease to amaze me just how uncaring or oblivious people can be. So I drove home, and I took a shower, and I made dinner for my father.”

“How,” Zach rasped, “how could you go on?”

Kurt turned and gave him a puzzled look. “What else was I going to do?”

* * *

Zach put his belongings away on autopilot, trying and failing to process what he had just been told. Kurt had seemed relieved, or maybe unburdened, that Zach now knew the most painful event of his life. Zach was glad for that. He wanted Kurt to trust him, to confide in him.

Kurt scarpered off to make them dinner, needing a respite of his own.

His respect for the other man, already teetering at a high level, soared and crashed down over him. He couldn’t imagine it. Could barely posit it. His father’s house had been one of horrors, but nothing that could ever approach that level of violence and sadism. That kind of evil.

He had glimpses of understanding. His father had been a sociopath. He had never loved his wife or children, seeing them only as appendages of his greatness. He manipulated them constantly, trying and sometimes succeeding in turning them against each other. They were merely adornments, trophies of his glory, and had no right to think or believe anything he hadn’t programmed into them.

He felt guilt over his mother’s death and for abandoning Michael, but never for escaping his father. He couldn’t imagine what it must have been like for Kurt, trying to escape an entire town.

The delicious aromas from the kitchen soon had him salivating, and he decided to take a quick shower before offering to help Kurt with his preparations.

It was the least he could do, the very least, for he had no clue how to help his future husband in any other way.

* * *

Kurt hummed softly under his breath as he grilled the asparagus, keeping a watchful eye on the scalloped potatoes bubbling in the gratin dish in the wall oven. The larger oven beneath the range held the roast beef and the braised carrots. He would wait to prepare the salad until just before serving. Nothing was worse than wilted lettuce. Except for Rachel.

He frowned when a knock announced a visitor. Pursing his lips, he removed the asparagus from the grill plate and placed it in a chafing dish. He wiped his hands and gave them a quick spritz of hand sanitizer, tossing a dish towel over his shoulder.

If he were honest, he didn’t like that so many people knew where he lived. This was Zach’s home now – Jesus that felt weird, even to say in his own head. Kendall was fine. He assumed that, though she had yet to put in an appearance, Erica knew where to find him, and he was all right with that. The same for Jackson, as he was Erica’s fiancé.

He wasn’t thrilled that Tad Martin, Ryan Lavery, and David Hayworth knew his address. He wasn’t worried about it, really; just annoyed.

The annoyance increased with each step toward the door. He had been in Pine Valley for over a year now and had managed not to have any visitors. Now, in the span of only a month, it felt like someone was always invading his private space.

He looked at the video screen and heaved a sigh, before raising his eyes to the ceiling. “This is how I know you’re not real,” he said heavenward. He opened the door. “What is it, Ethan? _Something?_ ”

Ethan had already opened his mouth to announce his displeasure, but snapped it shut with an audible clack of teeth and gave an owlish blink. It wasn’t like Kurt to be so irascible. He was always unfailingly polite.

“I wanted to apologize for my awful words to you at the hospital. They were completely uncalled for and untrue. I spoke them in the heat of the moment because I was angry and hurt, but that is no excuse.”

“No, it’s not,” Kurt agreed, “but I understand the circumstances and forgive you. I know you, Ethan, and while you’ve changed since we were together, you have never been a malicious person.”

Ethan closed his eyes and blew out a soft puff of relief. “Thank you,” he said earnestly. “I truly am so very sorry.”

“Apology accepted and, while I appreciate it, we both know that’s not why you’re really here. You could have said it with flowers, so what do you want?”

Ethan snapped open his eyes and stared. “Kurt, you can’t be serious about marrying Zach. The very idea is absurd.”

Kurt raised a brow. “As absurd as you proposing to Kendall once she got wise to your many lies?” He delivered this with a perfect imitation of Ethan’s posh English accent.

Ethan blinked again, this time in surprise. “I didn’t know you could do that. Well done.”

“Would you like me to repeat it in Received Pronunciation?”

Ethan gaped. “No, thank you, and please don’t avoid the subject. Kurt, what is really going with you and Zach?”

“None of your business,” came a booming voice from behind Kurt.

Ethan scowled and looked past Kurt, only to find his own father standing there very wet and almost completely naked, save a minuscule towel. Color rose high in his cheeks, eyes sparking with rancor, lips flattening until they appeared to be nothing but a slash of scar tissue across his face.

Kurt blinked slowly and, with even less speed, turned around in both fear and anticipation. He had the feeling Zach was being very naughty. When he finally completed the maneuver, he had to struggle not only _not_ to laugh uproariously, but to keep his tongue from lolling out of his mouth.

His first estimation of Zach’s body was apparently woefully inadequate because, to quote Mercedes Jones, _got damn!_

Zach stood there in all of his wet, almost naked glory. Beads of water slowly trickled down an obscenely muscular, hairless chest, over a taught stomach, and into the _bath mat_ he was holding around his waist. He must have been in too much of a rush to grab an _actual_ towel.

Kurt barely repressed a snort. Yeah, right. No _way_ was that an accident.

That mat did little to cover what was an impressive bulge, and Kurt was more than happy to note Zach’s legs were just as strong and muscled as the rest of him. His hair had grown slightly over the month, and was already beginning to curl because of the water and steam. His skin was deeply tanned, completely golden, and seemed to glow from within.

Holy shit, was Zach Slater one delicious man. The term _hunk_ had to have been inspired by him.

“Are you all right, _cariño?_ ” Zach softly asked, terribly serious.

Kurt’s eyes widened, knowing Zach was ready to throw Ethan from the room. He needed to defuse the situation quickly, but also wanted to have a bit of fun.

He raised a brow, ogled his intended, and then leered. “I’m just fine, _papi_.”

Zach smirked. Kendall would have paid gold ducats to witness this.

Ethan was driven to near apoplexy. “This is … you two … absolutely …”

“There’s a sentence in there somewhere just dying to get out,” Zach observed.

“Kurt!” Ethan barked, drawing in a deep breath to deliver some untoward and inappropriate tirade.

Kurt threw his arm behind him and pushed Ethan out the door, his eyes never leaving Zach’s practically pornographic display. He couldn’t have looked away if he tried and, honestly, he really wasn’t interested in trying too hard.

“Not now, Ethan,” he said, voice sultry and all breathy catch. “Your arrival was … unexpected. Again, I thank you for your apology, but next time, call.” He threw the door closed and locked it, ignoring Ethan’s pounding.

He shook his head in amusement and wagged a finger in scolding. “Bad Daddy.”

Zach snorted.

“Go get dressed. Dinner’s almost ready.”

Zach nodded but hesitated for a moment. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

“I really am. You know I’m not delicate.”

Zach nodded again, turned, and sauntered down the hall, pulling the mat away and wondering if Kurt would enjoy the view.

Kurt did.


	8. Ghosts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for not posting sooner, but April and May are very difficult months for me due to personal reasons. Also, I'm essential personnel during the pandemic and work has been a bit crazy. Thank you for your understanding and patience.

His eyes opened slowly and narrowed in confusion before he took a breath and remembered where he was. Sunlight was streaming through the wall of glass behind him while, before him, Netflix was asking if he was still there.

Zach couldn’t remember the last time he had enjoyed such a peaceful sleep. Ironic, considering it had passed with him sitting up on a couch. Yet, there he was, without so much as a crick in his neck and a warm figure burrowed into his side.

His lips quirked up in a smile as he looked over to find a head nestled against his shoulder.

He and Kurt had fallen asleep last night while watching a _Scream_ marathon. That they both could so easily pass into slumber while watching a string of violent, bloody deaths probably suggested something deeply disturbing about them. Mutual psychopathy, perhaps, or maybe relief they for once weren’t the targets of another’s rage.

Zach was startled by his feeling of contentment, of the rightness of Kurt pressed against him, so he did nothing for several long moments but enjoy it.

He was saddened the unrelenting guarded look on Kurt’s face persisted even during sleep. Despite Kurt’s disclosure the night previous, despite whatever tentative bond they had formed, Kurt was still wary of the world around him. Zach knew this was always likely to be the case. Still, that Kurt was relaxed enough in his company to fall asleep and cuddle with him made him happy.

Zach Slater was many things, but a fool was not among them. He might have been acting oblivious to recent developments, but he was cognizant of them. He had feelings for Kurt, and they were real and strong, though still very new. For the first time in a long time, however, he was also afraid. He was afraid of what these feelings meant, of what Kurt would soon come to mean to him, and that Kurt could be used against him.

He wasn’t afraid of Kurt, of course. It was much more likely he would end up hurting the younger man. Zach knew he was brash, often indifferent, and spoke unflinching truth without regard to those around him, but he couldn’t imagine any scenario in which he would inflict harm upon his intended.

But he had enemies, lots of them; some unknown even to him. He had lived his life a certain way these past twenty-five years, and knew eventually there would be a reckoning. If anyone looked at him right now, they would see the easiest way to cause him pain was to hurt Kurt Hummel.

That was something Zach could never allow; so, no matter what he was feeling or hoping, all he knew was to protect Kurt. That meant continuing to feign ignorance, to committing to being nothing more than good friends united in a business assignation. And if his heart broke in the process, well, it was nothing less than he deserved – but he wouldn’t allow Kurt to be broken with him.

Jesus, Kurt was beautiful.

He had been conscious of it the moment he had laid eyes on the man in the courtroom, but it hadn’t struck him the way it was now. He had always appreciated beauty in whatever form it took – art; music; music; film; and people, male or female, old or young, wise or innocent.

He appreciated the beauty of Erica Kane, both her genetic blessings and the courage she had shown under pressure and in battle. She was a study in dichotomy; considered but impetuous, indifferent yet caring, wise but foolish, and would only grow more lovely with the passage of time, as would her daughters.

Bianca had more grace and fortitude at her young age than any crone who had witnessed the rising of multiple generations. Kendall roared fire and passion like a dragon, yet possessed more compassion than anyone knew or would ever comprehend.

It was not difficult to place Kurt with them, the long-missing piece in a puzzle so many tried and failed to solve. The fit was seamless yet surprising. The legacy of the Kane Women was much touted and admired, yet Kurt brought a bracing masculinity that was both welcomed and needed.

That night in his office with Erica made clear just how much she already loved Kurt, that she would go to the wall in defense of him against any and all enemies. Kendall was similar, but as she and Kurt were so close in age, there was a more contemporary and egalitarian sense between them. And Bianca – the youngest, the wisest, and the one who appeared the most vulnerable but was truly the strongest – was the rallying point.

Their bond would continue to grow and deepen, and woe betide anyone who tried to hinder or obstruct it. Zach knew he was included in that. No matter what Kurt felt for him – whatever that might have been or would become – he would put his family first. That was simply his nature.

That meant accepting Erica, Kendall, and Bianca – as well as their extended family – would be a part of his life for the foreseeable future, and that was okay. He just had to ensure that he never put Kurt in the position of having to choose between them.

Still, he couldn’t deny …

“So beautiful,” he murmured.

Kurt shifted and butted his head against Zach’s arm, until it was raised and settled over him.

“What am I going to do about you?” Zach whispered.

His display last night had been calculated to enrage Ethan, but he couldn’t deny it was also designed to titillate Kurt. He wanted Kurt to find him attractive. He wanted Kurt to consider him more than just a friend. He wanted Kurt to want him.

This wasn’t supposed to be happening. Their marriage was meant to be a merger, a convergence of mutual goals and exigencies. It was about the absence of romance, not the start of one.

Was he gay? Well, no – his romances with Hannah and Maria saw to that – but, for the first time in his life, Zach wasn’t sure he was entirely straight. He couldn’t be, if these were the thoughts he was entertaining. More concerning was how unbothered he was about them. He had no prejudices with regard to sexuality and couldn’t understand why anyone did, but he had never considered his own might just be _alternative_.

Last night Kurt had said he liked that Zach was settled and sure of who he was, but that wasn’t the case anymore, was it? He didn’t know how to describe his sexuality, even to himself, because he had never really considered it. He had loved the women he had because of the people they were, not just because they were women. It stood to reason, then, that his feelings for Kurt was because Kurt was _Kurt_ , not just that he was a man. Kurt was a beautiful, intelligent, witty, urbane, and unbelievably brave man, and Zach found that deeply attractive.

Yet Kurt _was_ a man, and that was surprisingly intriguing. He was attracted not only to Kurt’s mind and personality, but his face and body. He enjoyed the way Kurt’s clothes were tailored, to display a lithe, strong body Zach wished to explore. He liked that, regardless of what Kurt or anyone else believed, Kurt was masculine. He liked the chest of hard planes and broad set of shoulders and the biceps almost bursting through slim-fit shirts.

He hadn’t thought about sex with Kurt in anything but the furthest abstraction, but when he did, that Kurt was _very_ male made those thoughts all the more alluring – but it was the idea of being close to him, of spending his _life_ with him, that was most enticing.

It was also terrifying. He had long ago mastered his emotions, sublimating them so expertly it was almost impossible to discern if he had any. That one person, definitely male and almost completely unknown to him, could so unseat his cold demeanor was as frightening as it was disarming.

He had to protect himself. He had to protect the heart he was often accused of not having. And he had to protect Kurt at all costs – especially from him.

“Such heavy thoughts,” Kurt muttered, trying and failing to stifle a yawn. “Are you all right, _papi_? Did you sleep well?”

Unwillingly, a smile ghosted across Zach’s face. That Kurt had used the nickname privately and not just to antagonize Ethan was more untroubling than it should have been.

“I’m fine, _mi cariño._ I’m just fine.”

What worried him was just how true that was. Because it wouldn’t last. It never did.

* * *

Zach stood in the doorway of the kitchen, leaning against the jamb and watching Kurt prepare them breakfast. He had acknowledged he liked looking at Kurt and now decided to study the other man’s movements.

His first experience with Kurt had seen him stomping into a courtroom with rage pouring off him in waves. When he had left that room, Kurt glided without a care in the world, clearing his face of the maelstrom of emotions overwhelming him. He had seen Kurt float through the hospital like a wraith, unsure of himself and his position there, trying to be unobtrusive as possible.

He had seen Kurt strut, stride, stalk, and prance. Now, in these unguarded moments, Zach realized just how unassuming Kurt truly was. Every motion was precise and economical, yet fluid and graceful. At his core, Kurt was a still person.

Erica flitted. Kendall prowled. Greenlee was emphatic. Ethan hovered. They were frenetic.

Kurt, like Bianca and Zach himself, was centered, yet aware of everything going on around them. They had become the observers because they had once been the hunted. He knew Kurt was conscious of his gaze, yet appeared entirely unruffled by the scrutiny. Whether or not that was true was beside the point; Zach knew it would be a long time before he would learn to navigate the depth of those still waters.

Zach crossed his arms and forced his eyes to remain on the back of Kurt’s head, rather than travel down as they wanted. “What are your plans today?”

Kurt turned and gave him a slight smile, handing Zach a mug of coffee. “I’m touring Fusion with Greenlee.”

Zach quirked a brow. “What are you up to with her?”

“I’m not quite sure. There’s something about her I like, though I don’t know what. There’s also something about her I _don’t_ like; I can’t put my finger on it but, if I could, I would have to wash it.”

Zach chuckled. “So, a fact-finding mission?”

Kurt nodded as he flipped an omelet. “That’s a good term for it. I can see how much she and Kendall love each other as the sisters they’ll soon be, but I’ve followed their exploits in the press. They turn on one another with regularity. I want to understand why.”

“Do they remind you of your relationship with Finn?”

Kurt stiffened, blinking rapidly. “Not until you suggested it. Wow.”

“I didn’t mean to offend.”

Kurt shook his head. “You didn’t. I told you my relationship with Finn is complicated, but I don’t think I realized until just now how much I miss him.”

“When’s the last time you spoke with him?”

“A week ago? Ten days? I’m not sure.” Kurt frowned. “I should be sure. He’s my brother.”

“Tell me about your brother.”

A smile flitted across Kurt’s face. “Finn Hudson is the most ridiculous person I’ve ever met in my life. He is the most frustrating and exasperating person I know – and that’s saying something, considering his wife. He … Finn was the first person, for better or worse, ever to get under my skin.”

He plated the omelet and turned to look at Zach. “He still lives there. He’s become part of me.” He pressed his lips tightly together before sighing. “And when the world gets dark and I get scared, I think of Finn and how much he loves me, and I feel safe again.”

“Have you ever told him that?” Zach asked softly.

Kurt blushed and turned away, shaking his head. “Not with those words, but Finn knows I love him, just as I know he loves me. We make sure to tell each other that whenever we speak.”

“Maybe the words are no longer enough.”

“I can’t deal with Rachel,” Kurt quietly said. “She’s not a malicious person, but she’s incredibly thoughtless and callous where I’m concerned. That hasn’t necessarily changed because she’s married to my brother or is the mother of his children. I accepted long ago that I would have to deal with her for the rest of my life. I don’t like it, but I accept it. I try to limit our interactions as much as possible.”

“You really dislike her,” Zach observed. “What is about her you find so distasteful?”

“Can you let this go, please?”

“If you’re asking me to, absolutely.”

Kurt tilted his head. “Just like that?”

“Just like that. You don’t owe me any explanations.”

Kurt stared at him for a brief moment. “Thank you,” he finally said, as he began to set the table. He was silent for several long moments before sighing again. “It would be so easy to dismiss her if it were just a matter of clashing personalities, but it’s more than that.

“I’ve known Rachel, or at least been aware of her, since we were very young children. We didn’t properly meet until high school, but we attended the same dance studio and afterschool activities, though we never interacted. I always felt her eyes on me, studying me, like I was a slide under a microscope. We didn’t share many classes in high school, but in those we did, I was very conscious of her gaze.”

Zach sat down at the table. “What was she looking for?”

“It took me a while to figure that out, as well as why her attention was so unsettling. At first I thought it was because I was so obviously gay. Rachel was born to a surrogate and raised by two fathers. I believed her interest in me was as some kind of mirror, trying to see herself in what was a very small, very heteronormative fishbowl.”

“But that wasn’t the case.”

“No. Then I wondered if she was jealous of my academic prowess. Rachel was a very driven student, but more clever than intelligent. She made the honor roll every term, but never took advanced classes because she knew she would never place first.”

“Because you would.”

“She couldn’t compete with me academically. I was never arrogant with regard to my intelligence because I knew it was nothing more than an expressed sequence of genes. I was smart because my parents were smart, and they encouraged me constantly. I took every honors and advanced-placement class the school offered, and never had to open a textbook. I took concurrent courses at the community college and found them similarly underwhelming.

“Many people didn’t like that school was so easy for me, including the cliques that should have welcomed me. Later I realized they had long ago united under a common banner and had no room for me. They were already ostracized and ridiculed, but it was for a singular trait, whereas I had been defined by more than one. I wasn’t Smart Kid; I was Smart _Gay_ Kid.”

Zach curled his fists under the table.

“Everyone now tells me how they envied my independence, my refusal to go along to get along, my pride in myself and my inability to compromise that to placate others.” Kurt shook his head sadly. “I never had any other choice.”

“You must have been so lonely.”

Kurt tried to laugh, but instead choked on a sob bubbling up from his chest, one he had been suppressing for years. “Yeah, but I was okay with it because I made myself be okay. And I had Tina and Brittany; and Artie when he could be bothered. They made me more … human.”

Zach furrowed his brow. “You didn’t think of yourself as human?”

Kurt shrugged a shoulder. “It was easier not to. That town didn’t see me as human anyway, so I learned to shut off my emotions. It wasn’t just that I buried them, but that I refused to acknowledge they existed at all. And it worked; far too well.”

Zach swallowed heavily. “Kurt …”

“Every feeling was an opportunity to be attacked. I developed a flat affect early on, and many people simply thought me an automaton. I was gay, but never dated, so they assumed I was asexual and thus even more abnormal. Remember, these are people who often confused homosexuality with transgenderism or pedophilia. It couldn’t be that I just liked boys; there had to be some pathology or demon behind it.”

“You never dated?”

“I fell in love, or what I thought was love.” Kurt raised his eyes. “Finn.”

“Oh, god,” Zach muttered.

“And all of that buried emotion erupted to the surface. I couldn’t deal with it. I knew Finn wasn’t gay. I knew I never had a chance with him. Looking back, I realize now that I never wanted a chance with him. I wanted him precisely because I knew I could never have him. It wasn’t even about Finn; he was simply the boy who had hurt me the least.

“I not only believed I would never find better than that, but that I truly didn’t deserve better. As much as I blame that town for what it did to me, I know that how I chose to respond to it damaged me in ways Lima never could.”

“And Rachel?”

“Rachel knew that, and she exploited it. As I said, she’s clever – and was conniving in the extreme. I was always very aware the things that set me apart, my intelligence and looks, were results of a genetic lottery and had very little to do with me. But the one thing in which I took the most pride, at which I excelled because I worked so hard for it, was my voice.

“It was the only thing that brought me joy. It was how I defined myself, because everyone else defined me by things not in my control. I believed my voice would prove to everyone that I was special, that I had value, that I was more than just Gay Kid, or Smart Gay Kid, or Lady Face, or Porcelain, or Princess, or Fancy.”

Zach flinched.

“I might have the _ability_ to sing because my mother had that same ability, but the delivery was mine. I worked hard for it. I bled for it. Yes, I wanted attention and accolades, but I also wanted to show people that if they could bother, even for a moment, to look beneath the surface, they might discover the humanity they denied me.

“I was proud of my voice – and, yes, sometimes that pride turned to arrogance – but it was deserved. No one in Glee could do what I could. No one had the range I did. No one could sing the styles I could. For once, I was unique for all the right reasons.”

Zach’s eyes turned flat. “Until Rachel.”

“She has an amazing voice, and she can do things with it that I, at that time, could not do with mine. As much as she believed otherwise, a lot of that was simply down to physical maturity. I was born premature; I was the shortest in my class and the last to enter puberty. My voice was high, but my range was huge. I could hit notes in the bass register all the way through whistle register, and I had barely begun my vocal journey. I’ve yet to reach my vocal maturity, and probably won’t for another ten years.

“Hitting notes is not the same as singing them. I had the range and perfect pitch, but my voice was thin. It was clear and clean, but thin. Popular music, at that time, revolved around divas, and Rachel emulated them perfectly. She had mapped her chest voice well and knew exactly what she could do with it. She could pour an unbelievable amount of power into a song, and that’s what everyone wanted.”

Zach pulled a face. “You mean belting, right? Isn’t that just a synonym for loud?”

Kurt erupted in laughter. “Basically, yes, and if you don’t do it with proper technique, you can destroy your voice.”

“So, they thought that because she was louder, she was better?”

“I would be the last to decry her talent. Rachel’s voice is extraordinary by any measure, but there were others who were just as good, or had at least the same potential. Mercedes and Santana equaled Rachel in ability, but she had better technique. She also had the confidence, or unbelievable gall, to insist she was the best performer.”

“And was she?”

“She was one of the best, yes. Was she the best? That’s a matter of opinion. Many people clearly thought so, but I wasn’t among them. Mercedes had a greater range and was a better belter, but she had no formal training and frankly lousy technique, which she eventually remedied. She was a far more natural singer than Rachel.

“Tina had the same range as Rachel and Mercedes, but was a better vocalist than the former and had better technique than the latter. Santana had the greatest range because she had fully developed her middle voice, connecting her chest and head voices seamlessly. In my opinion, hers was the best female voice in the school, followed by Tina.”

“But Rachel didn’t see them as competition.”

“No. Tina wanted solos, but wasn’t going to fight for them; she didn’t have to prove herself to anyone. Mercedes wanted solos, but because she wanted to best Rachel, who always downplayed Mercedes' talent, though not to the same extreme she did me. Santana didn’t have the confidence in her voice that it deserved, so she was content just to sing at all. No, as far as Rachel was concerned, her only competition was me.”

“She was scared of you.”

“Of what I would become, maybe. Like I said, my voice was thin. It was years before it developed weight and timbre, its colors and textures. I had a huge, flexible range I could navigate without issue, and I could hit all the notes Rachel could and beyond, but I couldn’t belt or match her for power.

“My musicality and versatility were better than hers, as was my phrasing and interpretation. My technique was solid and far better, but wouldn’t pay off for years to come. Rachel could open her mouth and sing beautifully, but everything she sang sounded the same. The emotion was manufactured or absent altogether. She was interested in her own performance and nothing else. That saddened me because she could have been so much more.”

Zach wasn’t interested in Rachel’s talent. “She knew you were the better singer.”

Kurt smiled. “She was the only one who did. I don’t blame the others anymore, if I ever even did. They were singing for fun, because it made them happy, and that really is what it should be about. It took much longer, and much distance, before I forgave our instructor. In hindsight, I realize now that a glee club is about winning competitions, otherwise you won’t have funding and the club is lost to everyone. At the time, Rachel had the best commercial and accessible voice. He took advantage of that and she let him.

“It’s harder for me to forgive her. She knew what music meant to me because it was similar for her. Music didn’t define us, but gave us the opportunities to define ourselves. Every feeling I had – including those I chose to repress, ignore, or deny – I could express with song. I would write my own arrangements or rewrite the lyrics, sometimes even changing the genre. Music made me feel alive. There were moments only music kept me alive.”

Zach felt tears threatening.

“I wasn’t suicidal,” Kurt rushed to say, “but there were times when I wondered, when I believed, how much easier life would be if I didn’t have to live it. But they were only thoughts, Zach, not actions, and they were always fleeting. I imagine many people experience such thoughts at least once in their lives.”

Zach nodded. He had.

“Music saved me. My connection to it was intense, and intensely personal. I was proud of my voice. At the time, I was a countertenor, the only one in the school, and while the pitch of my voice was often ridiculed, no one could deny my talent. That was the one thing no one could take from me.

“But Rachel tried. She never missed an opportunity to undercut me or reduce my ability to a parlor trick. She undermined me constantly. Never to the point where I doubted my talent, but I did doubt my worth. Yes, I could hit all the notes, but not as well as her. There was truth in that, and it hurt. No matter how hard I worked, my voice wasn’t as full or as rich as hers, even if I found her tone shrill.

“She lobbied for every solo, and many times simply to deny me the opportunity. After all, why should I sing lead when I was basically singing in her key? The instructor agreed with her. I often wondered why he shot me down so often. Was it latent homophobia? Perhaps. Maybe he was just trying, in his ham-fisted way, to spare me further ridicule. He knew he was hurting me – he had to have known – but I believe his intention was to help.

“Rachel wanted to hurt me, and Glee was the only way she could. I outclassed her in every other arena, and she was very jealous of my relationship with Finn. They were dating and in love, but there was a part of his heart that belonged solely to me, no matter how many times she tried to steal it. Finn and I had our issues, but we also had a visceral connection we couldn’t deny, though there were moments we were desperate to do just that.”

Zach stared. Jesus, he already hated this woman and didn’t even know her.

“Rachel is the type of personality that requires a foil,” Kurt explained. “She could only validate herself by invalidating someone else. I was academically and athletically superior and she couldn’t compete with me along those lines, but she could with music. For whatever reason, she long ago zeroed in on me as the one most likely to challenge her. She needed me to do that to prove to herself she had worth.”

“You sound as though you feel sorry for her.”

Kurt was silent for a very long time. “I suppose I do,” he finally admitted. “Rachel didn’t have it easy. She understood firsthand the homophobia that pervaded every crevice of that town. She had seen it leveled at her fathers for her entire life. She had been mocked and scorned for being the product of a gay couple. She suffered against anti-Semitism and misogyny.

“Her struggles were very real. When she looked at me, she saw things she saw in herself; things she had internalized or been conditioned to dislike.”

“You mean she projected her insecurities onto you,” Zach spat, glaring.

“Yes, and she believed she could only defeat them by defeating me.”

Zach wanted to strangle this woman.

“I don’t like her,” Kurt continued. “I’ve tried numerous times for Finn’s sake, but I can’t make myself like her. I respect her because of her talent. I respect her because she truly loves Finn. I respect her because she is his wife and the mother of his children. But I will never like her. That hurts Finn, and I am deeply sorry for that, but it’s just how it is.”

He paused. “She hurt me badly, and I allowed her to do that. She might very well be a different person now. She probably is. She’s a wife and mother, and I don’t know her in those roles. I will say that, in those moments we have spoken, she has been nothing but kind – almost excruciatingly so. She now respects my relationship with Finn. She encourages me to be an uncle to her children. I think … I think she looks at her children and imagines how she would feel if someone treated them the way she did me.”

Zach tilted his head. “You think Greenlee is another Rachel.”

Kurt blinked. “Wow. You’re good.” He sighed. “I don’t know, but if she is, I want to protect Kendall, even though I know she’s more than capable of protecting herself. Still, they’re blind to each other in ways that could hurt them the most.”

“That’s why you want me to assume control of Cambias Industries. Not only to return Enchantment Cosmetics to Erica, not just to help fund the Miranda Center, but to give Kendall total control over Fusion. You want Greenlee out.”

Kurt’s eyes sparked. “I knew Kendall was my cousin when she founded Fusion, so I paid close attention to its development. I won’t deny Greenlee has her talents, but the idea belonged to Kendall. The prototypes were created by Kendall. Greenlee had the money, but the dream was owned by Kendall.

“Her life has been well-documented in the press. She’s a child of rape, like my mother. She spent her youth in search of an identity, for a place to belong, and when she found it, she was unwelcome. She fought for that identity even though she was repulsed by its origin. I don’t blame Erica for denying her. I know too well the pain of rape. I’m so very glad they made their peace and learned to love each other.

“Fusion is the one thing Kendall managed to create for herself. It’s the one thing in her life she didn’t destroy because of her own self-loathing, railing against a singularity that had nothing to do with her. I’ve managed to scrape together some shares of Fusion when they became available, but not enough to give Kendall a controlling interest.”

He stared into Zach’s eyes. “I need you for that.”

“You’ve got me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder that this is an AU. Kurt's relationship with Rachel in this story is not canon, and his recounting is distinctly unilateral. If you're a fan of Rachel, that's fine, but please remember that this is another universe.


End file.
